Mother Left for a Year

[Kris87]

Its not irrevelent to me. If for some reason I lose primiary custody of my daughter, I need to make sure she is being taken care of. I cant and wont let her sleep on the floor or share an uncomfortable bed that she says she cant sleep in. I want all my ducks in the row to make sure that everything points that her current conditions are the best.

[Dogmatique]

It's irrelevant as far as the courts are concerned.

Look, Dad. Mom is going to get - at the very least - visitation. She'll be allowed to co-sleep. You can't stop that - and honestly, it just does. not. matter. at this stage in the game.

[Kris87]

I have already given her visitation. Every Tuesday night and every other weekend. I tried inviting her along on special family outings but she ruined them by starting arguments and storming off when she didn't get her way upsetting my daughter. I am not worried about visitation. I am worried about the well-being of my daughter in the off-chance that her mother wins primary custody.

[Dogmatique]

I hate to be the one to say this, but if she's fit enough for visitation, she's fit enough for full custody.

Seriously, you're over-thinking this.

[llworking]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Michigan

My soon to be ex-wife left for a year and moved to Rhode Island for a job position. I filed for divorce through the legal aids office a few months later. Before the divorce was finalized, she lost her job and house. She was then forced to move back to Michigan. Now she is trying to fight me for the custody of my 6 year old daughter to whom I have taken care of now for the previous 14 months. She is also trying to get something for the house and car I drive but I am not as worried about that. Is there a chance of me losing primary custody of my daughter.

I am going to address only the bolded since Dogmatique has addressed the child custody issues. Despite the fact that mom left and moved to another state for a year she is still entitled to her fair share of the marital assets. If the house you live in and the car you drive were purchased during the marriage, then she is entitled to a share in the equity of both of those items. She is also responsible for her fair share of any marital debts as well.

[aardvarc]

If her income cant be held against her, then what can?

Mom's own actions will work against her. You've really no reason to look for mud to sling (as Doggie noted, it'll get your hands dirty too).

The two big factors, both of which work in your favor, are that (a) mom left the child behind with you, meaning she was perfectly comfortable with you being a capable parent, and the court will take that at face value, and (b) you've been the child's primary caretaker for over a year.

Courts dislike shaking up a child's life unless their safety, security, health, or mental health are in danger. Mom leaving pretty much gave you a machine gun, and now she's coming to court with rocks. Unless you've got some major issues that you haven't disclosed here, such as having sex offender parties at your home, being a documented drug user, having a history of DUI with the children in the car, etc. then mom really has nothing to stand upon to convince a court that a change of custody is in the children's best interest.