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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    1

    Question Getting married and moving out of state

    Well to start, I have two children, by two different men. I am currently living in Kentucky, both dads live within 5 minutes of my home at this time. I was married to my oldest childs father, and was not married to the youngest childs. I am getting married in March to a wonderful man that is in the military, he is currently in Iraq and has not recieved him duty station when he returns to the states. And as everyone knows, in the military you never know where you will go. We are trying to get a base inside the state of Kentucky to make everyone happy. But the fact of the matter is, nothing is for sure. Beings I was married and divorced from the one man, we had papers saying that I could not leave the state of Kentucky without permission, well I have talked to him and he is fine with me moving as long as I allow visitation and is even willing to pay half of all travel and everything. So that went well. But the youngest childs dad, I have yet to talk to him. I have sole custody of my daughter, and he has visitation, that he takes only on the every other weekend and that is it. There is never any phone calls or extra visits, this is because he does not want them and does not call not becasue he is not allowed. So what should I do, should I get a lawyer just in case, or just talk to him. He is not a nice guy and his new wife does not like me at all. We have never had problems, but I am worried. What are the laws in Kentucky, if i have sole custody and I am not distroying a relationship, because he would actually have more time with her if i moved. Now it is exactly 48 days a year. And maybe a holiday for a few hours. My daughter was not even part of his life for the first year of hers, and then he did it out of guilt. She is very attached to me, and does not have a good bond with him. He also has another child that he let move, could he stop me and allow another. I just need to know where I stand before I attempt to talk to him. Please help me.

    Thanks...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    984

    Default Re: Getting Married and Moving out of state

    Quote Quoting CARMENTINA
    View Post
    Well to start, I have two children, by two different men. I am currently living in Kentucky, both dads live within 5 minutes of my home at this time. I was married to my oldest childs father, and was not married to the youngest childs. I am getting married in March to a wonderful man that is in the military, he is currently in Iraq and has not recieved him duty station when he returns to the states. And as everyone knows, in the military you never know where you will go. We are trying to get a base inside the state of Kentucky to make everyone happy. But the fact of the matter is, nothing is for sure. Beings I was married and divorced from the one man, we had papers saying that I could not leave the state of Kentucky without permission, well I have talked to him and he is fine with me moving as long as I allow visitation and is even willing to pay half of all travel and everything. So that went well. But the youngest childs dad, I have yet to talk to him. I have sole custody of my daughter, and he has visitation, that he takes only on the every other weekend and that is it. There is never any phone calls or extra visits, this is because he does not want them and does not call not becasue he is not allowed. So what should I do, should I get a lawyer just in case, or just talk to him. He is not a nice guy and his new wife does not like me at all. We have never had problems, but I am worried. What are the laws in Kentucky, if i have sole custody and I am not distroying a relationship, because he would actually have more time with her if i moved. Now it is exactly 48 days a year. And maybe a holiday for a few hours. My daughter was not even part of his life for the first year of hers, and then he did it out of guilt. She is very attached to me, and does not have a good bond with him. He also has another child that he let move, could he stop me and allow another. I just need to know where I stand before I attempt to talk to him. Please help me.

    Thanks...
    You will still have to get the court's permission, at least you will be able to submit a joint parenting plan for modification, please understand his agreement to pay half of the cost of transportation may change and usually it is the moving party that pays for transportation. Also if the next duty station is far away, that agreement may be different. You will have to do the same with dad #2, if his wife doesn't like you maybe she will be happy to have you and the child move away, is he paying shild support?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
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    not sure
    Posts
    526

    Default Re: Getting Married and Moving out of state

    if his wife doesn't like you maybe she will be happy to have you and the child move away, is he paying shild support?

    The courts don't care who likes who. That was uncalled for and should be ignored.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    984

    Default Re: Getting Married and Moving out of state

    Quote Quoting cissycicle
    View Post
    if his wife doesn't like you maybe she will be happy to have you and the child move away, is he paying shild support?

    The courts don't care who likes who. That was uncalled for and should be ignored.
    That was not in reference to the courts, it was in reference to the fact she hasn't told dad#2 about the potential relocation because of his wife, she is going to have to tell him, she just can't move the child without dad#2's agreement or court approval. I was reframing her fear, a fear she has to face, one way or the other thus it is appropriate. It is not any comment on OP, it is one on dad#2 wife who is not party to the parenting issue presented here but one that can go either way.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
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    not sure
    Posts
    526

    Default Re: Getting married and moving out of state

    My advice stands. The unsolicited opinion is to be ignored as it is off topic.

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