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  1. #11
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    Apr 2009
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    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    Quote Quoting amontavon79
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    Dad is not involved with any of the 3 kids schools. He has no idea what they need to succeed. Mom offered to tutor the child that is failing But dad said the child has to learn on his own. She can't see the kids as often as she needs to be around to help out. She is trying to do as much as possible with the time she has with the kids.
    Have the children been assessed for the possibility of a learning disability?.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
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    Virginia
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    604

    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    I think we need to back up a sec and ask who the OP is in this situation.

    So, who are you?

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    Lake County Ohio
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    18

    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    The other children are doing good. The child that is failing has been tested for a learning disability and he scored off the charts. He has adhd and his dad does nothing to address that issue. He just needs a little more attention from a patient adult. Mom can't get a tutor until homework is brought to her house.

  4. #14
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    Apr 2009
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    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    (I think this is the grandparent)

  5. #15
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    Feb 2011
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    Virginia
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    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    Quote Quoting amontavon79
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    The other children are doing good. The child that is failing has been tested for a learning disability and he scored off the charts. He has adhd and his dad does nothing to address that issue. He just needs a little more attention from a patient adult. Mom can't get a tutor until homework is brought to her house.
    It's mom's job to make sure kid either brings hw to her house, or she communicates with the teachers to get assignments/extra work. It's mom's responsibility to figure out what is going on in those classrooms and what the kid is working on. If mom wants to be a parent, then mom needs to start acting like one now, not say that she will do better than dad after the children come to live with her. I am NOT buying the mom is helpless to do ANYTHING bit.

    If mom can't show some initiative in helping her son in some kind of way, and if the other kids are fine, I fail to see why the children's residential parent needs to be changed to mom.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    Lake County Ohio
    Posts
    18

    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    I am not a grandparent. I am a step parent.

  7. #17
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    Feb 2011
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    Virginia
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    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    Quote Quoting amontavon79
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    I am not a grandparent. I am a step parent.
    Lovely.

    Could you be more forthcoming about which stepparent? Or are you deliberately trying to keep that a secret?

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    Lake County Ohio
    Posts
    18

    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    This is a case of shared custody. She is involved with the school but her son doesn't bring home anything to study with and the father won't allow her to pick her son from school so she can make him bring home his homework. Part of the custody agreement stated that the father had to keep the youngest in counseling and he never took him. Look at my previous posts regarding the home atmosphere. When he was in our care I would sit down with him until he was finished and he understood the material. His grades dropped since he has been with his father.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Virginia
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    604

    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    Mom needs to start building her case for custody (if that's what she wants to do) not by pointing fingers at dad but by showing how her own involvement is helping the child. She needs to show that she is a parent. Not that YOU once upon a time helped the kid with school work.

    That starts by dumping the excuses bit about why she can't do anything. She CAN. I'm exasperated here. Mom can't pick the kid up from school? Ok, but what's stopping her from going in, talking to the teachers, getting resources from them herself, hiring a tutor if she thinks that's what he needs . . . I'm sick of the excuses about how mom's hands are so tied and she's so helpless, and I'm not even the judge. I'm not saying she can solve all of the kid's problems on Wednesdays and weekends, but she CAN do a lot more than make the excuses you're making for her.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Somewhere near Canada
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    Default Re: A Mother Lost Full Custody 4 Years Ago and Now Wants Shared Custody

    Something did just occur to me and the poster won't like it.

    Kiddo is on the way to failing twice? Soooooo...what has CHANGED in the past two years? If he fails this year that's no change from last year. In other words, what has Mom done about it? She hasn't petitioned before now? She's effectively done nothing?

    Yes, I know, I know, it seems counter-intuitive. But it's an important point that some judges will use to toss the petition on its backside before you can blink.

    On paper, Mom's done absolutely jack about her son's issues at school.

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