Do I Have Grounds to Ask Judge for Supervised Visitation

[worriedmommy]

Mr. knowitall, you are correct in what had happened with the jurisdiction issue. On the other hand that is not what I told my ex. I forseen an issue with being able to follow through with that visit and I did everything in my power to make up for me not being able to hold up my end of the order. The court order also states that we are to come to agreements on visitation. I wasn't trying to disallow his time. Sometimes life happens and for that visit I was simply unable to do what the court order was saying, in that case we should both be grown ups and come up with a solution together instead of doing everything we can just to file contempt on the other. The amicus attorney ended up talking to him for 2 days explaining how finacially difficult the visits are on me expecially without recieving any child support that was ordered, he ended up reconsidering. He gave up two visits so I gave him 9 days straight to make up. I never canceled or even said I canceled the visit, just saw a problem and tried to get a solution.

tex11, when we got the order in 2007 we all lived in TX. He knew of my out of state move and so did the court before the judge gave the order so the court gave him the option for when that happens to choose 1 weekend a month instead of every 1st, 3rd, and 5th. He chose to keep it the later. He is responsible for picking her up at my house at begining and I am responsible for picking her up at his house at the end.(6pm is the pickup/dropoff time) When he has her I am responsible for pickup and dropoff. He refused, until recently, to even get my daughter on a flight. I had to have my sister (who lives 30min from him) pick her up at 6pm and no earlier and get her on a flight. My daughter would not get home on a school night until 11pm. I have tried to get ex to pick her up earlier so i can get her on an earlier flight but he insists on sticking to the court order dates and times. He does not work and recieves ssdi and has the time to come get her earlier. These visits are really hard on my daughter and traveling all the time is too. I pay anywhere from $300-$600 a month in travel expenses and I am sure he pays around the same but when flights go up he just rents a car, I cant because she has school and I have work in the am.

From what my lawyer told me the judge and amicus attorney was not happy with him when they found out he took our daughter to sea world on vacation and paid nothing in child support when he recieved his lump sum from ssdi benifits.

I feel like this is my chance to do my best to provide and ensure safety for my daughter even during visits. I feel that if I do not at least ask for supervised then i did not do my best to ensure her safety. I am scared to ask for supervised because I do not want to jepordize my current standing with the judge, but on the other hand it is my responsibility to provide safety for my daughter and right now I am concerned.

[tex11]

To answer your original question, the evidence you presented here is legally insufficient for the court to order supervised visitation. As to the whys of that, your attorney can explain it to you.

[worriedmommy]

I kinda figured that would be said, they like to wait until she is seriously injured before they will recognize a danger... Just hope it wont be too late for her.

[worriedmommy]

Turns out no waiting needed... my daughter has been sexually abused at her fathers house. She came back from her dads sunday with this information. Makes me sick how you can tell people about something but nobody wants to believe you untill they see it for themselfs. At least I don't have to send her back and I know now he can no longer hurt her, although she will be scared for life. Pretty much I have won this custody battle and I will probably get everthing I want in court. And both him and his son will be prosecuted.

[Dogmatique]

Turns out no waiting needed... my daughter has been sexually abused at her fathers house. She came back from her dads sunday with this information. Makes me sick how you can tell people about something but nobody wants to believe you untill they see it for themselfs. At least I don't have to send her back and I know now he can no longer hurt her, although she will be scared for life. Pretty much I have won this custody battle and I will probably get everthing I want in court. And both him and his son will be prosecuted.

I think I'm going to be sick.

And likely not for the reasons YOU are thinking.

[mmmagique]

I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you will be setting up counseling for your dd.

It's not that "no one wants to believe you until they see for themselves", it's that, by law, we aren't allowed to assume something is happening until there is proof. That's for everyone's protection.

[worriedmommy]

Thank you mmmagiue. She has been in counsling so we will be meeting with her regular counslor. Evedently this is something that has been happening since before May and my dd has been afraid to tell anyone, even counselor. I had to take her to children's hospital for a physical exam, head to toe. This has been very hard to digest but my dd is going to be ok. Children's hospital is very good at working with her. This is something that I am sure no mother would ever want to go through, or see their daughter go through. I am going to start counseling to cause I have just been so upset. I have been talking with CPS and police in both states and lawyers. And I am sorry about my post, I was just upset that my dd has to go through all of this.

dogmatique, I really don't understand your post.

[FatherWhoWon]

Pretty much I have won this custody battle and I will probably get everthing I want in court. And both him and his son will be prosecuted.

Can't speak for Dogmatique, but I can speculate. I, for one, was hung up on this. If your daughter was truly abused, why would "winning" even be a word that comes to your mind at all? Your post has a smug tone that makes it half-seem like you are glad this happened so that now you can "win" and punish dad.

I hope you are not real, and your story is made up. I hope that you as a mother with this type of attitude, nor a daughter who has been hurt, nor a father who allegedly has been harming a child, are real.

[Dogmatique]

Can't speak for Dogmatique, but I can speculate. I, for one, was hung up on this. If your daughter was truly abused, why would "winning" even be a word that comes to your mind at all? Your post has a smug tone that makes it half-seem like you are glad this happened so that now you can "win" and punish dad.

I hope you are not real, and your story is made up. I hope that you as a mother with this type of attitude, nor a daughter who has been hurt, nor a father who allegedly has been harming a child, are real.

You got it, Dad.

[worriedmommy]

Well that is just sick... sick in the head to accuse me of doing that to my daughter... to think that I am happy this happened??? INSAINE There may be some sorry excuses for mothers out there that might of done something like this but I am not one of them. Tell me just how I would "make up" physical evidence collected by the hospital. I didn't need any of this to happen for me to "win" in court. I said that because I mentioned in a previous post I would let people know how it turned out. You both make me want to just puke... This forum has been about the legalities of a case and not emotion. Now that I was short and to the point you want to throw that in my face too? SICK... guess there are the few people that just have to take something and turn it around to suit their sick thinking and judgement about somebody.

It is not my job to "punish" dad... I think the authorities got that covered. I would never use my daughter to punish dad and I would NEVER put my daughter through something like this over winning in court nor would I be happy or half happy about this happening to her. I was just simply being short and to the point of what was going to happen in court.

I am glad however that it is now known what has been going on over there. I am one of the few parents that ever even find out that this happens to their children because often too many times children never say anything to anybody. I am so proud of my dd for having the strength to come out with the abuse. And now she doesn't have to be hurt anymore and can start the healing process.

The attitude you are protraying I have... no... its not real... Its not the way you put it at all... that is just wrong and sick. But what has happened to her, is real. Its not fair or right for a child to go through this at all. In no way have I been happy about this happening to her. I have been torn up inside, I do my best to hold things together for her. Its hard for me to do anything without breaking dodwn and crying. The pain is inbarable... I have felt angry, sad, hurt, guilty, depressed, overwhelmed with emotions I cant even explain towards this happening to her but happy... thats just sick... I hope you do puke... you are really inconsiderate to tell a mother that is going through all this what you have... and did I mention.. SICK.