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  1. #1

    Exclamation Suing Parents for Causing Mental Health Issues and Trauma

    My question involves public health law in the State of: California.

    I'm not 100% sure if this is the exact category this would fall under, but my post involves child abuse and assault as an adult among other things, and resulting psychological issues. I'm am currently still 19, and living with my parents, I am dependent on their income, and as desperately as I have tried, I have no been able to secure a job to escape this place. In my childhood/adulthood, I experienced I've experienced several issues in regards to my parents that I believe I should receive compensation for, and I was wondering if compensation for these things would be justified. This is including:

    Childhood Neglect
    • Being locked outside of the house in the backyard and forced to sleep in >100 degree temperatures without hydration while I had Mononucleosis.
    • Refusal from my parents to be taken to the doctor despite complaining of extreme pain (several occasions), difficulty breathing, passing out, negative effects of medication, not helping me get medical attention when I admitted to being suicidal (I will return to this topic in more depth under another branch).
    • Allowing my brother to physically/verbally assault both my sister and I repeatedly without seeking medical help for him.
    • Not medication/seeking medical attention for extreme fever (105 degrees).
    • Forcing us, as children, to eat McDonald's every day for a year, causing massive weight gain, and I believe subsequent long-term metabolism problems.
    • Both parents fighting with each other, then both leaving the truck running in the middle of the street, exiting the vehicle in a separate direction while leaving us in the back set (while none of us knew how to drive and were nowhere near home).
    • Kicking my brother, sister and I out of the house, telling us to leave, and locking the door while we were all underage, didn't have anywhere else to go, and didn't know what to do. My brother and sister all observed this, and after we eventually went to my neighborhood friend's house, told her mother our story while we continued to attempt to call my aunt (it was dark out at this point, and very cold), and 30 minutes to an hour later, received a threatening call from my mother saying we had 10 minutes to be home, otherwise we would be reported as run-aways.
    • On the way to school, my mom (who has epilepsy) said she was having a headache (which was a warning she always gave before she had a seizure). I asked her to pull over to the side of the road, which she refused to do, then had a grand mal seizure in 7am traffic, in a busy lane on the way to school. I had to jump onto the driver's side, sitting on top of her, move her feet away from the pedals and hands from the steering wheel and attempt to drive the car around the corner (I was 16 at the time, and it was on my way to class). After pulling the car to the side of the road and waiting for her to regain consciousness, I begged her to not continue driving, saying I would rather walk to school, but she started the car and drove again anyways, in a less than 5 minute period after she initially had the seizure...
    • My dad had continual affairs with many women on the internet, using a different persona, and for a long time, I was the only one who knew. This, I believe, was why he locked us outside during the Summer I had Mononucleosis, as he would pull the shades down while he said he was using the computer, and when we were in the house, turn the screen off whenever we approached him. I saw the conversations between him and other women first-hand, and I collapsed.

    Physical Abuse
    • Over time I was hit with shoes, belts, I had my hair pulled, I was pinched, and I was grabbed to the point of major bruising, shoved, smacked, leaving red marks.
    • On one occasion, after my dad was upset with my when I was younger for not having my room cleaned, he picked up my music stand and threw it at my head, leaving a hole in the wall, and the music stand dented. If it had hit me I would have certainly had physical head trauma, possibly have died.
    • My mom would pick my acne all over my body against my will and corner me, preventing me from escaping when I was younger, sometimes threatening further punishment if I attempted to leave. It usually hurt so badly I cried.
    • My mom would also brush my hair with such force that it ripped my hair out, and I would cry ever since I was little telling her to stop, but my crying would not lessen the intensity in which she "brushed" with.

    Emotional Abuse
    • Attempting to force me to throw my cats out of my house (the things most valuable to me) as a means of punishment, threatening to get my cats euthanized/throwing them out as a punishment, loading a cat into the transportation box while making me hold it in the car and telling me that we were taking the cat to get euthanized and that it was my fault.
    • Both parents blaming me for the cause of the other parent leaving the house
    • Both parents blaming me for being the sole cause of all of our family's troubles
    • Both parents mocking my brother and I for our mental illnesses, my mother saying things such as, I quote, "I wasn't the one in the loony bin!" (psychiatric ward) in reference to me having to be place in the psychiatric ward for suicide attempts as a result of collective trauma.
    • Both parents blaming family monetary problems on me after undergoing necessary hospitalizations.
    • I approached my dad telling him I was having suicidal thoughts, and he told me I wouldn't do it, and then gave me knife (despite knowing I had a past of self-injury) and dared me to commit suicide.
    • I approached my mom telling her I was having suicidal thoughts, and she told me that I was just doing being over-dramatic, and was too much of a coward to kill myself. (I had already made attempted more than once at this point)
    • Both of my parents constantly telling me I was selfish, lazy, crazy, and worthless.
    • Both parents mocked me for crying, and would at that point continue to attack me emotionally further, with more put-downs and blame on several occasions.
    • Expecting me to forget things they had done to me, and to accept them forgiving me, only to return to the same behaviors they were apologizing for, over and over.
    • Constant yelling and arguing (I'm highly sensitive to sensory stimuli) to the point that I have had panic attacks.
    • My mom would think she heard me say something (she has hearing problems) that I didn't say, try to attack me, or demand that my dad punished me. If my dad claimed that her demand was unjustified, she would claim he was taking sides, and at times presented an ultimatum. Either he took her side, or left. She was the sole source of income of the family, and so because of this, I was punished often without reason.
    • My parents would intentionally try to embarrass me in front of my peers as punishment and bring up things they knew were sensitive to me in front of my friends, or otherwise reprimand me in public and even speak lies about me in public. One example of this was when my father was drunk and started verbally assaulting me in front of my best friend (who knew very much about how my parents had treated me growing up, and had herself been punished in our house by my mother) at a party. She can testify on my behalf in regards to this matter.

    Verbal Abuse
    • I have been called many, many things over the years by them, "Insane", "Crazy", "Heartless", "Bitch", "Idiot", "Pig", "Slob", "****ing Stupid", "Fat"

    Stealing of personal my possessions while I was a youth
    • My parents have often invaded my room without specific reason, and have stolen papers and journals I had written in, and told them not to touch. These were sorts of diaries, ways I could express myself without judgement in a house where if I tried to express my negative emotions, I would immediately be punished, and upon seizing those papers, threatened to show them to the psychologist to prove to them that I was "insane" and "sick", like my biological mother. I demanded they return these things that they took that I had written, and they refused.

    Sexual Abuse (?) I'm not sure if these things would qualify as sexual abuse or not, but I can say I felt like I was being invaded in a sexual manner. I also verbally told my parents to stop the behavior because it made me uncomfortable, and they didn't.
    • My dad would slap me on the butt in what seemed like a playful manner, but I didn't like it. I actually felt disgusting when he did that, and I told him to stop, but it's an action he still does to this day. I still hate it and feel disgusted.
    • When I was younger, my mom would locked me in the bathroom while I was naked and examine my genital areas for acne, and pick at them. It hurt so bad I was crying, and I told hurt it hurt and to stop, but she wouldn't. She would also threaten me with punishment if I tried to leave. I didn't like it at all. It felt like an EXTREME violation of personal areas. Thinking about it now, it's disgusting that she did that to me...

    Physically assaulted as a young adult
    • Around the end of October/Beginning of November of 2011, my father physically assaulted me while we were arguing. He grabbed my arm so hard, it left a huge bruise. I called the police, and somebody did answer, and I hysterically attempted to explain my situation. Unfortunately, however, no police officer showed up. I don't know why this is the case, but that's what happened... My call should still be on record.
    • There was another event where I wanted to call 911 using the house phone, but my father physically prevented me from using the house line to call 911. I have recently discovered this was a felony. I crossed the street that day in tears, and asked my neighbor if I could use her phone and tried to explain my situation, but she walked me back across the street instead. I was so scared of what my parents might do to me after that... This was the day I had a doctor's appointment for a sleep study, and my dad refused to take me because he was upset with me. He ended up taking me anyways, and at the sleep center, I told on of the people working there about what had happened. She asked me if I had anywhere else to go besides home, and because I didn't, I ended up returning home.

    evicted without prior notice as a young adult
    • Soon after the experience with my parents at the end of October/Beginning of November of 2011, there was another argument upon returning home from visiting a friend's house. This time, however, my parents kicked me out of the house. They had not given prior warning, and did not give me an option to stay. They told me to gather my belongings and leave; they didn't care if I didn't have money or a place to say. Hysterical again, I called my friend Corrie's mother who had just dropped me of, and she attempted to delegate with my parents and convince them to let me stay. Corrie and her friend Kat were there to witness this. Ultimately, I ended up going with Corrie's mom after collecting a few of my belongings, and slept over at their house. Corrie's mom called my parents the next day, and concluded based upon what they told her that they did not want me back. I was relocated soon after to a homeless shelter, where the counselors there advised me not to return home under any circumstance. There was a problem with this, however. I was required to take several medications, and some of my medications were low. After staying in a shed without ventilation or warm clothing the first night, I caught a cold. I was sick and I didn't know where or how to get medical attention. Eventually, a week later, my father contacted me, and seeing few options, I returned home in order to get medical care. I knew I would be stuck again, but I didn't see any other option that would help me recover physically, even if I would be in an abusive environment again.

    Product of Abuse
    I have many psychological issue the onsetted during, or after periods of high stress and abuse cause directly by my parents. I have been diagnosed with:
    • Post-traumatic Stress Disorder
    • Panic Disorder
    • Social Anxiety
    • OCD
    • ADD
    • Bi-polar NOS

    The product of these things were previous substance abuse as a coping mechanism, failing classes as a product of not being medicated, crippling suicidal depression that has led to several suicide attempts, some of which I was hospitalized for, several hospitalizations at the psychiatric ward, horrible memories of abuse that loop through my mind when something triggers it and makes me feel as if I'm reliving it over and over again, often feeling that because of the intensity of my symptoms, there is no reason to continue living, and that I will never be able to function normally or survive without relying on medications. I have panic attacks, I have extreme trust issues that prevent me from forming normal, healthy relationships with other people, and I live in torment because of these on a daily basis. These things effect every aspect of my life...

    As it stands, my parents continually make threats off and on that they will kick me out of the house again, knowing full-well that I have no place to go and no money. The reason I want to press charges and hopefully get some money compensation is not for revenge; it's for the sake of survival. If my parents kick me out and take me off of their insurance, I will have no way to pay for my medicine, no place to live, go into withdrawal, not be able to function, and potentially end up committing suicide. I do not believe I am well enough right now to maintain a job, as I still am crippled by social anxiety and experience episodes of depression so bad, I barely have the energy to get out of bed, and certainly don't have the energy to maintain myself on a consistent basis. I need a means of survival...

    Does my case seem strong enough that I should receive monetary compensation? I don't know what to do... I'm so scared...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Somewhere near Canada

    Default Re: Regarding Suing Parents for Instigated Mental Health Issues and Trauma

    You are a legal adult - is there a reason you cannot leave and support yourself?

    Without reading your novel, there is one question:

    How much PROOF of abuse is there? As in, how many convictions do they have? How many "founded" CPS investigations?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Toledo, OH

    Default Re: Regarding Suing Parents for Instigated Mental Health Issues and Trauma

    If we could sue our parents for being assholes, the courts would never be able to keep up. A lot of parents are assholes. But no, you have no grounds to sue them for compensation.

    When you were a child, abuse should have been reported to CPS. You were NOT sexually abused.

    As an adult - and you are an adult - your option is to pack it up and move it out. If you are unable to do so, you need to get yourself into counseling, keep your head down and follow your parents' rules, and as soon as you're self-supporting, get out of there.

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