This is a highly unorthodox request, to be sure, but I'm in a bad mood and asking it makes me feel better.

I ordered a new garment from a well-known retail chain. Because there are no stores belonging to that chain near me, I ordered it online. The confirmation email informed me that it would be shipped from a store somewhere in the region, rather than from a distribution center. I figured this wasn't really important.

Then it arrived at my door with an anti-theft tag still attached. I called the company, and they told me I'd have to take it to a store to have the tag removed - which is hardly a convenient prospect, given the dearth of stores previously noted - or that they could call UPS, have them pick the garment up from me, take it back to them, and then I'd have to wait a week or so for them to credit the purchase back to the gift card and rewards credit I'd used to pay originally, and then I'd be able to order a new one.

In the meantime, I'd be without said garment for over a week unless I paid for a new one by credit card and forfeited the gift cards and reward credit. They insisted I had to process a lengthy return or I'd have to take it to one of their stores; they insisted that another retailer couldn't remove the tag— not even one of the associated retailers owned by the same company and which share a lot of administration.

So, in a forum full of shoplifters— is there anyone who can tell me how to remove a security tag?

It's easier for me because I actually paid for the item, so I don't have to worry about getting caught.

I can even ask other retailers to do it; if I show them the packing slip with my proof of purchase, I'm sure most would be willing to clean up a competitor's mistake and possibly win new business.

The traditional thing to do would be to send the garment back and write a letter to the company to complain about the mistake and maybe win another gift card out of it (as if I would ever shop there again anyway), but that takes a long time and I'm angry now which is why I'm posting this.

PS— Can I at least wear the security tag'd garment until UPS calls me to arrange the pickup? Or will I set off every security alarm in every store I enter?