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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7

    Default What to Do at a Meeting with CPS

    My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: California

    My wife and I have had behavioral problems with our oldest son. At times I have "potched" (spanked) him on his rear with an open hand. On one occasion I did push him into a wall and pinned him down for 30 seconds while he cooled down. My reaction to him was due to defiance and language. There were no injuries, bruises, or other physical effects. This was approximately three months ago.

    After this event, I wanted to get help for him as his attitude was getting worse and becoming uncontrollable. We got him help with a psychologist. After about 7 sessions or so, he called us into a conference. He said our child was severely depressed, and had been physically abused by me. He stated that he was required as a mandated reporter to report this to the local CPS.

    CPS interviewed my kids at school today. I haven't spoken to my children about what they revealed. During the interview with my two younger daughters, it was revealed that I spanked them and I pushed both and threatened to break my older son's arm (which I never did). She also stopped by my house and asked several questions to my wife outside our house and disclosed that she interviewed my kids at school.

    She scheduled a meeting with us for tomorrow morning. I am mortified. I do not feel I have abused my kids. I certainly did not cause physical harm to them.

    The CPS social worker stated that our meeting would last about 20 minutes. I am somewhat versed on what to say and what not to say. My wife did not witness any events.

    The psychologist stated to me that he believe the response by CPS would be mild at best.

    1) Do I admit to CPS that I have used corporal punishment as defined by CA law? Do I admit to anything?
    2) Should I secretly record our conversation with my iPhone? (is this legal?)
    3) What are the potential outcomes of this for me?
    4) Should I discontinue therapy with the psychologist? Could any additional information learned be used against me?

    I've never had any entanglements with the law.

    Thanks in advance..

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: CPS Meeting Tomorrow

    1. That's entirely up to you - nobody here can tell you what to do. Do you have an attorney? That should have been your first move.

    2. No. That's not legal. California requires both parties to consent.

    3. The case can be closed completely with no negative results or you can be found to have abused your child. The penalties vary, but for a first time and in the circumstance you describe I would imagine the penalty would not be overly severe. You may be told that you are not allowed to physically discipline you children at all.

    4. Again that's your decision.

    There is a very, very fine line between discipline and abuse. Maybe you're not aware that you're going too far?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7

    Default Re: CPS Meeting Tomorrow

    Dog,

    Thank you very much for your reply.

    Any other suggestions or opinions?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: CPS Meeting Tomorrow

    Honestly? I would have gotten an attorney immediately. CPS accusations aren't to be taken lightly.

    Three of your children have made accusations - that's going to be taken more seriously than only one child making a complaint. You also have the psychologist reports most likely - who determined that your son had been abused.

    How old are the kids?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7

    Default Re: CPS Meeting Tomorrow

    11, 8, 6

    Our conference is scheduled for 8:30a. Should I cancel, hire an attorney and reschedule? Do I tell them I will have representation?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: CPS Meeting Tomorrow

    Spanking an 11 year old is rarely warranted - at least that's the common stance taken by most experts in the field.

    You can try to reschedule, yes. You don't have to tell them anything. Legally, you don't have to let them in your house without a warrant. But be aware that non-compliance can result in the kids being removed temporarily.

    Is it fair? Not necessarily.

    But does it happen? Frequently.

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