Results 1 to 5 of 5
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    2

    Default How to Recover Custody

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Ohio

    My child will be 12 this month. In the middle of June, her dad took custody for the summer, and they went on a vacation out-of-state from his residence in TX. After staying with relatives for 2 weeks, dad left her there with the relatives (that she didn't know prior to this point) while he returned to TX. He intends to leave her there for the remainder of the summer. Initially he refused to provide me with the address and phone of her location, but 2 weeks after arriving there I now have that info.

    My child has indicated that she does not want to stay there. She wants to go home, preferably to me, but she would be ok going to her dad's too. I have contacted my attorney, and he is trying to get a voice with the court, but they "don't have any open court dates". She is being made to share a bed with a full-grown woman who mistreats her verbally. My ex will not discuss the matter with me, and hasn't provided a reason for this situation.

    Legally is there anything I can do to take back custody for the remainder of the summer?


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    424

    Default Re: Recover Custody

    Do you have a right of first refusal in your court order?

  3. #3

    Default Re: Recover Custody

    If you know where she is, you can go GET her. Relatives that dad left her with don't have legal custody...you do. However, there's nothing illegal or inherently wrong with dad leaving her with his relatives during his visitation time, and unless there's specific language in any custody/visitation orders that dictate otherwise, then so long as the child is being fed, clothed, sheltered, and otherwise cared for, the court isn't likely to have an issue with dad having her spend part of his visitation time with family. If he leaves her with them BEYOND his visitation time, THEN you've got grounds to complain that the order isn't being followed. If dad were leaving her with a NON-family member, such as a babysitter, you'd have more of a postition to argue from - but courts don't disapprove of parents fostering relationships between their children and extended family (and you know that's how dad will paint this). Bottom line? If dad has court ordered visitation, then HE gets to decide where and how the spends the time allotted to him. Unless you can show that the child is somehow in danger, I don't see a court interfering for this summer. If dad's got a HABIT of not spending some considerable portion of time his with the child, THEN you can petition the court for the future, but I'm not seeing a reason for the court to intervene at this point.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    2

    Default Re: Recover Custody

    PQN: We are on a long-distance plan, so I don't think I have it.

    aardvarc: I'd travel the 600mi in a heartbeat if I knew I couldn't be arrested, or that the dad wouldn't retaliate in some way. I'm nervous that if I did that he'd use it somehow to get full custody. Could he? He's abandoned her there, thousands of miles away from where he is now.

    {{climbing up on soapbox}}
    And it seems to me that just because other kids are in worse situations than my child (drugs, abuse, etc.) doesn't give the courts the right to ignore the predicament that my child is in. Emotionally she has been abused and abandoned by her dad.
    {{climbing down from soapbox}}

    sigh. I am just very worried by all the calls from my sobbing child... and feeling helpless to do anything for her.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Recover Custody

    Quote Quoting LoveMyDD
    View Post
    aardvarc: I'd travel the 600mi in a heartbeat if I knew I couldn't be arrested,
    Getting arrested takes committing a crime. Asking local police in the community where the child is to accompany you to dad's relative's home to collect your child is a-ok. The downside is that dad, who apparantly has visitation, has the legal authority to leave the child with his relatives, so even IF you show up with police, it'll be up to those family members to comply with the REQUEST to turn the child over. If they refuse, and there's no court order to the contrary, then police are highly unlike to get involved beyond simply making sure the encounter is peaceful, because it's a CIVIL, and not a CRIMINAL matter. Then you'd be stuck returning home, and with little to do except (a) wait until the end of dad's visitation time to see if he returns her home per the visitation order, and (b) be working with your attorney to draft a modification to the parenting plan that addresses the issue to see if the court will be willing to make a modification.

    or that the dad wouldn't retaliate in some way. I'm nervous that if I did that he'd use it somehow to get full custody. Could he?
    Sure he could. He's the father. He's got rights. One of those is that he is allowed to leave the minor with other competent caretakers during his time. Since those caretakers are family members, you risk the ire of the court and handing dad some nice legal ammo and an arguement that you're attempting to interfere with his right to parent his child during his time. Judges don't like that.

    I woulHe's abandoned her there, thousands of miles away from where he is now.
    Although I know you're emotionally involved here, that's NOT how the courts will see it. She's in the company of family. That's NOT "abandoned". That she doesn't LIKE or these family members very well doesn't create a legal issue.


    And it seems to me that just because other kids are in worse situations than my child (drugs, abuse, etc.) doesn't give the courts the right to ignore the predicament that my child is in. Emotionally she has been abused and abandoned by her dad.
    Unfortunately, this is the man that was chosen to be dad. That means that he has constitutionally protected rights to his children, and to parent them, even poorly, to the extent allowed by law. To a great extent, parents are legally ALLOWED to be emotionally abusive, and as noted above, the child has not been abandoned - she's just not happy with where she is (which is understandable, but doesn't create a LEGAL problem). The state, in the form of the courts, can't force him to be a good parent, can't force him to spend time with his child, or address many of the other issues that occur in cases such as this one. In short, the courts can't solve MOST "parenting problems" - what they CAN do is look at situations and approve or disapprove a modified parenting plan or visitation order - so work with an attorney to get something drafted and before the court.

    You should also discuss the issue of child support with your attorney. Quite frankly, a LOT of the time when situations like this arise, there is an element of money involved. Why? Look at it from dad's point of view - if he is allocated time by the courts, and doesn't use a substantial portion of that time, that can open the door for you to seek a modification of child support (asking him to pay more, since you have the child for more time than originally spelled out if he's not utlizing his visitation). So a non-custodial parent has a lot of motivation to do SOMETHING with the child, just to use up that time; if they don't want to spend the time with the child themselves, then leaving the child with family is often a completely acceptable option (to the court, even if not to the CP and the child). In other words, dad might be perfectly happy to send her back home, but isn't doing to based on his fear of NOT using up his time and getting whopped for a bigger child support payment in the future.


    sigh. I am just very worried by all the calls from my sobbing child... and feeling helpless to do anything for her.
    For this trip, there's little TO do, unless there's some indication that there is physical abuse occurring, that she's not being fed, etc. But the bottom line is that you're going to be co-parenting with dad for another 6 years, so if the time/money issue is contributing to the problem, you'll want to work towards some solution that is going to make both you and dad happy with the arrangement, and then get that agreement formalized by bringing it to the court.

    1. Sponsored Links
       

Similar Threads

  1. How to Recover a Judgment
    By angel48239 in forum Civil Procedure
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 08-01-2008, 10:17 AM
  2. Traffic Accidents: Can I Still Recover Damages?
    By roytbum in forum Accidents and Injuries
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 03-29-2008, 08:08 PM
  3. Bankruptcy Issues: How To Recover From Bankruptcy
    By 6ftsoccermom in forum Bankruptcy Law
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-12-2008, 08:41 PM
  4. Payment Disputes: How Can an Independent Contractor Recover Money Owed by a Client
    By TexasBandit in forum Independent Contractors
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 12-10-2007, 11:35 AM
  5. Security Deposits: Trying to Recover Deposit
    By midwestmess in forum Landlord-Tenant Law
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 08-24-2007, 01:27 PM
 
 
Sponsored Links

Legal Help, Information and Resources