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  1. #11

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
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    (I got two more!)
    Kids? LOL If so, I don't want 'em..... the five still at home (16,15,14,9 and 7), combined with the ones that we still have to help (32,30,26,25, and 22, plus my DIL (19) and all the grandbabies) are already a handful for me. ROFLMCAO

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    Your last name isn't Duggar, is it?




  3. #13

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
    View Post
    Your last name isn't Duggar, is it?



    NO, NO, and NO!! LOL I can only dream of having the money they have to take care of that many kids!

    We're just redneck parents, living in the deep woods, trying DESPERATELY to get these kids to adulthood with a small modicom of morals and respect. LOL (Can't really complain, so this is just a joke. My children actually know what the terms responsibilty and morals mean, and they adhere to a lifestyle of working for what you get, and respecting those that help you get there!)

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    You're evidently doing a fine job!


  5. #15

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
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    You're evidently doing a fine job!

    Awww, you're sweet. *huggs*

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    6,808

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    First off, you have 2 months to go until you can walk away.

    If I were you, I'd be concentrating on getting a job. And re-working your budget.

    You are likely going to make Minimum Wage. You may not have full time hours. And you may have to pay Union Dues/Initiation Fees if you get a Union job.

    It's not going to be as easy as you think getting an apartment:
    - Right now you have no job. You have no credit history. Guess what you need to get an apartment? Both. You may need a co-signer for your lease, as if you get a job tomorrow, you won't have a stable job history, and you have no credit history. And not many people are willing to step up to the co-signing plate (it means, if you don't pay....they can be responsible)

    - Most apartments require an upfront payment of First Month, Last Month, and Security Deposit. Do you have the savings to afford that? Seriously, for a $400 a month apartment, they want $400+400+Security.

    - How are you going to get to your job when you find one? Have you added that expense to your budget?

    - Does your budget include stuff like toilet paper, deodorant? Food? Utilities?

    - Does your budget include stuff that you currently have, purchased by your parents, that they may not let you take? They may say "We purchased your bed, dresser, computer, stereo....we're not going to let you take that....". So there's something else to consider.

    Look, sugar....I've been through the teen years. Maybe right now you think the rules are too tough. When you are older you will be grateful. Some of my friends ended up being teen parents. 1 had his first jail stint at 18. One classmate was dead at 19 from a DUI.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    California
    Posts
    397

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    Just like everyone else has said, you can't do it. Not without a job, not without means to support yourself FULLY.
    You are almost 18... 2 months away!
    I remember when I was 16 trying to get the info on emancipation... ha, what a joke that was. I was even denied an apartment after turning 18 because I didn't have 4 years of history renting. I had everything else, but not that.
    Anyways, I thought my father was the worst... trying to ruin my life. But in the end, he was trying to do right, and I honestly wish he would've been more strict with me.
    It's not going to kill you... get a job, suck up to your parents cuz they will be the ones, probably only ones, to be there no matter what!
    You should be happy that your parents are interested in your friends, boyfriend and grades. They are not stupid, they know what 17 year olds are thinking about. They know what teens do, even if you deny drinking, drugs, sex, etc. They know that this year in school is the most crucial for college....
    Wait it out, take a step back and look at the bigger picture.

    Mamabear---- holy crapola!!! I commend you for all of them! I would've torn my hair out after the 30 year old!

  8. #18

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    Quote Quoting mrshiggins
    View Post
    Just like everyone else has said, you can't do it. Not without a job, not without means to support yourself FULLY.
    You are almost 18... 2 months away!
    I remember when I was 16 trying to get the info on emancipation... ha, what a joke that was. I was even denied an apartment after turning 18 because I didn't have 4 years of history renting. I had everything else, but not that.
    Anyways, I thought my father was the worst... trying to ruin my life. But in the end, he was trying to do right, and I honestly wish he would've been more strict with me.
    It's not going to kill you... get a job, suck up to your parents cuz they will be the ones, probably only ones, to be there no matter what!
    You should be happy that your parents are interested in your friends, boyfriend and grades. They are not stupid, they know what 17 year olds are thinking about. They know what teens do, even if you deny drinking, drugs, sex, etc. They know that this year in school is the most crucial for college....
    Wait it out, take a step back and look at the bigger picture.

    Mamabear---- holy crapola!!! I commend you for all of them! I would've torn my hair out after the 30 year old!
    I hope the OP comes back and reads these posts, there is so much truth within all of them. Life isn't easy, but at 17, the decisions that you make may very well affect every aspect of your life going forward. A teen pregnancy, lack of education, being unable to support yourself and pay the bills (think credit record here), all have consequences on your future. I have been very fortunate with my children, they observed the situations that I conquered, and made conscience decisions to make their lives easier (yes, I was a teen mom), by pursuing their educations, which allowed them to get decent jobs. At 17 (and 20, 25 etc) they think they are immortal, that they can grab life by the shirt tail and ride it out. We lost our 21 yo son in March to a horrific accident, and thankfully, because he listened and observed during his upbringing, he provided well for his young wife and children. He stayed with a tough job (although it paid well, it wasn't a job that was pleasant most days), purchased the life ins and disability ins that I insisted that he have. We argued for many hours about the above, with him debating my opinion because of his age. We only found out after his death that he was only arguing to assert his independance, and had signed all the papers after initially talking to me. Sometimes kids just feel the need to argue with their parental units, but are still smart enough to listen without acknowledging. I'm hoping that this is the case with the OP.

    And mrshiggins, after the first couple of kids, you just go with the flow LOL. The older ones are your 'experimental' children, and you use what works, discard what doesn't with the rest in line. The older children often tell me that they wish that they had the same parents that the younger ones do!

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    6,808

    Default Re: 17 and Fed Up

    What Mrshiggins said....I totally agree.

    Honey, I'm sure we all remember what it was like being a teen. I know my family was so overprotective that I was 21 with an 11 pm curfew! Seriously!

    You know what? I'm grateful for that. Why?

    Because I did not end up like some of my friends and classmates.

    - I'm not the one who was DEAD at 20, out drinking and driving.
    - I'm not the one who gave birth at 14.
    - I'm not the one who had 3 kids and 2 abortions by the time she turned 20 - all with different fathers. In fact, the third one - she had to do paternity testing to decide who the father was!
    - I'm not the one who was in Rehab for part of her Junior Year in High School.
    - I'm not the one who got suspended at 15 for bringing alcohol to school.

    Your parents seem to care. The things that bug you now...in a few years you will see through different eyes.

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