My question involves a child custody case from the State of: California

Good morning / afternoon-

So after 8 years of somewhat amicable relations between my ex and I, things have gone south in hurry. Last August, I got married and while she had a lot more attitude than usual, I wasn't too worried. Around the Holidays, my new wife and I found out we were expecting and since then my ex and I have really bumped heads. Whereas before I could pick up my daughter 3 weekends a month and keep her for the majority of vacations, now she fights me on everything and (I believe) is trying to manipulate my daughter. I will send her Outlook calendars-so we are on the same page as far as visitation goes- and she will initially agree. When the time comes she will say she made plans and while she admits she initially agrees she says it doesn't matter and plans have changed. She will keep her for holidays and claim they have huge plans - which turn out to be just staying at home and sleeping while my daughter keeps herself entertained. My daughter tells me that many times there is nothing in the refrigerator and refuses to help her with her homework. She definitely harbors resentment and has crazy mood swings. I have come to the conclusion that it is time for a change and to stand up not just for myself, but for my daughter as well. I have many questions and I'm eager to learn:

1.) What should my first step be if I want to have a true, court approved custodial agreement?

2.) Her and I live 50 miles apart and I would like for us to meet halfway - is there any hope if I request this that I get it granted?

3.) What should my first step be if I would like to get custody of her?

4.) My support was doubled so I can't afford a lawyer - is this something I can do myself with enough study and hard work?

*** Funny enough, all of this has inspired me and I'm saving up money now to go back to college and become a paralegal with an emphasis on father's rights. Funny how life works out.


Thank you for all the help and I look forward to the answers!