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  1. #1

    Default Restraining Orders During Divorce Proceedings

    My question involves restraining orders in the State of: California.

    My soon to be ex-wife filled a restraining order against me. The bases for the restraining order was that she is fearful of me, that I have a drinking problem, that she returned home from a trip to unknowingly an empty home after I moved out, that I abandoned my animals. She requested $650 for the month of May's rent.

    The court date was on May 20th, I was not present.

    What I want to know is what is the chances of the judge since I did not appear the first time to be willing to look at documents showing that the accusations are false. Here is what I have:

    A letter from the property manager where we lived stating that on April 29th (I moved out on April 27) showing that I submitted a 30 day notice, and on May 13 before the court date my ex signed my name off the lease no longer holding me legally responsible for the property.

    Text messages from my ex with conversations asking me to get a money order for the rent I did pay her that she did not tell the judge. And text showing that she was fully aware that I was moving out, and advising her that I had removed all of my things from the property.

    She did not tell the judge that the same day I moved out she moved her girlfriend and her mother in the apartment. She also did not tell the judge that we agreed on a specific amount of rent I would pay to help her, and that she was already paid that amount.

    Since the restraining order I have received messages from her on fb telling me how much she missed me and that she was thinking of me. She keeps creating new fb accounts under different names to contact me, and her girlfriend keeps contacting me as well requesting the money.

    I know that not being in court looks bad on my part, but after being with someone for 16 years I honestly did not think that she would take things this far. Especially since she knows that she has no reason to fear me, if she did why would she contact me. Also I was never served with the documents from court. One morning I noticed that I was being followed to work by my ex (my job is 20 miles from where she lives, we live in the same city). I stopped at 7-11 to get coffee her girlfriend through a manila envelope at me but I never picked it up off the ground. My wife was right there with her and I said that she could not be around me, and my wife stated that I am the one restrained and she can do what ever she wants to me.

    So now I have to go back to court on contempt charges for not paying her the 650. And I now live in a secluded area on a one way street and they are both driving by my apartment.

    I know that I messed up not going to court. I just want all of this to stop. I know that I will probably go to jail for contempt of court. But all of these accusations are false. She even told me that the only reason she put the restraining order on me was so that I could not come to the house because her girlfriend is there. I am the one with the emotional and physical scares from when she sliced my arm open with a knife in 2010.

    Please someone help me.

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Default Re: Restraining Orders During Divorce Proceedings

    Why did you choose not to attend the court hearing back in May?

  3. #3

    Default Re: Restraining Orders During Divorce Proceedings

    Because I felt intimidated by being there with her, I showed up. But it was a very emotional thing for me. I did not think she would take it this far. Yes, I know dumb move on my part.

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