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  1. #1

    Default Active Phone Stolen from Grandchild by Step-Mother Over a Year Ago - Will Not Return

    My question involves criminal law for the state of: South Carolina
    I don't consider this family law for these reasons.

    My grandson age 6 was having a diffcult time adjusting to his new stepmom. He says he is afraid of her. There is nothing we can do about the things she tells him in private because it is he said/she said and his Dad believes his wife....then my grandson gets punished for telling me the next time they are alone together.

    He has been diagnosed with sensory integration disorder with anxiety. He wrote me a note asking me if I would buy him a 'sel fone' so he could call his family when he was afraid.

    I bought him a cell phone and included only 10 numbers he could call and that could call him. 5 from his mother's side and 5 from his dad's side....which is mostly his mom, dad, grandparents, and great grandparents. I also had chaperone added to our phones so we could locate his phone if he misplaced it somewhere...and heaven forbid...he get lost or separated (or run away)...we could at least locate the phone.

    There was security on the phone so he couldn't accidentally download anything nor could he text or received emails. We made the phone as child safe as possible. The first person he called was his Dad. He made 47 phone calls the first day to the delight of all the grandparents.

    I purchased it with his mother's permission (she has physical/primary custody of the child) on March 31, 2010. He asked me if I thought his Dad would take the phone away from him if he took it to his house. I told him I couldn't think of any reason his Dad would take it away because he could call him Dad anything he wanted to and his Dad could call him anytime he wanted to on that phone. So he took the phone with him on April 2nd to spend the weekend with his Dad and stepmother. The stepmother took the phone away from him to 'look at it'....saw that her name was not one of the ten names and somehow hacked into the phone and listed her phone number in the list of people he can call. She told my grandson she was putting the phone in her purse for safe keeping. It has been over a year, and she will not return the phone to me. She said it is her evidence that I am trying to block her from contacting her stepson anything she wants to and that I violate her primacy by having child chaperone on the phone. She stole an active cell phone from my grandson. I reported the phone stolen to the police and to the cell phone company. They deactivated the phone and I had to buy another phone for my grandson to try to make up for the devastation he felt. He said he won't take anything "ever again to his Dad's because they steal his things." He won't even take his blue doggy that was his stuffed animal he carries when he is distressed.

    I filed a claim and delivery at Magistrate's office and his Dad and Wife both now agree they will not return the phone to me. They are using it as evidence?????

    This is theft of my phone and their refusal after a year of patiently waiting for them to return it. I tried to be fair to his Dad by even putting his phone number as an approved caller. Other relatives would love to be part of the calling list, but I only wanted the numbers he felt secure calling and those he felt secure with calling him.

    Is this not a crimanal offense? There is a bench triail next week. I am the owner of the phone and the family plan this phone is/was part of. Can they turn this into a family court situation? Had they not wanted him to have the phone at their house, they could have returned it to his Mom telling her he was not allowed to have a phone at their house....not steal it from the child.

    Advice please on what to expect at the bench trial and please tell me how to keep it about the theft of my phone and their not returning it to me....without getting into her paranoia.

    I forgot to tell you that I purchased the phone on March 31, 2010 and his stepmother took it away from him on April 3, 2010.
    without any consideration of his feelings. He was just 6 years old and the phone was to provide him security knowing he could call his daddy or his mommy if he was ever afraid.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Active Phone Stolen from Grandchild by Step-Mother Over a Year Ago - Will Not Ret

    The phone was a gift to the child. A six year old has no legal right or ownership of property. No different than if you gave him a comic book that his parent didn't want him to have, or a game they didn't want him to play. Parental rights to parent their children when with them, including allowing them to have or use a cellphone, trump.

    If the phone was active on your account, you can take them to small claims court and attempt to convince the judge that the gift was really "your" phone, and that you want to be compensated for the value of the phone. Be prepared for the judge to tell you that you should have checked with the parent BEFORE giving the child the phone.

    That's not meant to be crass or negate the INTENT of giving the child the phone - there may have been good reasons. But they don't negate the rights of the parents to deprive the child of something they don't want him to have.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Active Phone Stolen from Grandchild by Step-Mother Over a Year Ago - Will Not Ret

    Thank you so much for responding.

    First let me say that I did ask the parent, my daughter, who is the custodial parent of my grandson. Both she and her attorney thought it was a good idea because of the axiety he was having due to his stepmom.

    It was when my grandson was visiting his Dad and stepmom over Easter weekend last year that they took the phone away from him.
    He had the phone only a couple of days and had talked to his Dad several times before we dropped him off. Had they not wanted to have the phone at their house, they should have told us prior to the visit and he would not have taken it with him.

    I understand the Dad/Stepmom have the right to make the rules in their own home, but to keep an active phone that did not belong to them, they also made the rules in his Mom's house by not letting him bring the phone back to his own home. He does not live with his Dad/Stepmom. He lives with his Mom who approved him having the phone.

    I live in SC. Where do I start to get a law passed that a noncustodial parent and/or the stepparent cannot take items away from a child when they bring it on their visit with that parent. The look on my grandson's face when his Mom and I picked him up from his visit with his Dad broke my heart. At least his Dad told me they took it away from him and they would not give it back unless we did something for him (which I am not going into).

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Default Re: Active Phone Stolen from Grandchild by Step-Mother Over a Year Ago - Will Not Ret

    You must understand that your grandson has NO right to a phone, and Dad DOES have the right - and stepmom by Dad's proxy - to confiscate the phone during their parenting time. (Though they should have returned it)

    UNLESS it is specified in a court order.

    And Grandma - seriously, I think you're becoming far, far too involved in your daughter's legal situation.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Active Phone Stolen from Grandchild by Step-Mother Over a Year Ago - Will Not Ret

    The point I am trying to make is that they took the phone away from my grandson over 1 year ago this week and the still HAVE it.
    I understand your point....that my grandson have NO rights of ownership while at his Dad's house. You've made it clear that the Dad has the right to forbid the child to use the phone in their home....HOWEVER, are you saying the Dad has the right to confiscate an active cell phone from the child with no obligation to return it to the rightful owner???? The lesson this Dad taught my grandchild is
    for him not to take anything he treasures over to his Dad's because he is concerned his Dad will take it away from him.

    Your advice is based on law which protects the parents and step-parent's action toward their children and step-child....
    I also understand that. It seems their aren't laws to protect children from their parent's or step-parent's emotional abuse of the child when they take something that was given to them to use without any consideration of what that does to the child's feelings.

    The law is black and white with no gray areas. I understand that! I get your point! But I do care about how anyone can take someone else's phone and keep it for over a year while that other person is undercontract to pay that bill. Not giving it back when they returned the grandchild to me IS THE PROBLEM i am having! I want to ACCOMPLISH the court helping me get my phone back.
    The phone they had no right to take from me even though it was in the possession of my grandson when they took it.

    Your opinion of me becoming far, far too involved in my daugther's legal situation offends me. I'm only involved when she wants me to be involved. In this particular situation, she and I are both actively involved together. Since the phone belongs to me and I am it's owner I am definitely my grandson's champion in this situation. The Dad was arrested for domestic violence, broke into the home,
    brought his girlfriend to his and my daughter's divorce hearing...introduced her as his girlfriend to my grandson while still married to my daughter.

    HOWEVER: JUST TO LET YOU KNOW, THE MAGISTRATE AT THE BENCH TRAIL FOUND IN MY FAVOR. I WAS ABLE TO GET MY PHONE BACK AND WITH SOME FINANCIAL RETRIBUTION. I WAS SURPRISED BECAUSE EVERYTHING ON THIS BLOG WAS AGAINST MY BEING ABLE TO WIN THIS.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Active Phone Stolen from Grandchild by Step-Mother Over a Year Ago - Will Not Ret

    I'm sorry, what?

    Where was it EVER said that you couldn't get your phone back?

    Did you READ the posts?

    And Grandma - the fact that you're telling me that I offended you actually proves the point. You're far, far too involved. SHE has an attorney. You do need to step back.

    Good luck to you all. Please don't ruin your daughter's future custody though.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    9,096

    Default Re: Active Phone Stolen from Grandchild by Step-Mother Over a Year Ago - Will Not Ret

    Mom doesn't have a great deal of say over how dad parents his child on his time. Unless his parenting is actively harming the child, dad can do what he wants.

    If dad doesn't want son to have a cell phone, dad can take that cell phone away.

    Granted, it should have been returned... but you are missing the point.

    You, Grandma, tried to force your parenting into Dad's time... any parent would have taken offense. Mom had no say... you have less.

    In other words, get your phone back and then butt out. You overstepped and are now upset because you encountered pushback. That happens.

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