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  1. #1

    Default What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a School Function or Sports Event

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: California

    I have a no visitation order against my son's father, which has been in place for 6 years. There had been a warrant issued prior to that, and has recently been erased and probation given to my son's father. He's been living out of state all these years, but is currently in town getting his legal issues resolved. He has asked me several times over the years to go against the order, including recently (after the warrant was removed), which I have refused until the order is changed. What can be done if he shows up to my son's sport/school events? As a spectator, not interfering with my son's performance or trying to talk to him, as well as if he tries to talk to him? I don't want to cause my son any emotional pain by seeing his dad and not being able to talk to him. I have discussed the situation with my son, 9, and he understands that he can't see/talk to his dad right now.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    Unless there's actually a restraining order against him, he's free to attend those events.

    Why was the no visitation order issued?

  3. #3

    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    because he had a warrant out for his arrest and skipped the state. the issuance of the warrant was due to failure to follow probation requirements from a domestic violence charge against him.

    someone told me I can call the police to ask him to leave if he makes me/my son uncomfortable.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    someone told me I can call the police to ask him to leave if he makes me/my son uncomfortable.
    "Someone" was misinformed.

    If there is not a restraining order in place, he is free to attend these events, which are typically open to the public. The police will not come to escort him from the premises without a restraining order in place, they will tell you that it's a civil matter.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    Unless he's actually harassing you - and by that I don't mean saying "hi" to you or your son - or unless there's a retraining order in place that includes BOTH you and your son, the police cannot force him to leave.

    If he's actually wanting to see your son, you should be prepared for the possibility of him filing for court-ordered visitation...which he will likely get, even if it's supervised.

  6. #6

    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    Just to be clear, because it makes a HUGE difference as to what and how enforcement of the order might occur.

    Is the order that is still in place today a RESTRAINING order, or only an order that suspends or revokes visitation?

    "Someone told me..." are the most dangerous words one can utter in legal matters. Unless there is an order in effect, such as a restraining order (protection order, protection from abuse order, or similar language), then dad would have no restriction on attenting the game and sitting in the stands. Unless the order specifies NO contact, an order that ONLY addresses visitation or custody wouldn't prevent him walking up to the child in a public place and starting a conversation. IF the order that is in place is a restraining order, and he's in violation of it by being around you and/or your son, then police can certainly act on any violation that they witness, up to and including arrest. But if the order is NOT a restraining order, police aren't going to get involved unless he is creating some public disturbance that would constitute need for a law enforcement response.

  7. #7

    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    interesting because the "someone" was a lawyer.

    Yes I am prepared for him to file a motion, I've already told him that he'd have to do that to change it. And yes I am aware it would be supervised visits if the judge awarded him visitation. It will be a slow process as he hasn't seen or really talked with my son in almost 7 years. It's not that I don't want my son to see him or vice versa, it's that he just needs to follow the rules to do it the right way. Which he has had a problem with doing in the past, hence the warrant issuance.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    Then I'd look for a different lawyer.

    Because what s/he said is simply not accurate.

    Also, if the supervised visits go fine Dad will likely be able to get regular visitation including overnights, weekends and entire weeks during the summer months.

  9. #9

    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    it is only a custody/no visitation order, not a restraining/no contact order. So am I to understand that he would not be in violation of the no visitation order? Or would he?

  10. #10
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    Default Re: What Can Be Done if My Child's Father Comes to a Sporting/School Function

    So am I to understand that he would not be in violation of the no visitation order? Or would he?
    No, he would not be. No visitation means he doesn't get visitation. It does not mean that he may not occupy the same public space as your son.

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