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  1. #1

    Default Teenager Wants to Move In With Friends

    My question involves guardianship in the State of: Texas
    My parents are divorced and I live with my mom. My sister is turning 18 this month and I am 15. My dad lives with his parents because he is a truck driver and doesn't need a permanent house. My dads side of the family does not know me and I don't know them. All I know is that I can't live with my dad because their house isn't financially stable enough to take care of another person. My mom and my sister have been fighting since my parents got divorced 8 or 9 years ago. Things have been getting even more heated between them and my mom has been taking her anger out on me, yelling at me and degrading me and making me uncomfortable and fearful of coming home from school every day. My sister moved into my dads house and they realized it didn't work out, they don't have the money, so my sister moved back in.
    My sister is a lesbian and got a girlfriend that she is very close to. The girlfriend isn't allowed in my house but gives my sisters rides everywhere and my mom doesn't approve of what they do. So again my mom takes all her anger out on me every time my sister leaves the house. Well, recently my sister moved back in and my mom and sister claimed they had resolved their problems when, in reality, they hadn't. The very same weekend they got into a fight where my sister broke into the house by breaking a window to take her things while also punching a hole into the wall and breaking glass throughout the house. Me and my mom cried a lot after this happened and my mom told me to be strong for her because she couldn't do it for herself. This is unfair to me. I do not deserve to carry the emotional stress of my mother, who is in terrible health. I fear she will be dying soon. Her family lives in Greece and everyone in her family is losing their house because of the economy there. It seems as though all of my family is incapable of taking care of me. I make almost perfect grades and I do not do drugs, I'm a good person and I deserve a happy childhood. I have had a girlfriend for over two years and our families used to be great friends, but since this insane and unsafe drama has started her family has not trusted her being in my house, so I'm only allowed over there at her house. Their family loves me like I'm a part of their family and I feel like my only opportunity to salvage what's left of my childhood is to stay with them.
    I don't know how my mom will react to my feelings, but she claims she wants the best for me and the best for me doesn't lie in her arms. My girlfriends mom might agree to taking me in, but how? How can we make this happen? Please help me everyone. I'm in the process of getting a job and am great at managing money, time, and homework. I know I can't just leave. I need your help please reply back. I live in fear of my sister and mother every day because of my sister being over aggressive and my mom slapping me every now and then. What do I do? I will do anything. Emancipation? That seems the best for me because I feel like I'm smart enough to live with my girlfriends parents and my job will allow me to help them pay for keeping me there and gas and car insurance for a car to take me to and from work. Does that count as showing at court that I can be financially stable? Please help me and answer my questions. Thank you everyone.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Louisville, KY
    Posts
    1,877

    Default Re: My Safety is in Question, Looking for Options

    No. If you're truly in fear for your safety, call cps. But honestly, a slap every once in a while will probably not cross the line into an abusive situation, where they could step in and help. They may talk to your mom and sister though, and put them on notice that someone is watching.

    Emancipation isn't an option for you.

  3. #3

    Default Re: My Safety is in Question, Looking for Options

    It's not my mom slapping me that I'm in fear of. It's my sister breaking in every week. She broke down our front door last time. And my mom is too scared to do anything about it. I'm sorry if you tell me I can't do anything, but all I can tell you is that I'm uncomfortable living here. This isn't safe for me and I don't live a normal childhood. When I come home and eat dinner and shower and do homework every night until 11, my mom gets angry and verbally abuses me that I don't devote myself to helping her because she's sick. She almost died in January. The emotional stress coming from this house being put on me has given me thoughts of suicide, going though this day after day. I can't handle all of this.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I see my girlfriends family and how they accept me and let me be my own person around them, it makes me believe that I've never been able to be my own person. I've been raised to take care of my mom, she's too sick to take care of me.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Louisville, KY
    Posts
    1,877

    Default Re: My Safety is in Question, Looking for Options

    Being uncomfortable isn't a reason to emancipate you. If it were, every teenager in America would already be emancipated.

    It's nice that you have friends that love you. Hold onto that.

    You may want to talk to your school counselor about your feelings of anxiety and your depression.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: My Safety is in Question, Looking for Options

    Brian, you're 15.

    There is only one state which will emancipate a 15 year old, and it's not Texas. Therefore you're automatically disqualified.

    Please, as has been advised, contact child services if you're feeling abused. I'm sorry hon - I truly am. But emancipation is just not an option for you.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    6,808

    Default Re: My Safety is in Question, Looking for Options

    Has your mom filed police reports about your sister breaking in? If not, YOU might want to consider it. Or calling the cops the next time they have a huge fight.

    You do need to talk to your school counselor. And Child Protective is still an option....

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    24,521

    Default Re: My Safety is in Question, Looking for Options

    First of all, at 15 the state of Texas will not emancipate you under any circumstances whatsoever.

    At 16, the only way Texas will consider emancipation is if you are already living independently and self-supporting. That does NOT mean living with a friend and paying them a token rent. If you are not ALREADY (which means WITH permission) living independently the state will not even consider your petition.

    At 17, the requirement that you already be living independently before you file is removed, but you still have to show the judge WITH PROOF that you are capable of paying 100% of your own support. That means pay stubs, rent receipts, utility bills, grocery receipts, insurance policies in your name (or at the very least with your name on them, and proof that you've made the payments) etc.

    Living with a friend is simply not going to happen unless you have parental permission. No matter how many but-what-ifs you come up with.

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