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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
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    1

    Unhappy Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    Im just wondering about how domestic violence goes. I understand that the first time its a misdemeanor, but what if you get arrested for it a second time? Im going to explain whats going on a little bit..

    My boyfriend got charged for domestic violence because he smacked his mom in the face, they pressed charges against him. They filed for a restraining order against him, but they never showed up to court. The restraining order was dropped, but I believe the state might have picked it up. But I'm not really sure if everything got dropped because his mom failed to show to court.

    Today he punched my friends boyfriend in the face in front of a police officer, he got arrested. My friends boyfriend went to the police station and pressed charges against him. My boyfriend lied to the police as well, they asked for his name and he gave them someone else's name, wouldn't tell them his birthday. The police asked me what his name was and I gave them his name. Then the officer said "Oh, so your Tony (last name), guess what? your going to jail." Earlier before that the police officer told him if Tony lied to him, he was going straight to jail. So I'm guessing he might be in trouble for lien to a police officer as well. But im not really sure.

    Also, yesterday he punched me in the face as well, police were called. but I refused to press charges against him. Im wondering if its to late to press the charges against him now or if I can still do that. I want him to go to jail for a long time. There's something wrong with him, and he needs to open his eyes and see what hes really doing to people.

    So here's my question,
    Does the state automatically pick up domestic violence charges? Like because his mom failed to show to court to get a restraining order.. is the whole thing dropped?

    What happens when you have two violence charges? Is it still a mistometer and is he going to be let out within a few days? or is it something more serious because this isn't the first time hes done this.

    Also, I live in Illinois. Im sure its different in all states.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Behind a Desk
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    98,846

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    You're free to contact the police and to let them know you've changed your mind about pressing charges. I don't know whether they'll reopen the matter; you won't know until you ask.

    We have no way of investigating the status of the domestic violence charge involving your boyfriend's mother.

    His punching your friend's boyfriend in the face isn't domestic violence - it's just plain, old-fashioned violence. The A&B charge that comes out of that incident won't be a domestic violence charge.

    In most states a first offense domestic violence charge may allow the defendant to obtain a deferral. A second offense is not automatically a felony. A second offense that violates the terms of the deferral for the first offense can potentially result in two convictions - one for each incident.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    Come on man. "In most states a first offense domestic violence charge may allow the defendant to obtain a deferral.", you think this is just a joke? Deferal means a big punishment and convicted by crime. Once convicted, your life will go to hell and you will not get any job, home ...bla bla. State is destroying many people life by just doing this, forcing people to devorce because he will not have job. State doesn't know who to punish who not to punish. They punishes everyone even innocent people and innocent guys suffers whole life for this conviction. For what??? Just a slap?? Anyone can make a mistake doesnt mean state has right to destoy someone's life like this. For example, if DA's kid doesn't go to scool fopr one day, will he cut his kid's leg or will give restraing order for 1 year to his dad? So there should be good judgement for each cases and should be classification of severance. First time if someone did mistake with 1 slap or something and victim says that she doesnt want charges, state should not destroy his life by putting criminal charge on his record just for this. They could put him in jail for 3 or 5 days, thats sufficient enough for this kind of fault. State should re-unite husband wife to make good life, instead they are separating each other and runing life and we are paying tax money for doing all this. RIDICULOUS.!!!!!!!!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    9,096

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    Quote Quoting whatkindoflaw
    View Post
    Come on man. "In most states a first offense domestic violence charge may allow the defendant to obtain a deferral.", you think this is just a joke? Deferal means a big punishment and convicted by crime. Once convicted, your life will go to hell and you will not get any job, home ...bla bla. State is destroying many people life by just doing this, forcing people to devorce because he will not have job. State doesn't know who to punish who not to punish. They punishes everyone even innocent people and innocent guys suffers whole life for this conviction. For what??? Just a slap?? Anyone can make a mistake doesnt mean state has right to destoy someone's life like this. For example, if DA's kid doesn't go to scool fopr one day, will he cut his kid's leg or will give restraing order for 1 year to his dad? So there should be good judgement for each cases and should be classification of severance. First time if someone did mistake with 1 slap or something and victim says that she doesnt want charges, state should not destroy his life by putting criminal charge on his record just for this. They could put him in jail for 3 or 5 days, thats sufficient enough for this kind of fault. State should re-unite husband wife to make good life, instead they are separating each other and runing life and we are paying tax money for doing all this. RIDICULOUS.!!!!!!!!
    May I go ahead and assume that you were convicted of domestic violence and now feel that YOU were the victim?

    While a DV conviction may, indeed, lead to a divorce, it is usually because one of the parties feel that their life is considerably better without the constant threat of physical harm.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    I am not convicted, one of my friend is recently falsely accused of this and then I saw so many posts here like that. Neither of the party wants conviction, but still state is trying to destroy their life. cyjeff, it seems you are completely biased, are you DA? If not, may be you are not married. If married, may be you are divorced many times already. That is the reason you want others also to be divorced, fealing zealous???

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    1,376

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    The fact that somebody is married or in a long term relationship chould outweigh the violence. A slap is significant. So is a push, so is taking a gun and just laying it on the table for the victim to see. What you fail to realize is that when we take violence in a relationship and give it a sense of normalcy, we are asking it to escalate to more severe forms of violence. The state is not breaking up happy families. The violence is.

    As for this young lady's question, she could have opened the case if it was Stricken on Leave. If she never pressed charges, but filed a police report, the local police may be willing to pursue charges. If she never filed a report, she still has time to do so.

    As for a conviction, if this is Cook County, he stands a good chance of being found guilty and being placed on some form of probation so that he may complete some programs to help him deal better than he seems to be dealing right now.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
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    1

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    if you recieved deferred on a class A Misdemeanor for assualt on family member does that mean if your "good boy" for the term of deferred and they dismiss it at the end can it be expunged since it isnt a coniviction and will they be able to maintain a law enforcement career

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    1,376

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    Domestic battery convictions, not anything amended to a simple battery, can't be expunged. You may not be a bad person, but you definitely mad a bad choice!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    2

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    You are right about the punishment and convictions for domestic battery. Once you are arrested, that info is out there forever and will always affect your ability to find a job and will always influence your relationships. For example, this website publishes arrests and court information of people arrested for Domestic Violence.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    9,096

    Default Re: Domestic Violence and Battery Charges

    Quote Quoting whatkindoflaw
    View Post
    I am not convicted,one of my friend is recently falsely accused of this and then I saw so many posts here like that. Neither of the party wants conviction, but still state is trying to destroy their life.
    No, the state is trying to protect it's citizens from harm.

    cyjeff, it seems you are completely biased, are you DA? If not, may be you are not married. If married, may be you are divorced many times already. That is the reason you want others also to be divorced, fealing zealous???[/QUOTE]

    Not DA. Married, never divorced.

    I am guilty, however, of wanting every couple in the country that has one member a victim of domestic violence to divorce.

    If you like, I can show you statistical proof of the number of victims that recanted their testimony only to be abused again. I believe the latest percentage is around 85%.

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