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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
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    2

    Red face Changing My Sons' Last Name to My Current Husband's Last Name

    My question involves name change laws in the State of: Oklahoma I had two children ages now 12 and 10. On their birth certificate it has no father typed in it. My ex boyfriend never married as it was I found out he was already married and they never persued a divorce and now 12 years later they are still married and he has now a total of 4 kids and counting. He is in prison waiting deportation due to non violent felonies. He has only paid child support 2 I believe as it has been many years I do remember the last one was in the sum of $13 yes $13. I have been married for 7 years now and my husband has raised these boys and they call him dad they are his kids. He changed their diapers, stayed up when they were sick so now my questions are:::

    1) Do I have to notify the father since he is no longer a resident and has had all his resident rights removed?
    2) Do I have to have a lawyer if all parties are agreeable to the situation?
    3) And how do I start the process?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    38,867

    Default Re: Changing My Two Sons Last Name to My Current Husbands Last Name

    On their birth certificate it has no father typed in it.
    but has paternity been established?


    1) Do I have to notify the father since he is no longer a resident and has had all his resident rights removed?
    how has he had his rights removed? You have said nothing that would suggest that is the case.

    2) Do I have to have a lawyer if all parties are agreeable to the situation?
    You never have to have a lawyer but especially with adoptions, it is always a good idea.

    3) And how do I start the process?
    does the father ever see his children? If so, when was the last time?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
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    2

    Default Re: Changing My Two Sons Last Name to My Current Husbands Last Name

    No paternity has never legally been established he has never denied them when it came to child support.

    He is in Pennsylvania federal prison. he has been deported once already and made his way back ilegally and now waiting to go back. I still talk to his mom and she told me this. he was here on a green card residency and got it taken away do to DUIS and Drugs.

    The last time my sons have seen there biological father was 8 years ago and never since then his mom has all my phone numbers, my address and she is even on my facebook friends page. So he has had all the resources to get a hold of me he chooses not to.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    38,867

    Default Re: Changing My Two Sons Last Name to My Current Husbands Last Name

    so, you will be required to notify possible fathers of the pending action to terminate paternal rights and to adopt the children. If he contests it, then you can deal with his actual issues such as abandonment..

    Oh, wait, a person that is not a legal father cannot legally abandon children that aren't theirs, legally.

    You need to to through the process and that is going to include attempting to notify who you believe is the father and give him a chance to claim their parentage.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
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    35,894

    Default Re: Changing My Two Sons Last Name to My Current Husbands Last Name

    Here's my advice.

    Go and speak with a local attorney. A stepparent adoption is likely going to be a more sensible choice. You can have the name change done at the same time.

    Dad will have little chance of contesting such an adoption, but you should still have an attorney help you just to make sure everything is done the right way.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: Changing My Two Sons Last Name to My Current Husbands Last Name

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
    View Post
    Dad will have little chance of contesting such an adoption, but you should still have an attorney help you just to make sure everything is done the right way.
    there is no dad. Of course we have mom's version of the situation. Dad's could be very different.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Somewhere near Canada
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    Default Re: Changing My Two Sons Last Name to My Current Husbands Last Name

    Quote Quoting jk
    View Post
    there is no dad. Of course we have mom's version of the situation. Dad's could be very different.

    In all honesty, it really doesn't seem to matter. If putative father is about to be deported, the court is incredibly unlikely to deny a stepparent adoption.

    And in OP's state, paternity does not necessarily need to be established and there do not need to be court orders in place before the stepparent adoption can go ahead.

    (I'm not saying this is fair to putative Dad - but he honestly doesn't stand much chance if OP is telling the truth)

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