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  1. #1
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    Default How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different State

    My question involves restraining orders in the State of: CA

    So I was contacted by Police that my ex will be filing a restraining order. This police officer was accusing me of posting naked pictures online of my ex. Which I have no pictures and have done no such thing. I told him over and over that I didn't do any of these things. He continued to badger me like I did it or was involved. The officer even left a threatening message on my voicemail.

    My ex had accused me of this in the past which I sent a "cease and desist" letter from false accusations, harassment and slander. I even told the officer I have proof I issued these things which he ignored.

    Anyway... I need to know what to do from being out of state to protect my clean record (criminal or public)

    The ex knows that I do government contract work that requires high security clearance, own firearms, and also going through custody battles with an ex-wife. She is trying to tarnish my good name and this is her basic legal form of harassment to hurt me.

    I can't afford to spend thousands of dollars to fly to another state, do I have to show up for a hearing in person or can I do it over the phone? I believe this is ironically screwed up, that as a victim I have to pay money to protect myself and my freedoms.

    I also have email records of me continuously telling her to leave me alone. She has no basis to turn things around on me, why is the court system so screwed up that she can get this without any proof? This is many states away and I can't just fly down there to fairly represent myself.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Ok, so... I'm assuming your ex-gf is a malicious prick. First off, I strongly doubt that she is going to use civil discovery in an attempt to allege that you posted these "alleged" nude pictures. I mean, that would require her having an IP address, proving that you were at the location that the IP address is located at, and so forth. So, right off the bat, I'm assuming she has no evidence to prove that you posted those nude pictures. Furthermore, if those judges are worth their salt, they damn well knew that, especially if there was no motion for discovery. Many people like restraining orders, because they are free. As such, you can generally assume that no petitioner is going to hire an attorney or spend a cent actually seeking a restraining order. In many ways, a person who is serious about protection will be attempting to involve the police (which seems to have happened her, so be careful). You may want to get copies of police reports against you by using the Freedom of Information Act, thus polling the police department in her city for police reports against you. Also, you may want to be aware of the Rule of Evidence 803(8)..something, whereby police reports are hearsay without the witnessing police officer present. More than likely, if the district attorney is not involved in the case, the ex will be too ignorant of the law in order to win the civil case against you if you deny everything, which appears to be your situation.

    In reference to the police officer, I'm surprised the police officer was not from Bumpkin, California. California is a two-party consent state when it comes to telephone communications, so unless one individual gives permission (implied or explicit) for a telephone conversation to be recorded (say one side, an automated message, states that a call will be recorded--if even for training purposes), then the police officer cannot use anything you say over the telephone as evidence against you. However, I'm not sure how speakphones work, reasonable suspcion from telephone calls, and so forth. Hell, I'm not too sure if you could have hung up on the police officer: I think you could have. If the police officer left a threatening message on your voicemail, you may want to take the issue to an attorney and determine if the police officer is liable for anything.

    If your ex is using false accusation, harassment, and slander, then you may want to go file suit against her. Hire an attorney to go take care of that. Defamation is a different issue from restraining orders. Harassment, however, is something that may be actionable, thus enabling you to file a restraining order against her. If you have evidence of the harassment, I suggest you seek a restraining order against your ex-gf as soon as possible, especially if you plan on escalating the issue with a defamation lawsuit (you may want to learn about the tort of false light).

    Ironically screwed up? Well... the legal system does not see it that way. And yeah, until babies are born with chips in their brains that enable anyone to be an attorney, I understand that people are ignorant of the law. However, the legal system believes that no one is ignorant of the law (whatever that means in relation to the philosophy of law). As such, any pro se individual is just as powerful as an attorney. You might be able to talk to the courthouse where your ex file and see if you can do some long distance telephony kind of thing. Ask what your options are.

    Why can the court system allow her to file without any proof? Well, if you could ever get a judge to admit it, I reason it's about money. Restraining orders are a way for government systems to make money. It's about money. Good luck getting a judge to admit to felony fraud, however. Sometimes people are a danger to others and the restraining orders are valuable. I do not believe that you are an imminent threat to her.

    That you have emails telling her to leave you alone is not relevant when you're the defendant. However, those emails and her actions against you may work well in you petitioning for a restraining order against her. If you're darn sure you have no interest in ever associating with that woman again, want nothing more to do with her, and she is dead to you, then go file a restraining order against her. After you get done fighting off the restraining order (if she did place it on you), I suggest you get an attorney and sue her.

    You may want to research concepts, such as "mens rea" and "actus reus." Also, you may want to read about appeal rights. And, in addition, you may want to read the state statues and legislation in relation to the restraining order that was allegedly filed against you.

    Also, that you work for the government and are allegedly high-security, I suggest you start learning to think like an attorney. It might help you fight off other members of the government who give a capitalistic, dog-eat-dog appearance.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Quote Quoting lokinman
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    My question involves restraining orders in the State of: CA

    So I was contacted by Police that my ex will be filing a restraining order.
    Well, they can't KNOW that unless she has already applied for the order. They likely told you to leave her alone and stop doing whatever it was she said you were doing because she was considering it or SAID she would file an order.

    This police officer was accusing me of posting naked pictures online of my ex. Which I have no pictures and have done no such thing. I told him over and over that I didn't do any of these things. He continued to badger me like I did it or was involved. The officer even left a threatening message on my voicemail.
    IF this was an officer, he was likely playing hardball to get you to stop doing what she was claiming you did.

    Of course there's the possibility that this was NOT a cop at all.

    My ex had accused me of this in the past which I sent a "cease and desist" letter from false accusations, harassment and slander. I even told the officer I have proof I issued these things which he ignored.
    A "cease and desist" has no legal bearing whatsoever. And it doesn't mean that what was done was untrue, only that you told her to stop.

    Anyway... I need to know what to do from being out of state to protect my clean record (criminal or public)
    Don't communicate with this woman, if served with a restraining order, seek the advice of counsel and respond as instructed. Don't miss any court dates.

    But, if you live out of state, the odds of a TRO being issued is slim as it will be hard to argue that you are a threat to her.

    The ex knows that I do government contract work that requires high security clearance, own firearms, and also going through custody battles with an ex-wife. She is trying to tarnish my good name and this is her basic legal form of harassment to hurt me.
    Then you might want to consider engaging an attorney ASAP.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Quoting tophat
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    Ok, so... I'm assuming your ex-gf is a malicious prick. First off, I strongly doubt that she is going to use civil discovery in an attempt to allege that you posted these "alleged" nude pictures. I mean, that would require her having an IP address, proving that you were at the location that the IP address is located at, and so forth. So, right off the bat, I'm assuming she has no evidence to prove that you posted those nude pictures. Furthermore, if those judges are worth their salt, they damn well knew that, especially if there was no motion for discovery.
    First, she can't seek "discovery" without some form of court action. Accoding to the OP the "officer" stated that the GF was going to be filing for an order.

    Second, a TRO will not be about posting nude photos online, it will be about threats of harm to the OP.

    If she wants to sue him for damages, then the photos will be more important. Absent some credible belief that he is a threat to her, no TRO should issue from this. Now, there are laws that protect people from revenge postings of nude photos, but that's not part of the TRo process.

    Many people like restraining orders, because they are free.
    If related to a DV they can be free, but a CHO costs money. As this is likely a past dating relationship, you're right that it probably doesn't cost the petitioner any money.

    You may want to get copies of police reports against you by using the Freedom of Information Act, thus polling the police department in her city for police reports against you.
    The FOIA does not cover local police reports. In this case, it would be the CPRA and Goverment Code 6254. However, he would likely have to get a court order for their release since the police are unlikely to release a DV report or any allegations involving a domestic incident so long as it is an investigative file. Until or unless the matter is closed, they have no legal obligation to release it.

    Also, you may want to be aware of the Rule of Evidence 803(8)..something, whereby police reports are hearsay without the witnessing police officer present.
    For TRO hearings, the courts will generally accept the report as it is without requiring the appearance of an officer. The defendant is certainly free to challenge the veracity, of course.

    More than likely, if the district attorney is not involved in the case, the ex will be too ignorant of the law in order to win the civil case against you if you deny everything, which appears to be your situation.
    The DA will not be involved in a civil case as this will be.

    In reference to the police officer, I'm surprised the police officer was not from Bumpkin, California. California is a two-party consent state when it comes to telephone communications, so unless one individual gives permission (implied or explicit) for a telephone conversation to be recorded (say one side, an automated message, states that a call will be recorded--if even for training purposes), then the police officer cannot use anything you say over the telephone as evidence against you.
    You gotta read the law a little closer ... PC 630 et seq We can record any conversation we are a party to as well as others under certain circumstances (such as pretext phone calls involving one party knowing about the recording calling another with the intent to elicit evidence).

    If the police officer left a threatening message on your voicemail, you may want to take the issue to an attorney and determine if the police officer is liable for anything.
    Depends on what the officer said. If the officer said he could be arrested if he did or didn't do something, that likely does not constitute a threat. But, of course, the caller may not have been an officer at all.

    If your ex is using false accusation, harassment, and slander, then you may want to go file suit against her. Hire an attorney to go take care of that. Defamation is a different issue from restraining orders. Harassment, however, is something that may be actionable, thus enabling you to file a restraining order against her.
    A defamation suit, or even for "harassment," can be expensive. He can expect to pay at least $10,000 for the attempt and take a couple of years - and he will have to appear in court to testify if it goes to trial. Not likely to happen, but if he has money to burn to try and scare her, he's welcome.

    Restraining orders are a way for government systems to make money.
    What money? Who does the defendant pay if the order is issued?

  4. #4
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Thanks for the information...

    So this is the update...
    The ex emailed me, stating a notice of TRO and the courthouse where filed, etc..etc.. (still not served with any papers, as of yet)
    I filed a written complaint to the sheriffs office about the phone call about the officers conduct.

    Now a few questions I did have, since you mention the DA and civil cases... They said that it's criminal case for posting nude pictures or whatever, I don't even know exactly what they were referring to, said something about facebook, and my facebook has never had any of that stuff. He said that stuff was criminal in California and I'm the main suspect in an investigation or something.

    Since I didn't do it, I'm not worried about the IP thing or any of that.

    I've been divorced in the past, so I know how screwed up judges can be. I will look into the telephone appearing thing, but from the research I gathered so far, they won't do that. You have to appear in person. Or lose by default. This is where I get concerned... I don't want to spend 5k+ to travel and lose work and defend my self to frivolous nonsense that has completely no merit.

    I know I haven't been served yet, but I'm just preparing myself in case... I don't want to lose my 2nd amendment, or have any issues with child custody with a different ex, or have any work related issues. Esp. something based off hearsay.

    Just crossing my fingers that it will somehow blow over and nothing happens to my record. Last thing I want is to lose a bunch more money on having to get rid of my firearms for 10 years for some bs DV charge with no merit. That's the worse thing of all. They shouldn't even be able to get a TRO without proof of anything. Hearsay to ruin someones life and career is complete and udder bs. If I was local it wouldn't be a big deal to show up and defend myself, but when they do this across state lines, it really does screw innocent people over.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Quote Quoting lokinman
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    Now a few questions I did have, since you mention the DA and civil cases... They said that it's criminal case for posting nude pictures or whatever, I don't even know exactly what they were referring to, said something about facebook, and my facebook has never had any of that stuff. He said that stuff was criminal in California and I'm the main suspect in an investigation or something.
    If they are investigating and all they did was leave a message for you and not ask for a statement, then it's a bad investigation. More than likely the call was to try and get you to cease the conduct you are accused of and telling you that the action CAN be charged criminally, not that it has been. if it has been charged, you can either speak with them and deny it, or NOT speak to them and contact an attorney.

    I've been divorced in the past, so I know how screwed up judges can be. I will look into the telephone appearing thing, but from the research I gathered so far, they won't do that. You have to appear in person. Or lose by default. This is where I get concerned... I don't want to spend 5k+ to travel and lose work and defend my self to frivolous nonsense that has completely no merit.
    This distance is also why a TRO is not likely to occur. If there are no articulable threats, and you are far, far away, the court is unlikely to issue even a temporary order much less enforce service upon you.

    http://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-domesticviolence.htm

  6. #6
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Something to consider about a TRO is that some petitioners might list a local address, such as an address within the county. If you have your voters registration still in the county that the petitioner is in, then the court might not realize that you actually live far, far away. Also, I've never understood how the court was suppose to divinate that you actually live far, far away.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Quote Quoting tophat
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    Something to consider about a TRO is that some petitioners might list a local address, such as an address within the county. If you have your voters registration still in the county that the petitioner is in, then the court might not realize that you actually live far, far away. Also, I've never understood how the court was suppose to divinate that you actually live far, far away.
    The address should be on the affidavit as the court is not going to conduct an investigation to search for the defendant's address. And, if the defendant cannot be served, that might indicate that he is indeed far, far, away.

    And, if the plaintiff/applicant intentionally puts a false address on the affidavit, that can cause the application to be thrown out as well.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Thanks for the additional information on the address thing...
    We shared a residence in another state (not CA)
    She moved to CA.. I have nothing down there, never lived there, etc..etc..
    I moved to another state, not CA, or same state of shared residence. (she doesn't know my address, but she could contact people who know)

    I'll just have to sit and wait, see what happens if anything. The cop didn't say anything about a statement, just kept badgering me to stop activity. Even though I told him a dozen times I didn't even have pictures, let a lone post anything. He kept badgering me like I did something. It was a really bad cop, didn't comprehend basic English, or was taking me for a liar. I told him to investigate her, lol. After the nonsense with the cop and the voice-mail, I filed a complaint at his station, haven't heard anything back, nor I expect I will. In my complaint I mentioned writing my senators and going to the media with the unprofessional behavior and harassing voice-mail. Whoever she pissed off or if she is setting me up out of spite, I hope she gets caught lying to police and filing false police reports.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: How to Protect Myself from False Temporary Restraining Order from a Different Sta

    Quote Quoting lokinman
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    I'll just have to sit and wait, see what happens if anything. The cop didn't say anything about a statement, just kept badgering me to stop activity.
    Assuming it was an officer, sounds like the kind of thing some officers would do to try and convince a person who might be causing problems to knock it off. That might be the end of it.

    In my complaint I mentioned writing my senators and going to the media with the unprofessional behavior and harassing voice-mail. Whoever she pissed off or if she is setting me up out of spite, I hope she gets caught lying to police and filing false police reports.
    The local agency ain't gonna give a whit about your Senator or anyone's Senator - even our own. So, that was merely hyperbole as far as the agency will be concerned. They may talk to the officer (assuming he did it) and tell him to coll it next time, but not much is likely to come of it.

    As I said, chances are the phone call and/or the email from her is the only thing you will likely hear on the matter.

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