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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    2

    Default Stopping a Teenager From Seeing Her Boyfriend

    My question involves juvenile law in the State of: Ohio

    I wasnt really sure where to post my question, but here's the story. My 16 year old daughter has had a 17 year old boyfriend for a while that we've never been all that happy about. He's a juvenile delinquent (literally) and my wife and I have been somewhat tolerant of the relationship because he's on probation and he has a lot of commitments and restrictions and they don't actually spend that much time together outside of school - they were not a madly, deeply, attached at the hip teenage 'couple'. Everything has seemed very casual. He has rarely visited our house (I think he could tell we weren't encouraging things). So we have been watching very closely and he hadn't done anything to upset me....until recently.

    We've told our daughter that we don't want her to see him anymore. I realize we're in a tough position because we allowed it, but we did also tell her, if he looks like he's being a bad influence then he goes.

    So, where do my wife and I stand on this kid coming by our house when he's been told not to, or into our house (I don't mean breaking and entering, with daughter's help), or contacting her frequently? She is not against it, just her mother and I are.

    I also suspect he's broken his probation rules but I have no proof. And I suspect he has involved our daughter in illegal underage activities recently, but she denies his involvement.

    Are there any sort of legal actions we can take if this carries on or escalates and he refuses to listen to us? Are we just left trying to explain to our daughter how he's shown that he's not ready to walk the straight line yet? (he was meant to have 'changed') And telling him politely to leave/stop calling/get out? And would we just be asking for trouble to even consider legal actions.....

    I know we opened a can of worms ourselves, lesson learned the hard way - of course if we'd said 'no' at the start, it probably would have all gone ahead anyway behind everyone's backs...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Where Do We Stand

    Well, this is where you can now put your foot down and say "NO!". You're the parents and have every legal right to control who does or doesn't come into your house and, to a great extent, who comes into contact with your daughter.

    You can absolutely get a restraining order against this young man if you say "no" and he continues to go against your wishes. Because your child is a minor, you do not have to demonstrate an actual physical risk to her wellbeing in order to get an RO.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    9,096

    Default Re: Where Do We Stand

    You have the legal right to allow or restrict access to your minor child.

    That is the long and short of it.

    You may not have control over his actions, but you certainly do over hers. Your answer, then, is not as much a legal one as a parental one. You have to be the bad guy.. take away those items used to communicate. Take away the car privileges and ground her until her behavior warrants liberty.

    Time to be a parent. Do what you have to do.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    2

    Default Re: Where Do We Stand

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
    View Post
    You can absolutely get a restraining order against this young man if you say "no" and he continues to go against your wishes. Because your child is a minor, you do not have to demonstrate an actual physical risk to her wellbeing in order to get an RO.
    Ok, and it makes no difference that he is also a minor? And is makes no difference that our daughter may not be a willing participant in a restraining order?
    Do you know what would need to be demonstrated to get one? Would that impact his probation at all? And how does both of them being at the same school work into that?
    Personally, I do see this as a worst case scenario.

    What about trespassing? If he were entering our property at night without invitation from my wife or I?

    Quote Quoting cyjeff
    View Post
    Time to be a parent.
    Are you suggesting we haven't so far? Thanks. No offense, but I'm merely interested in legalities surrounding him.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    24,521

    Default Re: Where Do We Stand

    No, the fact that he is also a minor does not affect your right to control who your daughter sees and where. Nor does it make any difference that your daughter may not want the restraining order. She is the child. You are the parent. This is within your control, not hers, unless you choose to allow it to be hers. As for school, that is not your problem - that is his problem.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Toledo, OH
    Posts
    16,307

    Default Re: Where Do We Stand

    Ok, and it makes no difference that he is also a minor?
    Nope. If you don't want him to have contact with your daughter, he doesn't get to have contact with your daughter, period. Age is not a consideration.

    And is makes no difference that our daughter may not be a willing participant in a restraining order?
    Nope. Not to put too fine a point on it, but until your children reach the legal age of majority, they are essentially your property. If you don't want him to have contact with your daughter, and you want there to be a legally enforceable order prohibiting contact, she doesn't get to say No. Her opinion and desires will not be taken into account.

    Do you know what would need to be demonstrated to get one?
    If you've told him to stay away, don't call, don't e-mail/have any electronic contact, and he persists, that's all you need.

    Would that impact his probation at all?
    If the restraining order is granted and he violates it, yes.

    And how does both of them being at the same school work into that?
    Depending upon how they see each other at school, their schedules may be altered. If they do not share classes, simply notify the school resource officer that a restraining order is in place, and the two are not to have contact. From there, it's school's lookout.

    What about trespassing? If he were entering our property at night without invitation from my wife or I?
    If you tell him to stay away, that's it. If he continues to come around after being told he's unwelcome, that's trespassing, regardless of the time of day.

    Where in Ohio are you?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    150

    Default Re: Where Do We Stand

    One wonders how much good you think Ohio law is going to do for you, since your IP address indicates that you're posting from the United Kingdom.

    US law is not applicable in the UK. Lying to us about your location does not help you.

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