Quote Quoting flyingron
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The lender is free to make any requirements.

However, you're getting bent out of shape over no reason. It matters not who the 1098 is made out to. All it matters is that she is obligated to pay the interest and she does pay the interest. The IRS doesn't get bent out of shape about which joint tenant claims the interest as long as they total claimed between them doesn't exceed the total interest.
Thanks for replying. How would the IRS even know we are joint tenants on the tax return my fiance would file? If I get the forms, and my fiance sends them in, name and SSN won't match, so won't that be a red flag?

Also, I'm still trying to find out HOW it's determined to who the tax forms are sent. Does anyone know the answer to this question?