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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
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    228

    Default Can a Stepparent Attend a Child's School Activities if the Mother Objects

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: MN

    Hello. My questions involves the Step-mom. She has been step-mom for two years now. I want to attend a school activity with my child and have some one-on-one time if EX won't be there. It is on my parenting day. We (ex and I) have joint 50/50 custody. The Ex says if step-mom wants to attend, she can attend (even if HE will not be there). I am always involved in school activities with my child. I allowed step mom to attend a few functions in the past but it caused some issues. So now, I am requesting she not attend. Ex says she can attend whether he is there or not. I can see her wanting to attend or I would say it was ok IF I was not able to go, but I am able to go. Also, since she has her own children (one at the same school) I do not know why she wouldn't want to be attending these functions with that child. I understand we have blended families, but shouldn't
    EX and Step-mom respect my wishes for me to spend the time during a school activity with just my child? Or is step mom legally able to go to these activities against my wishes? I would not bring a third party if my ex requested against it?
    Thank you for your time.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    38,867

    Default Re: Is a Step-Mom Allowed Alone to a School Activity if the Mom Requests Her Not to B

    basically, you have no right to control another person's activities unless you are in control of the venue where the activities are being held. If this is a public school, I could attend and watch your child's activities at the school.

    You have no obligation to allow the step parent to interact with your child though.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    228

    Default Re: Is a Step-Mom Allowed Alone to a School Activity if the Mom Requests Her Not to B

    This is at a public school and it is an activity where you sit with your child and read a book and have breakfast together before school starts.
    So I do not have to allow her to sit next to us or follow us around? I don't want to cause any problems, I just don't understand why I can't just spend one-on-one time with my child without having third party interference (especially if the EX won't even be there). I wouldn't go to my step child's school activity if the mom requested me not to so she could spend one-on-one time with her child? I don't care if step-mom goes and is with her own child; that is her right. But I want my own time alone with my child.....not my child, her and her child.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    38,867

    Default Re: Is a Step-Mom Allowed Alone to a School Activity if the Mom Requests Her Not to B

    You do not have to allow the step parent to interact with your child. You cannot prevent the step parent from engaging in the general activity. That is controlled by the school.

    Don't get me wrong; I'm not disagreeing with you or your desire to have some time with your child. I only caution you from attempting to control the other person in any way as you do not have that right.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    24,521

    Default Re: Is a Step-Mom Allowed Alone to a School Activity if the Mom Requests Her Not to B

    If you are looking for a law that says a stepparent cannot attend a school event if the other parent doesn't want her to, you're not going to find one. It doesn't exist.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    228

    Default Re: Is a Step-Mom Allowed Alone to a School Activity if the Mom Requests Her Not to B

    Ok. The activity is before school, on my parenting day. I want the child dropped off at my house in the AM before school, like any other day on my parenting day.
    Ex says step-mom will take child to school THAT day because she will be attending this school activity too (with her own child) so she will just bring ours and we can all go together (without dad). I am requesting that since dad won't even be there, I want alone time: one-on-one time with my child at the school activity.
    First--- legally, if he doesn't drop of the child at my house before school, like our order states, he is in contempt, right?
    Second---Yes, she can be at the school with her own child, I don't care about that. BUT legally, I am not obligated to let her sit with me and my child (causing unwanted tension and stress). She has absolutely no legal ties to the child.
    I don't know if it is a law I am looking for? I guess just to know if legally I am obligated to let her be a part of MY child's activity with us? She has caused problems in the past, and this is why I have started requesting she not attend certain activities.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    OH10
    Posts
    17,019

    Default Re: Is a Step-Mom Allowed Alone to a School Activity if the Mom Requests Her Not to B

    Your child will be aware you are snubbing the other adult and remember accordingly.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    OH10
    Posts
    17,019

    Default Re: Is a Step-Mom Allowed Alone to a School Activity if the Mom Requests Her Not to B

    Sounds like it is time to have a sit down talk about co-parenting.

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