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  1. #1

    Default Can He Propose to Make a Change to the Parenting Plan

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Washington

    My exH is asking for mediation and has made a proposed parenting plan. Now the background: We have a parenting plan that was created as part of our divorce and he has exercised his visitation once in the past 18 months, by his choice. He moved out of state *actually from state to state, not even telling me where he was or for how long* and never visited or asked for a different plan to suit the situation (of him being out of state).

    NOW he is back in state and is asking for a modification to the parenting plan. I don't understand the grounds for this. Not just based on the fact that he hasn't even been using the time that he HAD avaliable to him and is now asking for more time, but the fact that we have a standing local parenting plan that is just fine that a judge issued years ago.

    Am I looking bad if I don't agree to go to mediation? Does he have grounds to even ask for a change to the plan (ask for MORE time!)? I don't even really understand why this is even an option for him to be asking such a thing...

    HELP!

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Default Re: Can He Propose to Make a Change to the Parenting Plan

    What makes you think he's not permitted to ask?

    Yes, you'd look bad if you refused to go to mediation. He's trying to do this in a manner that is not meant to be combative or upsetting to your child. If you refuse to go to mediation, he can drag you to court, and the judge can ORDER you to go to mediation. Get dragged into court enough, and you're looking at some big expenses.

    He's the child's father. Even if YOU hate his grody guts, your child still has a right to a relationship with Dad.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Can He Propose to Make a Change to the Parenting Plan

    I totally get that. I know it doesn't matter how I feel about him as a person, and I agree that kiddo has a right to a relationship with Dad, in fact, I'd welcome the help!

    But when Dad comes when it's convenient or has nothing else going on, then doesn't come for 1.5 years while he does whatever he was doing and then comes back and asks for MORE time it is just messy making IMO.

    Also, I was under the impression that there were only a few reasons to make a change to a parenting plan and I don't see any of them applying to this situation. Also, I don't not want him to see kiddo, I just want him to prove that he will actually use the time he was originally given before even thinking about paying for mediation and a lawyer and getting more time. You know, actually show up when it's your time (a quite small amount as is) for a while before you ask for more time.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Default Re: Can He Propose to Make a Change to the Parenting Plan

    Quote Quoting strawberrygirl
    View Post
    I totally get that. I know it doesn't matter how I feel about him as a person, and I agree that kiddo has a right to a relationship with Dad, in fact, I'd welcome the help!

    But when Dad comes when it's convenient or has nothing else going on, then doesn't come for 1.5 years while he does whatever he was doing and then comes back and asks for MORE time it is just messy making IMO.
    Messy? Yeap. Not the fairest thing to the child? Yeap. But legal? Absolutely.


    Also, I was under the impression that there were only a few reasons to make a change to a parenting plan and I don't see any of them applying to this situation. Also, I don't not want him to see kiddo, I just want him to prove that he will actually use the time he was originally given before even thinking about paying for mediation and a lawyer and getting more time. You know, actually show up when it's your time (a quite small amount as is) for a while before you ask for more time.
    You can't force him to turn up and use his parenting time.

    So, what EXACTLY is he asking for? What are your current orders versus what he's requesting?

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