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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
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    6

    Default Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    My question involves child support in the State of: connecticut

    I am a 21 year old father of a 4 year old daughter. I have received a letter in the mail stating that her mother is trying to get child support. Me and her mother have not been together since our daughter was born. Ever since she was born, I have always supported my daughter when it came to formula, diapers, clothes, and all other expenses for when she was at my house as well as her mothers house. We do not have anything written from the court but we have agreed that our daughter would stay with me two weeks at a time and two weeks at a time at her mother's. Her mother would seem to always move; as she has moved 3 times in a matter of 3 years. I have not moved. I am a full time student and becoming a nurse and her mother is working (no college). There were times where she could not watch our daughter so I would keep her longer than intended. I would even say it has gotten to the point where our daughter stays with me a greater amount of time than with her mother. Also, ever since our daughter was born, her mother has received wik and state insurance for her and I would just provide for our daughter without any state assistance. I do not think it is fair that she is coming after me for child support because I believe if anything, she owes me child support but I would never go that route. I would like to ask for advice as to what I should do. Thank you

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
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    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    How do you know it's Mom? It might be the State of Connecticut. They'll use a formula to figure out how much support you will pay.
    http://www.jud.ct.gov/childsupport/
    Don't make me quote Monty Python at you.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
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    1,988

    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    her mother has received wik and state insurance for her
    it's not up to mom, when the taxpayers are paying to support your kid, coming after you for child support is a requirement.

  4. #4
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    Jun 2014
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    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    Is there a way I could avoid that? I'm under my grandmothers insurance but both my daughter and her mother are on state insurance? Can I take custody of my daughter or put her under my insurance? I don't need assistance from the state to provide for her so is there a way to avoid all of this?

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    Quote Quoting Dm93
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    Is there a way I could avoid that? I'm under my grandmothers insurance but both my daughter and her mother are on state insurance? Can I take custody of my daughter or put her under my insurance? I don't need assistance from the state to provide for her so is there a way to avoid all of this?
    The State/Court/Judge has heard all of this before. Get ready to pay your CS. Go read the link I provided for you earlier.
    Don't make me quote Monty Python at you.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Virginia
    Posts
    604

    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    Quote Quoting Dm93
    View Post
    Is there a way I could avoid that? I'm under my grandmothers insurance but both my daughter and her mother are on state insurance? Can I take custody of my daughter or put her under my insurance? I don't need assistance from the state to provide for her so is there a way to avoid all of this?

    You don't need custody to put your daughter on your insurance, generally speaking. Call your insurance company to find out your options. You may need to wait for an open enrollment period, or they may make some kind of exception for you. But you need to call and find out what their policies are.

    Since you have 50/50 right now, it's probably a good idea to get that in the form of a court order.

    Most states still order child support in 50/50 situations if one parent makes more than the other. Though not all, and when they do usually it's not the full amount. Check your state laws.

    Also, some states go after the other parent for reimbursement of some types of state aid, but not always all types. For example, in my state you must have an order for child support if the other parent receives tanf, but it's not required for health care, WIC, or food stamps. You need to find out what Connecticut's laws say. Though it may or may not make a difference to you.

    An attorney is probably a good idea to best figure out how to get your 50/50 custody signed off by a judge so mom doesn't get the itch to change her mind about that.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
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    6

    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    What if I don't have a job? I've been unemployed for a while now

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    38,867

    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    Quote Quoting Dm93
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    What if I don't have a job? I've been unemployed for a while now

    if you don't have a job it would be a good idea to try to obtain one. Whether the child resides with you or the mother, you are going to be shelling out a lot of money over the next couple of decades.



    if you are referring to the child support;

    they will keep record of how much you owe them and add to the total every week.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Virginia
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    604

    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    Quote Quoting Dm93
    View Post
    What if I don't have a job? I've been unemployed for a while now
    If the child support issue is in fact related to the aid she is receiving, discussing your situation with your local social services office would be a good idea. Although they are not always the most sympathetic people. But you need to do your homework on the whole situation. It's also possible that mom is lying about how often she and you each have the child.

    And you need to get a job. Does mom work? Who is supporting this child besides the taxpayers?

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    38,867

    Default Re: Mother is Trying to Get Child Support from Already Supportive Father

    I want to know how he is providing all this support to the child he is claiming when he doesn't have any income. Seems a bit implausible to me.

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