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  1. #1
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    May 2014
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    Default Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Louisiana

    My ex husband just recently passed away. He was military and living in the state of ok. We had joint custody of the kids, but I only just recently found this out. After he passed away my children were left in his will to go to his brother.(who has them now) I have called ok and there were no cases filed with the family last name. So the only custody that I know has been given is guardianship through the will to the brother. The family has not called me to inform me of any of this, I had to find out through a mutual friend. I have already talked to one lawyer (felt like he was brushing me off) and he said just take my divorce papers go to the local police department, let them know what is going on and then just pick up my kids. Knowing this family as I do I know that it won't be that simple and anything and everything I do I want to do as legal as possible. I'm currently waiting to hear from a second lawyer to see what he says. I do know in Louisiana there are no grandparents right and less rights as you go down the line. I have been denied my children for to long and I believe they should be with me. I miss my babies and now more than ever they need their mom. So what I'm wanting/needing to know is what can I do? Is there more I can do?

  2. #2
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    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    Um, you cannot gift children like property in a will. At most you can nominate a guardian who would then go to the courts and apply to be named guardian.


    unless there is a reason you are not allowed contact with your children, they are your children. If it has been a lengthy time since you have seen them a court may delay you taking custody of them while you are introduced to their life but other than that, you are the parent and unless your parental rights were terminated, they still are there.

  3. #3
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    May 2014
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    My rights were never terminated. I was only denied my kids because he didn't want me in their lives.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    Quote Quoting lil_butterfly3
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    My rights were never terminated. I was only denied my kids because he didn't want me in their lives.
    So, how long since you have seen your children?

    you so realize that a custody and visitation order is not enforceable as the parents see fit. They are court orders and refusing to comply with them can be a very costly mistake.

    what did you do to enforce your visitation order?

  5. #5
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    May 2014
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    Its been too long. When I and others read the divorce papers it was to my understanding that I could only ask for 30 days of the summer which he could and did say no to. I didn't push that violation because I couldn't afford to pay my child support and I knew if I pushed he'd push and i'd end up going to jail. After he passed and rereading the d papers for like the 100th time it was only then did I and others realize that I had joint custody.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    Quote Quoting lil_butterfly3
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    Its been too long. When I and others read the divorce papers it was to my understanding that I could only ask for 30 days of the summer which he could and did say no to. I didn't push that violation because I couldn't afford to pay my child support and I knew if I pushed he'd push and i'd end up going to jail. After he passed and rereading the d papers for like the 100th time it was only then did I and others realize that I had joint custody.
    if that is all the visitation you were granted and he was allowed to deny it, there is a lot you have not said here.

  7. #7
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    Nov 2007
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    Officially across the country from where I've been all my life
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    Quote Quoting lil_butterfly3
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    Its been too long.
    The answer to this question is going to matter HUGE as to whether you have a chance of regaining your children. Now, would you please stop beating around the bush and making excuses and tell us HOW LONG IT'S BEEN SINCE YOU'VE SEEN YOUR CHILDREN?

  8. #8
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    May 2014
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    I think you are not reading what I say very well, "After he passed and rereading the d papers for like the 100th time it was only then did I and others realize that I had joint custody. " I had more rights than I knew I had. I'm not leaving anything out other than mine and his history and I don't think that needs to be posted being it has nothing to do with anything that is happening now nor does anything that is now past. Right now I am trying to get my kids back with me, the only living parent they have.

  9. #9
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    Jun 2006
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    Massachusetts
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    And I think you are not reading the questions you are being asked very well, and they are being asked for a purpose.

    Either answer the question of how long it has been since you've seen your children, or go pay an attorney to answer your questions.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Custody After Death of Primary Caregiver

    Quote Quoting lil_butterfly3
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    I think you are not reading what I say very well, "After he passed and rereading the d papers for like the 100th time it was only then did I and others realize that I had joint custody. " I had more rights than I knew I had. I'm not leaving anything out other than mine and his history and I don't think that needs to be posted being it has nothing to do with anything that is happening now nor does anything that is now past. Right now I am trying to get my kids back with me, the only living parent they have.
    if you were granted 30 days during the summer and the father had the right to refuse to allow the time, yes, there is some other issue not disclosed. That is so far from a standard visitation order it strongly suggests there was a reason your visitation was so limited. What is being left out could affect your current issue a lot.

    between that and failing to actually provide an answer to how long it has been, well, I'm outta here. Best of luck.

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