I am the proud single mother of a beautiful 9 month old baby boy. My son's father was present during the birth and paternity was established on the birth certificate. I also gave my son his father's last name, expecting us to marry. Unfortunately, things did not work out with my son's father due to his subtance and verbal abuse towards me. When I became pregnant we were engaged, but never married and I left when he turned the verbal abuse on my then two month old son. We are currently living with my parents as I get my masters degree and my life together. My son's father is currently paying a generous amount of child support, although late at times, as ordered by the family court of Nassau County, NY, where we reside. I have full custody and am the custodial parent. He never attempted custody or visitation rights through the court, I believe because he was verbally abusive to my son and knew this would come up. Only my family and friends are aware of how bad it was; he is an "angel" in the eyes of his family and friends and they have shown little interest in my son. Because I know how important a positive relationship with a father is, I encouraged supervised visits. Although at first he did not seem very intrested, recently he has come around.
My question is this, can I hyphanate my son's last name to, let's say, "Jones-Smith" instead of the current paternal "Jones". Since he is living with me and my family, all "Smiths", whom provide pretty much everything as far as love, nurture and stable relationships go, wouldn't it be easier for him to identify with us if he was, in part, a "Smith" too? I feel this would make the school years, particularly elementary, easier too. Also, my father produced two daughters, it would be nice to have my son pass down the family name. And with the hyphanization we both get to do so. I presented this to my fathers son and he nodded his head, which I assume was giving me the go ahead. Where do I go from here? Thank you for all information provided.

