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  1. #1

    Default Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: New Jersey

    I am currently pregnant and do not want my ex boyfriend to sign birth certificate and I would like my child to have my last name. My ex has threatened that I better get a good lawyer because he plans to legally change my child's last name to his when we go to court. He is also saying that he will get half custody of our child which I also do not want because he has no license, over 7 driving on suspended tickets thats are currently pending, currently on a methadone program, and is currently on PTI for the second time (which I think is NJ's mistake) for empty bags of heroin in his car. His mother is helping him get an apartment and a lawyer. My question is: Do I even need a lawyer? I have been at the same job for over 7 years. I have lived in my apartment for 2 1/2 years and have no record of any drug use or arrests. I have a valid driver's license also.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    I have read this forum enough to know wha RULE #1 is:

    Never listen to legal advice from your ex.

    50/50 is not reasonable for an infant (not even if they live next door). Now, it is completely reasonable for him to get 50/50 later, but as a newborn, no. You can expect him to get age-appropriate visitation.

    If he has a lawyer, I would get a lawyer. Not because he's scaring you, but just to make sure you don't get taken advantage of.

    And in most cases of name disputes, the name becomes hyphenated. If you want to save yourself some money in court costs, go ahead and hyphenate the name yourself.

    One more thing...it is not unreasonable for a father to get primary either. Maybe not this particular father, but I'm speaking in general.

    To add another thing...since you aren't married, he will have to establish paternity. You do not have to acknowledge paternity unless you agree. But if you don't, he still can through the courts.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    Quote Quoting dyedlaughing
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    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: New Jersey

    I am currently pregnant and do not want my ex boyfriend to sign birth certificate and I would like my child to have my last name. My ex has threatened that I better get a good lawyer because he plans to legally change my child's last name to his when we go to court. He is also saying that he will get half custody of our child which I also do not want because he has no license, over 7 driving on suspended tickets thats are currently pending, currently on a methadone program, and is currently on PTI for the second time (which I think is NJ's mistake) for empty bags of heroin in his car. His mother is helping him get an apartment and a lawyer. My question is: Do I even need a lawyer? I have been at the same job for over 7 years. I have lived in my apartment for 2 1/2 years and have no record of any drug use or arrests. I have a valid driver's license also.


    There may still be a legal way for you to never ever have to deal with him again.

    I doubt you'll like it, though.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
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    There may still be a legal way for you to never ever have to deal with him again.

    I doubt you'll like it, though.
    Not the A-word?

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    Abortion is a legal option - it's just the timing which can complicate things according the State law.

    I'm sorry, I'm not going to hide behind the word. I can't. It's an absolutely valid legal option for the OP.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    what way is that? I do not want my daughter having his last name under any circumstances.

    - - - Updated - - -

    lol abortion is not an option. This is my daughter. She is a baby not an embryo. I love her and want her.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    I was being facetious. I know it's a reality.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    I'm sorry shortie - I didn't mean to be defensive.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    Quote Quoting dyedlaughing
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    what way is that? I do not want my daughter having his last name under any circumstances.

    - - - Updated - - -
    Well there are plenty of circumstances in which he might AND you'll have to spend more money on top of that, so I thought I'd save you some money. Why might the baby share a hyphenated name with yours? Because the baby is both of yours.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Can My Ex Boyfriend Legally Change My Baby's Last Name to His After She is Born

    Quote Quoting dyedlaughing
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    what way is that? I do not want my daughter having his last name under any circumstances.

    - - - Updated - - -

    lol abortion is not an option. This is my daughter. She is a baby not an embryo. I love her and want her.

    LOL all you like.

    If Dad wants to be involved, he WILL be allowed to be involved. That includes a name change, which might be granted in his favor. You can't erase him.

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