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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    1

    Default Evicting a long-term companion, not on the lease

    Massachusetts: I am writing from my place of employment. I wish to permanently & immediately end an 8-year (on again, off again) relationship with a very emotionally unstable, violent & suicidal 36-yr-old man I am currently residing with. I am a mature professional, single and 49. Because I cared so much about this individual starting in 1998, I now know I made a serious mistake years ago by taking him "under my wing" in attempts to assist him in alcohol recovery, psychological problems & "get healthy" i.e., Mass Health sign-up, driver's license training, considerable counseling & doctor appts., van purchase for him + insurance (there's tons more I have done for this continuously disrespectful man).

    Things have viciously accelerated. He is now addicted to "smoke" & World of Warcraft (addictive computer game) & he refuses to go to work. I have asked him nicely several times to find another place to live, and he refuses. He demands to use my computer, so I keep changing the entry password when he doesn't go to work. Each time, he yells and threatens me until I get up and enter the password. I'm not getting any sleep (we work opposite shifts). He says if I "make" him leave, he will destroy my personal property and erase all my computer files. I have changed passwords on my computer several times after he refuses to go to work for punishment (his broke his from being irresponsible). He has no family and a couple of social friends locally. Same for me..

    Currently living together in rental since 2/05 - verbal approval from landlord for him to be
    there - not on Lease.
    Electric bill (only) in his name since 2/05 (verbal agreement - another mistake).
    No job 2/06-7/06; FT 8/06-10/06; finally on 11/27/06 lost job, because of various addictions &
    refusal to go to work
    I de-commission his van; canceled his insurance 11/16/06 for not going to work as
    punishment; this didn't work.
    Police report 11/27/06 because he refused to go to work (things came to a "head," I locked him
    out, police told him to go to work - he came back & kicked in the door - it won't lock now.)
    (2) previous restraining orders in 2001 & 2003 from physically abusing me from drinking (the
    court knows him well).

    I am emotionally completely finished with this relationship (for good now), but am living in hell & am afraid of damage & possible future physical abuse. I have to be careful, as I don't want to get hurt making the wrong decision on how to remove him. I don't wish to involve the landlord unless I have to (he is unaware of our troubles and damages). I'm afraid this will ruin my excellent reputation with him and not allow me to make a healthy choice in having another roommate in the near future. If so, I can't afford to live there, and I have a lease through August 2007.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: Companion Refuses to Work-Want to Remove - MA (not on lease)

    I personally would consider approaching it as a tenancy at will, and use a formal eviction process (as described here). You can also ask the local police if they would let you simply put him out of the house as a houseguest, but it will be hard to keep him out without changing the locks - but to change the locks you normally need your landlord's permission. It's probably going to be hard to do anything without the landlord figuring out that there is a problem.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    I live here. Actually in a little area called the Knob. In Ohio
    Posts
    292

    Default Re: Evicting a long-term companion, not on the lease

    I think if this was me I would arrange for him to take a mini-vacation somewhere and pack up everything I owned and move. Tell the landlord you plan on moving and ask them not to inform your *room mate*. If necessary pay the rent until August even if that means the appartment sits empty because most likely the landlord will have your friend put out. Just cut your losses and run.

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