I just wanted to come back and say to all those that thought I was worse off mentally than my ex that I had a psych eval in jail and the only thing they found was
Derealization, which is apparently a quite normal symptom of my panic disorder.
I was served with a Temporary Protective Order my ex got on behalf of my child as soon as I got out. In the permanent hearing, the judge said he was going to "give me another shot" to be a parent, but that I'm "on thin ice." He did not grant the permanent order, so I get a chance to be a part of my child's life...even though it is still supervised visits.
I just really didn't like the way I left things on here since everyone got so mad at me and I wanted to show that some of the extreme comments I got were unmerited.