My question involves a marriage in the state of: new york

I'm currently stationed in Japan with my wife and 4 kids. She is a Japanese national with a social security number and green card. My home of record is NY. We co-own a home in Nebraska, which is currently being rented out until I can get station back there. We are ready to move on with our lives and plan on an uncontested divorce.

I have been serving for nearly 18 years and married for 16 of it.
We will share full joint custody of our children.
She will receive half of my retirement pension and TSP.
I have a NY state drivers license; she has a Nebraska license.
We own a home in Nebraska and a truck registered there.
She's filed Nebraska state taxes in previous years.

My questions are:

Where should we file?
What is the usual turnaround for an uncontested filing?
Do we have to sell our home if someone is renting under a 3 year lease?
Can we sell the house at the termination of the lease?
How can we relinquish her from any financial liability of the house?