Burdensome Child Support

[Dogmatique]

This is only my 2nd post & I swear I'm not a troll (check my 1st post if need be), but in court on Friday, I swear the judge said that giving up rights doesn't negate support payments. My lawyer told me the same. If it were as easy as giving up rights, all NCP who don't want to pay would do that! she said. My own ex tried the same or at least threatened it. Courts do not like that threat IME. Not sure what the law is in WA as I'm in TN.

Terminating parental rights generally does terminate a current support order though it does NOT necessarily waive arrears.

Terminating visitation rights however is a different animal

[csoutrage]

Yeah, from what I've read it's very difficult to terminate parental rights vs. visitation rights. Usually someone has to be willing to adopt the child. Who is crazy enough to want to do that?? LOL

[Dogmatique]

A stepparent who loves his/her stepkids enough....

...there are many of 'em around.

[mershu]

I believe this is the information you need for calculating support in your situation. You did not mention in your post who pays for any health care costs or daycare costs.

Also you mentioned that it was too early for a review? But then the raised his support? that sounds unfair.

Have you talked to the court facilitators yet? They were very helpful in trying to work the support in the way me and my ex felt best.

The Washington Child Support Schedule neither directly addresses shared nor split custody cases. There are two methods for calculating shared custody cases. Washington allows you to use either the "Sum of Days Squared" method, or the "Sum of Days" method. The "Sum of Days" method is similar to what is done with the "Arvey " method for split family cases in Washington. In the simple "Sum of Days" method, the ratio of the number of each child’s residential days per each parent is multiplied against the other parent’s child support obligation, and then subtracted from each other to determine the transfer. We feel that the "Sum of Days Squared" ratio or the "Sum of Days Cubed" ratio, as used in Michigan, is a better adjustment for shared custody cases, although there appears to be very little case law in Washington to support either method.

You can argue with the Judge that the purpose of WA support is to equalize both households, and unless one of the methods above are used, then the way the order stands now is disproportionate.

[Dogmatique]

I believe this is the information you need for calculating support in your situation. You did not mention in your post who pays for any health care costs or daycare costs.

Also you mentioned that it was too early for a review? But then the raised his support? that sounds unfair.

Have you talked to the court facilitators yet? They were very helpful in trying to work the support in the way me and my ex felt best.

In Washington, the generally accepted method to conduct a split family child support calculation is using the "Arvey" method. This method for adjusting child support in split custody cases was first outlined in a 1995 appellate decision (77 Wn App 817, 1995). The "Arvey" method takes the simple ratio of the number of children per parent, and applies that ratio to the child support obligation for each parent as if all the children were in one family. It then subtracts the difference between the two parent’s obligation to calculate the transfer.

Re-read the thread

[csoutrage]

Ordinary health care costs less than $45 per month (approximately--but I think less) are paid by the ex and extraordinary are split 43% (mother) and 57% (father)---same pro rata share for summer camp---child is too old for daycare now. The mother uses summer camp every other week during her parenting time ($150 per week) and dad can't afford it during his parenting time so I or other family care for their child every other week during dad's parenting time---mother was offered free care during her parenting time but refused and insists in sending the child to camp until age 16 (outside her residential and work city, and at a more expensive one) at dad's expense as well. Draw your own conclusions. This doesn't include child support, which is being increased (incremently) to $680/mo. in a few months.

Oh, mom doesn't provide coverage through her employer as stated in parenting plan, but has stepdad provide it instead---Even though mom's employer can provide insurance coverage for her child less than the cap that the child support order states.

[muddlingthrough]

Ah I see - it's visitation vs. actual rights. That's what the sticking point Friday was for another couple - the child hadn't been adopted so the judge said the father was still responsible for support (substitute mother for father if need be; that was just the situation I saw - Don't want to bash fathers!)

Believe it or not, my ex tried the same. His plan was to run off to another state, mooch off...oops I mean live with another woman, and "give up all rights" to the children (his words, not mine). It takes a special person to love two small children (actually be a stay-at-home dad a portion of the time!) but be so willing to "give them up" to circumvent a little monetary hardship. Don't we ALL have monetary hardships - NCPs and CPs ALIKE? The difference is a CP can't just "give up". (Not that I would EVER in a million years want to!) I would transfer piles of sand with tweezers in the Sahara on a sweltering day for a dime a pile before I'd "give up" my kids!

Meant to add: I know several children as well as some of my own age peers who have been adopted by a very loving & wonderful step parent. Actually, I hope one day my children can have a step parent who loves them enough to at least consider adopting them as I don't think my exhusband has much of an interest anymore.

[CourtClerk]

I would transfer piles of sand with tweezers in the Sahara on a sweltering day for a dime a pile before I'd "give up" my kids!

This deserves quoting because if nothing else, it's the way you're supposed to feel about your kids....

[Dogmatique]

I believe this is the information you need for calculating support in your situation. You did not mention in your post who pays for any health care costs or daycare costs.

Also you mentioned that it was too early for a review? But then the raised his support? that sounds unfair.

Have you talked to the court facilitators yet? They were very helpful in trying to work the support in the way me and my ex felt best.

The Washington Child Support Schedule neither directly addresses shared nor split custody cases. There are two methods for calculating shared custody cases. Washington allows you to use either the "Sum of Days Squared" method, or the "Sum of Days" method. The "Sum of Days" method is similar to what is done with the "Arvey " method for split family cases in Washington. In the simple "Sum of Days" method, the ratio of the number of each child’s residential days per each parent is multiplied against the other parent’s child support obligation, and then subtracted from each other to determine the transfer. We feel that the "Sum of Days Squared" ratio or the "Sum of Days Cubed" ratio, as used in Michigan, is a better adjustment for shared custody cases, although there appears to be very little case law in Washington to support either method.

You can argue with the Judge that the purpose of WA support is to equalize both households, and unless one of the methods above are used, then the way the order stands now is disproportionate.

One teeny tiny point also worth mentioning.

OP cannot do one darned single thing about this. She cannot argue with anyone and frankly shouldn't even be in the court-room.

It's NOT her legal matter.

Jes' sayin'.

[muddlingthrough]

Thanks CourtClerk. I've had to become my children's biggest fan, supporter, coach, counselor...you get the idea...over the past two years. I refuse to have them be burdened because of the life choices of their parents. Yeah, I'm including myself because I made choices as well that led to this final outcome. I would never put my needs before theirs though, and unfortunately, it seems some parents can't get that notion. Sorry, but I knew once I became pregnant that I had a lifetime commitment to raise the healthiest, happiest, productive children I could possibly raise.