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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
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    Default Proving Adultery vs. Mutual Agreements

    My question involves a marriage in the state of: Virginia

    Within the past few weeks my wife and I decided to separate, three minor children involved. We both want a swift process and she’s agreed to move out of the apartment when financially stable. I recently found out about an affair that’s been going on for months due to an app installed on her phone I was using for parental monitoring of the children who also use her cell (she does not know this). I know those conversations would probably be inadmissible, I have very little circumstantial evidence, and no direct evidence. I’m confident she’d admit to it, but I’m sure that wouldn’t help considering privileged conversations. We agreed to seek counsel together for a mutual agreement/divorce, so I haven’t yet done so on my own. My only interest in proving the adultery is for alimony and custody purposes should the situation go south.

    Should I get her to admit to it, and is it worth trying to prove adultery?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Default Re: Proving Adultery vs. Mutual Agreements

    Quote Quoting MikeIke
    View Post
    I recently found out about an affair that’s been going on for months due to an app installed on her phone I was using for parental monitoring of the children who also use her cell (she does not know this).
    You want us to believe that your wife gives her phone to your kids when they go off to play with their friends, and that you were so concerned about them that you put a monitoring app of some sort on your wife's phone without telling your wife what you were doing? Sorry, I'm not buying it.
    Quote Quoting MikeIke
    I know those conversations would probably be inadmissible...
    So this app lets you eavesdrop on or record your wife's private conversations? Are you trying to get fitted for a pair of silver bracelets? Given that in order to introduce the recordings you have made of your wife's conversations you would have to admit to a series of felony offenses, I'm not expecting that your lawyer is going to recommend even trying to get them admitted.
    Quote Quoting MikeIke
    ...I have very little circumstantial evidence, and no direct evidence. I’m confident she’d admit to it, but I’m sure that wouldn’t help considering privileged conversations.
    On the other hand, her custody and divorce case become very simple if you're in jail.
    Quote Quoting MikeIke
    We agreed to seek counsel together for a mutual agreement/divorce, so I haven’t yet done so on my own.
    It's time to get moving.
    Quote Quoting MikeIke
    My only interest in proving the adultery is for alimony and custody purposes should the situation go south.
    You can discuss your options with your lawyer, but again I don't expect him to be saying "Let's use these recordings you illegally made."
    Quote Quoting MikeIke
    Should I get her to admit to it, and is it worth trying to prove adultery?
    Not if it means going to jail.

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