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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    16

    Unhappy Effect on Custody of Joining the Military

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: CA

    I am debating joining the military. I reside in NY state and have 50% legal custody and 95% physical custody of my son. That can only change under a "significant change in circumstances" per our custody agreement. If I was to join the service would that put me at risk of losing my son?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: If I Join the Military

    If you are a single parent wanting to enlist in any branch other than the NG or Reserves, it is a requirement that you transfer custody.

    A single parent with custody cannot enlist.
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    16

    Default Re: If I Join the Military

    I have been told that I am allowed to join with one dependent. Does this mean I still have to transfer custody? Also what happens if I was to remarry......do I still lose custody?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: If I Join the Military

    Please read this

    You cannot transfer your custody to your new husband. Dad would be able to obtain temp custody very easily.

    (Out of interest, is there a reason why Dad shouldn't have custody?)
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    16

    Default Re: If I Join the Military

    There's no legal reason no. He gave me the custody I have. The Navy's website says you can enlist as a single parent with no more than 2 dependents but the link you sent me to states otherwise. Is only be joining to support my son so obviously wouldn't want to lose him as a result. I'm guessing there are no loopholes?

  6. #6

    Default Re: If I Join the Military

    The gist is that if supporting a child means LEAVING the child, then you'd be in no different situation than ANY non-custodial parent - meaning that the AVAILABLE parent would (and arguably SHOULD) get custody, and you'd be working to pay child support.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: If I Join the Military

    Yes, I read the Navy's website, OP.

    I believe they might be seeing a difference between having a "dependent", and having full custody. For example, a NCP is still a single parent technically, and can be seen as having a dependent if he has a child that he's supporting. But he doesn't have full custody. Hence he would likely be able to enlist.

    Have a chat with the recruiter though. Maybe things have changed/are changing (though I doubt it, and I do keep an eye on these things given that my #2 is a single parent in the Reserves).
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    16

    Default Re: Effect on Custody of Joining the Military

    Yeah the only thing that confuses me.is that the Navy's recruiting site says to talk to a recruiter about how you can join as a single parent. Maybe I should just go and talk to them and see what they say......can't hurt.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Effect on Custody of Joining the Military

    Certainly can't hurt to go have a chat with them, nope

    You do understand their point of view though, right? What happens if you're deployed? Dad's going to get kiddo anyway for that time, isn't he?
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    16

    Default Re: Effect on Custody of Joining the Military

    Dad would only get him if I have to give him. Right now he only has visitation so not sure if that would change

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