OP, if the rape was reported to authorities, that'll be an important element in the process of your husband completing an adoption - which would allow a name change. Hubby would file for adoption, put "unknown" for the father, and present a copy of the rape report to the court to show that identification of the father cannot be made (or that even WITH identification, now or at some future date, that the father should be excluded from the child's life).

If the rape wasn't reported to authorities, (perhaps out of fear of admitting to being 17 and participating in activities as a party that result in you passing out, like drugs or alcohol?) you're going to need an attorney. Without such a report, the court is going to be VERY unwilling to bless an adoption until you've made ALL reasonable attempts to identify and notify potential fathers and those attempts will need to be made and documented in a manner acceptable to the court.