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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Posts
    8,238

    Default Re: Can Ex-Wife List Dad As Responsible for Medical Bills

    She can list anyone she wants. However, her telling the medical provider that your husband is financially responsible is pretty much worthless for the medical provider. Absent a contract in which he agrees to be liable for the bill the provider would lose in court suing him for payment of the bills. But if he wants to fix getting the bills and phone calls collecting for this he will need to go to court to do it. His view that the court will always side with the ex is not only not correct but is self-defeating. He has no chance to change it if he doesn’t even try. He needs to get the backbone to challenge her and make sure she pays what the order says she is liable to pay.

    By the way, the allergy clinic very likely violated federal law in disclosing your step-son's medical information to you. Although you may not like hearing this, since you are not his mother you should stay out of this sort of thing. It will only inflame the ex and make things even harder. Your husband is the father, and it's up to him to deal with things like the medical needs of his kid. I know you probably just want to help your husband out, but I've seen too many situations in which the “helpful” step-parent oversteps his/her role and makes the relationships involved worse rather than better to know that it doesn’t often work out well.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    16,474

    Default Re: Can Ex-Wife List Dad As Responsible for Medical Bills

    Quote Quoting Taxing Matters
    View Post
    She can list anyone she wants. However, her telling the medical provider that your husband is financially responsible is pretty much worthless for the medical provider. Absent a contract in which he agrees to be liable for the bill the provider would lose in court suing him for payment of the bills. But if he wants to fix getting the bills and phone calls collecting for this he will need to go to court to do it. His view that the court will always side with the ex is not only not correct but is self-defeating. He has no chance to change it if he doesn’t even try. He needs to get the backbone to challenge her and make sure she pays what the order says she is liable to pay.
    I think that might vary from state to state when it comes to minor's medical bills. I do believe that in at least some states the provider can go after both parents. What I am confused about is that the OP says that the insurance her husband provides is very good, so how does the out of pocket get to 1k?
    By the way, the allergy clinic very likely violated federal law in disclosing your step-son's medical information to you. Although you may not like hearing this, since you are not his mother you should stay out of this sort of thing. It will only inflame the ex and make things even harder. Your husband is the father, and it's up to him to deal with things like the medical needs of his kid. I know you probably just want to help your husband out, but I've seen too many situations in which the “helpful” step-parent oversteps his/her role and makes the relationships involved worse rather than better to know that it doesn’t often work out well.
    I heartily agree with this. Its almost "classic" on the list of things NOT to do.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    2

    Default Re: Can Ex-Wife List Dad As Responsible for Medical Bills

    To clarify, the allergy clinic didn't provide me with much medical information to speak of; I can't imagine it was anything confidential as it was pretty straightforward information of a rather general nature about medications. And son's mom actually ASKED ME to take him to some of his allergy appointments (as they were inconvenient to her), at which time I asked questions about proper administration of his medications (since he is with us half the time and mom told us conflicting information about dosages) and what to watch for and what he should have available at school for an emergency (son knew he was supposed to have medications at school, but mom didn't want to pay for them). Mom was always aware of everything I did and in most if not all cases, asked me to do it. I do realize I have no legal parental rights and I've tried to be careful of that - only be helpful for the sake of my step-son and to always make sure mom knew anything I did, ahead of time so far as possible. As for the courts being unfair to fathers, my husband has had some extremely bad experiences (nightmareish even) that this opinion is based on, so I can see why he feels this way.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    1,421

    Default Re: Can Ex-Wife List Dad As Responsible for Medical Bills

    Quote Quoting DLMinKS
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    To clarify, the allergy clinic didn't provide me with much medical information to speak of; I can't imagine it was anything confidential as it was pretty straightforward information of a rather general nature about medications. And son's mom actually ASKED ME to take him to some of his allergy appointments (as they were inconvenient to her), at which time I asked questions about proper administration of his medications (since he is with us half the time and mom told us conflicting information about dosages) and what to watch for and what he should have available at school for an emergency (son knew he was supposed to have medications at school, but mom didn't want to pay for them). Mom was always aware of everything I did and in most if not all cases, asked me to do it. I do realize I have no legal parental rights and I've tried to be careful of that - only be helpful for the sake of my step-son and to always make sure mom knew anything I did, ahead of time so far as possible. As for the courts being unfair to fathers, my husband has had some extremely bad experiences (nightmareish even) that this opinion is based on, so I can see why he feels this way.
    Maybe it is because your husband has not actually stepped up to do the things he is supposed to do. The clinic should not have given YOU any information without a proper release being signed. I also note you blame mom that the appointments were inconvenient to her so that is why YOU had to do it. Where was your darling husband -- the father of the child? Apparently it was inconvenient for him as well. Why hasn't your husband stepped up to the plate? Why is he letting you do the parenting while he does nothing but cry that the courts are unfair?

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