Ordered Not to Be Around My Child - Can She Run Away to Live With Me

[2ndchancemommmy]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of:
Okay, so long story made short. I was a young mom and made some mistakes. My daughter was taken away from me when she was 2. Her father recently brought me back into her life and things were going really great. Well, he got into some deep trouble. Since she was taken from me when she was younger, the state of Iowa says that I am not to be around her. She wants to live with me, but they won't legally let us be around each other. She is with a family member. She is 14, almost 15. Her dad is telling her that when she turns 16, she can go where ever she wants to. She says that she will just run away to live with me. I do not think that Iowa has legal emancipation laws for these kinds of circumstance. What can I do? Or what can she do?

[Antigone]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of:
Okay, so long story made short. I was a young mom and made some mistakes. My daughter was taken away from me when she was 2. Her father recently brought me back into her life and things were going really great. Well, he got into some deep trouble. Since she was taken from me when she was younger, the state of Iowa says that I am not to be around her. She wants to live with me, but they won't legally let us be around each other. She is with a family member. She is 14, almost 15. Her dad is telling her that when she turns 16, she can go where ever she wants to. She says that she will just run away to live with me. I do not think that Iowa has legal emancipation laws for these kinds of circumstance. What can I do? Or what can she do?

I suggest that if you are ordered to stay away from this child that you do so.

[2ndchancemommmy]

Thanks for your reply. That was not my question. I was asking what should she do? Her and I both want to be with each other. What is the best route for her to take to be able to live with me?

[Antigone]

There is nothing for the child to do. The best route for her to take is to listen to whomever is her legal guardian until she is of age and then she can do whatever she wants.

[2ndchancemommmy]

She doesn't have a legal guardian, just a temporary one.

I honestly thought that there were people out there who were all for the reconciliation of parent with their children. It should matter to people that parents make mistakes. I have learned from mine and have done everything that everyone has asked of me for 13 years and still I get nothing. And she is left to suffer. What kind of justice is that for her? She doesn't get either of her parents because the state is deciding her life. That is complete bs.

[Antigone]

She doesn't have a legal guardian, just a temporary one.

I honestly thought that there were people out there who were all for the reconciliation of parent with their children. It should matter to people that parents make mistakes. I have learned from mine and have done everything that everyone has asked of me for 13 years and still I get nothing. And she is left to suffer. What kind of justice is that for her? She doesn't get either of her parents because the state is deciding her life. That is complete bs.

What is happening to her is YOUR failure, your behaviour was complete B.S. and you just can't decide that you are ready to be a good mommy now. Her living arrangements and her well-being are not your legal business. How and where she lives is up to her legal guardian - temporary or not.

[2ndchancemommmy]

Do you know me? Do you know what happened 13 years ago? No! Do not sit there and judge me based on your opinions.

I started this thread trying to get opinions on what she can do to get what SHE wants. This is not about what I want or what I feel would be best for her. She is the one who is telling me that she wants to live with me and that she is not happy where she is at.

If you took offense to what I have said in my posts, that is your fault. Nothing I said was to offend you. It is my opinion on the situation.

And for your information, I have always been a good mom, I have always put my kids' needs before mine. I was not the type of mom who was on drugs or partied or anything like that. I worked all the time. I took care of my kids. I just happened to make that one mistake that resulted in her being taken away. Not that any of this is your business. But, I am the one who started this post. So I am basically putting my business out there.

If only all parents would look out for what is best for their kids and not themselves.

[Antigone]

Do you know me? Do you know what happened 13 years ago? No! Do not sit there and judge me based on your opinions.

I started this thread trying to get opinions on what she can do to get what SHE wants. This is not about what I want or what I feel would be best for her. She is the one who is telling me that she wants to live with me and that she is not happy where she is at.

If you took offense to what I have said in my posts, that is your fault. Nothing I said was to offend you. It is my opinion on the situation.

And for your information, I have always been a good mom, I have always put my kids' needs before mine. I was not the type of mom who was on drugs or partied or anything like that. I worked all the time. I took care of my kids. I just happened to make that one mistake that resulted in her being taken away. Not that any of this is your business. But, I am the one who started this post. So I am basically putting my business out there.

If only all parents would look out for what is best for their kids and not themselves.

She cannot legally make any decisions, so stop trying to encourage this. Your true colors are showing, lady. If you had truly changed you would definitely not be encouraging her to run away with you.

At the end of the day this is about you and what you want, not what is best for the daughter you dumped 13 years ago.

I feel sorry for this child.

[2ndchancemommmy]

Ok, so I first put this into a child custody forum, but somehow the title has been changed. I have never encourage her to run away to come live with me. I have told her that we have to do this the legal way. If people would read my first post, it says that her dad has told her that she could run away at 16. She gets mad daily when I tell her that we can't do things the way she wants to or at the pace that she wants to. She asked me today if I would do some research, so I started this post to get opinions. Apparently, this is not a site for people who actually have those, but for people who want to sit there and judge based on someone's mistakes.

[Antigone]

Ok, so I first put this into a child custody forum, but somehow the title has been changed. I have never encourage her to run away to come live with me. I have told her that we have to do this the legal way. If people would read my first post, it says that her dad has told her that she could run away at 16. She gets mad daily when I tell her that we can't do things the way she wants to or at the pace that she wants to. She asked me today if I would do some research, so I started this post to get opinions. Apparently, this is not a site for people who actually have those, but for people who want to sit there and judge based on someone's mistakes.

I told you what legally can or can't be done. She is not a candidate for emancipation at this time. She needs to listen to her legal guardian. End of story. When she is of age, she can live where she wants.