My question involves criminal law for the state of: New York, but generally applicable nationwide.

So I was shopping for groceries. There are a lot of us I had to shop for, and the cart was overflowing so I accidentally forgot about one item I'd stuck in the undercarriage of the cart for lack of space within. I proceeded to leave the store, at which point one of the store security guys pointed out the unpaid item. So I went back and paid for it.

No back rooms, no charges, no civil demands, no trespass orders.

So why come I got off so easy when so many other people are saddled with thousands of dollars of demands and fees and costs for the same thing?

Well, for one thing, I wasn't actually shoplifting. Oh, sure, a moment of neglect in one trip of many led me past the registers with unpaid merchandise, so I may have committed the offense of shoplifting in the strictest legal sense; what I meant was that I forgot the item, I didn't "forget" the item.

Regulars here will often point out that the law gives substantial leeway to store LPs to stop suspected thieves. However, regardless of what the law technically says, store security will be extremely cautious. The value of the item they're pretty sure they saw you pocket or have a hunch you walked out with is a lot less than the PR disaster and/or lawsuit of busting an innocent customer.

So if you've been caught shoplifting this time, odds are that store security has almost caught you before, but decided not to confront you because they weren't certain enough to risk it.

And even if you haven't stolen there before, store security staff are not stupid. They can tell when someone is acting off; they can detect the furtive motions as you switch the price tags, they can spot the tells of someone hoping to get away with theft. And they can also identify a regular customer, trying to make a truly massive purchase, who genuinely forgot about one item in a full cart on one of many trips. Just for starters, the item I forgot to pay for was sitting in the base of a store-provided shopping cart, blazingly obvious to everyone but the person behind the cart. I had accidentally concealed the item from myself, and no one else. Because, you see, people who shop use shopping carts for unpaid merchandise. People who shoplift use their pockets, purses, or the bags normally used for paid merchandise. Honestly ask yourself, do honest shoppers pocket merchandise they haven't paid for? I can't think of any reason why they would.

Remember, the warning above the post box advises you to protect your anonymity. As long as you obey that warning, your post will not be tied back to you. So if you want good advice, try to state all the facts of your case. Trying to convince us that you weren't really shoplifting, or that you honestly just forgot about the item you were totally intending to pay for when this is patently not the case will only lower the quality of the advice you receive. We're not the judge; we're not the cop; we're not on your jury. If you want advice that applies to you and applies to your situation, then describe your situation truthfully. If you admit to brazen shoplifting, we might not give you the answer you want to hear, but if you insist it was all an innocent mistake, the advice you get will be inapplicable to your situation. You wouldn't lie to your own lawyer; if you've decided to seek advice from us, don't lie to us.

And we're not stupid either. Some of the regulars here are cops or LPs and all of us have seen enough shoplifting questions that the inconsistencies in your story will be obvious.