California mom wants to prevent emancipation

[LovingMomCA]

My daughter is 14 and living at home with her younger sister and me (her Mom) in CA. (My husband, their dad, is deceased.) She met a guy online who lives in Oregon and will be 16 this month. He was going to run away, but I got wind of it and prevented it. Instead of his mom and stepdad thanking me, they, along with the son, are now trying to steal my daughter! They want my daughter to live with them and go to school there. The son is offering her all kinds of wonderful things and telling her how great it will be.

We are currently living on Social Security Survivor Benefits. There are three checks each month, one for each of us, but my daughters' checks are care of me and for taking care of them. My younger daughter and I would not be able to get by with the two checks. SSI cuts off when a child is 18. Would an emancipated child lose SSI benefits?

I love my daughter dearly and do not want to lose her. She's intelligent, artistic, funny, beautiful...I could go on and on. She has never met the boyfriend or his parents or been to the city where they live or visited the school. This is her first boyfriend. I fear what will happen once he gets tired of her, or more likely, she of him. (He plays video games and watches videos all day and does poorly in school. My daughter is an Honors student and into art, the sciences, math, etc. She was homeschooled for awhile and will be entering her junior year of high school.) The school she wants to attend there is a small Japanese charter school, grades 4 - 12, with 80 students. Her school here is state of the art with the lastest technology, labs, and classes. She is signed up for 3 Advanced Placement classes. I think she will hate the school. There are only two juniors. Additionally, she has two years of Spanish and was planning on having at least three years to get into better colleges. She would have to switch her foreign language to Japanese there. She would not meet many people--I think most of her learning would be at home by herself--and would miss out on social interactions which are so important to a developing teen. She would be isolated, like a caged bird. (The boyfriend would go to the regular high school (also lacking) next door.)

I also fear that my daughter could be raped by the stepdad, the boy's friends, or even the boy himself. If she is emancipated, she would no longer have the protection of Child Protective Services. If she gets pregnant, I think the family would either force her to have an abortion or abandon her.

I am entirely opposed to her living there. It certainly is not in her best interests. She has much more going for her here, and she is a thousand times safer here.

She claims to hate me now and there is little communication.

I do have some proof that the boy exposed himself to her and masturbated in front of her via internet video web camera.

What legal things could my daughter do to move up there? What legal options do I have to prevent it? Is there any action I can take to put an abrupt end to all this?

Please help! This is a parent's nightmare. Besides legal advice, any encouragement or support would also be appreciated.

Thank you.

[Mr. Knowitall]

Move her computer out of her room and into a public place, and restrict her use of it. Or disconnect your Internet, or just take it out of the house.

How is she going to become emancipated? They're going to hire her a California lawyer to convince a court that she is capable of supporting herself, and is otherwise qualified for emancipation, even as you appear in court and object? If she runs away from home, you can involve law enforcement to bring her back.

[LovingMomCA]

Now her plan is to declare me an unfit mother. What is the legal definition of an unfit parent? I don't think I have to worry, but I want to know. What happens if she calls Social Services?

She's convinced herself that she hates me and wants deparately to live with her boyfriend.

Are there any charges against the boyfriend or family in Oregon that I can file?

[aaron]

If she calls social services, she may inspire an investigation of your home. You may find this information helpful.

You can contact the police where the boyfriend and his family live, and report any conduct you believe to be a crime. It may be difficult for them to do anything given the distances involved.

[LovingMomCA]

Thank you for your replies. You are so helpful. I greatly appreciate all your assistance.

The site you gave lists 3 criteria for taking a child away:
1. Wasn't well taken care of or watched over;
2. Was neglected, abused, or molested; or
3. Was left with someone who didn't take good care of them.
None of these fit. (Sigh of relief, but still worried.) The house is cluttered, so I'll work on decluttering.

How do the police or social worker investigate? Do they remove the
children while the investigation is proceeding?

Should I put copies of conversations between my daughter and the boyfriend on diskettes in case Social Services comes?

Should I email the boyfriend's mother with warnings of possible legal action? What would that be--luring, child endangerment, or something else?
Do I need to contact a lawyer? My income is low.

Your first reply had these two statements:

How is she going to become emancipated? They're going to hire her a California lawyer to convince a court that she is capable of supporting herself, and is otherwise qualified for emancipation, even as you appear in court and object?

Is that something that the boyfriend's parents could do? Or were you saying it's far-fetched that my daughter could be emancipated that way? If she lives with the family and gets Social Security, then she is capable of "supporting herself" because the family would be taking care of most of the expenses.

Thank you again for your help.