Florida has a shifting burden of proof; if the relocating parent can prove their case, the burden shifts to the non-relocating parent to prove that the move is NOT in the best interests of the child.
statute here
Florida has a shifting burden of proof; if the relocating parent can prove their case, the burden shifts to the non-relocating parent to prove that the move is NOT in the best interests of the child.
statute here
Thank you for the statute link.
Essentially, a certified letter, as detailed in statute linked above, leaves Dad with 20 days to come up with cash to file for a custody hearing? I believe it's 400 to file yourself in FL. I've heard the parent that files first often has the upper hand but, that most judges are still sexist and favor mom.
I think it would reflect poorly on me (mom) to do this sort of smash and grab maneuver in court. However, I may be applying emotions where I shouldn't.
Dad would lose some time, yes. However, I am very willing to give him all school, holiday and summer breaks. I am also more than willing to revisit this when our child is 12. As of now, the no-bedtime, constant video game exposure etc does not gel with my values. I don't even have a tv. He goes to bed at 7 at home. We don't watch violent programs here.
I am more than aware the above criticisms of his father don't mean a whit in the court's eyes.
What would be my (mom) best course of action? I do not want to traumatize anyone but Dad refuses to discuss this. We speak about everything else and are actually very close.
Should I file or do I have technical legal custody already?
You must follow the law.
You're correct - your ideas on Dad's parenting are completely irrelevant in court. He's allowed to let them stay up and play video games if he wishes.
Florida is actually one of the more progressive states when it comes to Father's Rights. It's a myth that most judges favor the female parent. Ownership of the uterus does not make a whit of difference these days (and rightly so).
You haven't indicated, however, why the move would be in the best interest of the child/ren. You may have to make a decision - relocate without the child, or stay put.
I believe it would help my son because he currently is zoned for an F school in a rough area and my new husband's salary is double his father's. He could go to the excellent public school in the zone we would live in or private if we choose. He will be able to enjoy an appropriate number of after school activities.
I believe I am the more fit parent. For reasons that are mostly philosophical and need not be detailed here. I think it's incredibly important that he has been in my uncontested custody this entire time. I have traded off entire years of holidays with dad. Last year was his- Christmas, birthday, thanksgiving, everything. I have moved closer to dad to make it less expensive for him to see his son. I did this last August of my own accord and (obviously) at my own expense.
His dad is a good dad, I have no intention of using this move to alienate him. I just feel I can offer my son more as far as education and experience goes by relocating with him during the school year.
I also kind of feel that the burden is on him to protect his own rights. I've been very generous because I love my son and I respect his Dad. However, he needs to shell out the bucks and get some legal advice. I did when he tried to get me to sign a parenting plan.
I'm sorry if that makes me sound like Satan.
Nothing says YOU cannot file for custody. File and submit a parenting plan, have dad served, and include the move in the filing. That way the child is protected in that he gets to see both parents. Submit a plan that would give dad exactly what you are saying you are willing to do (all breaks/summer/pay for the transportation). Add phone calls/Skype so dad and son can keep in constant contact.