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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
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    4

    Default Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: NV

    I am the Father, I have had legal Custody for 12 years, Our child is now 15.

    My ex has a set schedule on when she is supposed to pick our child up.

    She recently brought me to Court to try and take custody of our child from me and lost on all grounds, she did have her child support (she Pays) increased. I did try to have a counter motion to have her pay for court fees due to her taking me to court without anything substantial to back her up. Unfortunately the judge we had never made a ruling on it so I got stuck with my Lawyer fees and she paid hers.
    ( I don't know how she got her Lawyer her fees were $500 retainer and $50 per hour mine was substantially more the average in Las Vegas is a $3500 to $8000 retainer an around $350-$500 per hour.)

    Her scheduled times are every other weekend picking our child up from school after school and dropping our child off at 5pm sunday, we trade holidays her picking up from school after school and dropping off the sunday after the holiday break at 5pm.

    I have always had the problem with her picking our child up, she Rarely sees our child once every other month let alone every other weekend. Prior to her taking me to Court I made a big effort to help her see our child, if she needed to pick up from my house rather then school it was an inconvenience for me but it allowed her a visit.

    Now that she has taken me to court, we went to mediation and I gave her a month block in the summer rather then every other weekend so hopefully she can schedule a month block and stick to it. but even as we were going to court she only took 3 out of 8 visitations. she rarely takes our child even with our new schedule that she agreed on in mediation, child support is rarely paid on time, sometimes not at all.

    she is supposed to take our child this spring break which she has known about for months and she now is trying to skip out on picking our child up making up excuses some making him think that it is his fault she can't make the pickup time.

    So I keep logs of all the missed visitations and have for years. Is there anything I can do? I would prefer she just gave up her rights and didn't mess around anymore. If she doesn't make the pickup does that forfeit her time or do I just have to deal with her complaining because I won't rearrange my schedule so she can make a pickup when its convenient for her?

    Fathers also get the short end of the stick when they have custody in Nevada, if I call the DA about child support issues I never get a call back, If my ex calls they will talk to her ASAP........I don't get it.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    38,867

    Default Re: Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    You cannot make her take your (jointly) child during her allotted time. Unless she does not do anything to support or visit the child for a considerable time, you are not going to get her parental rights terminated. She would not be able to have her rights terminated generally.

    You can use her failing to utilize her time to argue for reduced visitation for her, eventually.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    but her not picking him up at her scheduled time, Does that void her time frame for visitation?

    She once did not pick our child up when she was supposed to, after school was out from school so our child came home rather then waiting all night at school, the next day she called wanting to pick our child up. I was out shopping and I told her I wasn't going to be home for a while and I couldn't give her an exact time.

    when I got home she had the police come out saying that I wasn't letting her see our child, she didn't call the police until I got home and when I told our child to go in the house and get ready to go with her, when our child came out she wouldn't let him in her car and made our child stay in the driveway until the police arrived.

    Does that fall under abandonment for her? She did leave our child at school.
    or am I in the wrong for not stopping my plans and letting her have her way at her time frame.

    She plays games like this all the time and our child unfortunately gets stuck in the middle.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    Unless your order actually states that she forfeits her visitation, the answer is "no".

    What you describe also doesn't constitute abandonment.

    While you're not expected to hang by the phone or stay indoors the entire time, you do have to be available and contactable. For instance, if she called at 11am the next day wanting to pick up your child at 2pm and you said you couldn't get home until 8pm....that's not ok. But if she calls at 11, wants to pick up at 2 and you get there by 3? She has no reason to complain.

    If you're "out shopping", there's really no reason why you can't give a rough estimate of when you're going to be home. Seriously.


    See where I'm going there?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    So basically I'm at her beck and call whenever she wants to be an irresponsible Parent...

    I have other children aswell I am remarried and problems like this occur if we are planning on going somewhere out of town. if we plan on leaving Friday when the other kids get home and she hasn't picked up our child what do I do then? I can't just say oh well sorry kid your mom will hopefully pick you up just wait here on the driveway for her.

    And if I take our child with me what then if she calls Saturday and I'm now gone for the weekend?

    It seems to run a fine line with abandonment If she doesn't make the pickup and I've already left our child is now Left to fend for himself.

    I know when she is supposed to pick our child up, she chooses at the last minute whether she is going to or not, She also moved about 3 hours out of town a few years ago, so her making a fast pickup in an emergency would be difficult.

    as far as the shopping I believe I gave her an estimate of an hour or two, so she got a rough estimate but not an exact time.


  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    Your child is 15 - you've been the primary custodial parent for 12 years now?

    So....what's changed lately?

    Because this kind of thing doesn't happen overnight.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    21

    Default Re: Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    to the OP , i hear ya on this , its something me and my GF deal with every weekend as well , and like you we've been told we have to have the kids available to the father , weather or not he actually shows . case in point , today he contacted her 30 mins before the scheduled pickup time , and said he will get them at 9 am tomorrow ( not asking ,but telling her thats what he will do) then 30 mins after that , saying never mind he isn't getting them at all.

    there have been times when he just shows up and tells her that he is there , but no prior notice , and we have to then try to accommodate his wishes. its gone as far as , my GF was working after the scheduled child pick-up times.. he would randomly no-show , and then she has to scramble for a sitter, or not go to work. If she tried to have a sitter there to drop the kids ,and he showed , he would not take ( or drop off) the kids from anyone unless she was present.

    its totally frustrating, esp since he decides when he wants to be a parent , then we have to bend to whatever he wants to do , when he wants to do it .


    *Edit* there are 2 children here 5 and 7: i wanted to add we also deal with the police situation , The children's father has the police on civil standby for every exchange , and will not drop the kids off unless there is an officer present , lately he has taken it to the point where he will physically stand next to the cruiser with the kids , and make the kids mother walk over to get them.

    The whole thing is just a big game it seems to him.. as from what the children say , there is little to no quality time spent together. its Highly Frustrating.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Ex Wife Dosen't Take Child for Visitation

    the games have always taken place, I have had full primary joint legal custody of our child now for 12 years. she has always had a schedule since we originally divorced 12 years ago and I was awarded custody we both were awarded joint legal custody, the only thing that has changed recently is that she had taken me to court to try and get custody.

    She lost in court and to her it was a big game, she actually surrendered some visitation when we went to mediation.

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