Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: Washington
I am almost 20 years old and I am active duty military for the Air Force currently stationed in Louisiana. My two younger half sisters ages 14 and 12 live with our mother who has been using a variety of illegal drugs for years including perscription abuse. The father of the kids died and I am the only living, blood relative that they have any sort of contact with. The 14 year old wants to come live with me because she knows that my mother is unfit and is willing to fight in a court. My mother has some criminal records and has had cps called on her in the past. She is not willing to give up custody because each of the two kids gets money every month as social security from their father's death which they all basically live off of yet she still spends so much on drugs that she tends to run out before the money comes again. She believes she is such a wonderful parent when really the house is disgusting, she hasnt worked because she is falling apart from the years of drug use and alcohol abuse and her boyfriend has a job as a logger but he is just as bad with the drugs.
I feel I have a pretty good chance of gaining custody of the two girls, theres also a 4 year old boy that is my half brother but the boyfriend living with my mom is his father so getting custody of him is less likely. My primary concern is the girls because I want them to finish school and get some college and the limited education of my mom and her boyfriend prevents them from helping with homework if they even actually wanted to.
I am wondering what my best course of action would be and trying to get as much information as I can. I have some money available to get a lawyer if I need it.
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
IF you're active duty there's literally no chance of getting custody - I'm sorry. This alone precludes you from getting custody even if you could overcome the next problem....which is that WA state is NOT a very third-party custody friendly state. To gain custody you would need to prove BOTH parents unfit to the standards of the court, and if CPS have not found Mom to be unfit you stand no chance here either.
Sorry it's not better news.
You don't have standing to sue at the moment, and the 14 year old doesn't have standing to petition the court either.
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
If things are really bad at their home, please continue to notify CPS.
Also, the girls should talk to someone they trust...school counselor, teacher, pastor, doctor, etc...
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
Well I called CPS yesterday and mentioned my military status and the person on the phone didnt seem to think that that would affect my ability to gain custody.
And also he recomended that my sister actually call CPS herself and speak to a Child in Need of Services (CHINS) person and give them her own information involving my mom. Same phone number (DSHS) in Washington.
I also spoke with my sister's friend's mother who has picked my sister up from my mother's house at all sorts of odd hours of the night because of my mother's and her boyfriend's drunken rage getting out of hand sometimes and this woman is willing to provide information to a CPS investigator.
I'm posting so other people can gain information from this or give me other helpful information as well or advice. Ill continue to post if anything else comes up.
Thanks for the posts so far!
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
Here are the problems;
CPS hasn't found reason to remove them. As other posters have suggested, continue to call. But realistically, CPS removal typically comes in EXTREME circumstances; no running water, no food in the house, rat or roach infestations, physical signs of abuse, exposure to toxic chemicals, running a meth lab, etc. Drinking, and even marajuana or pain killer use, USUALLY isn't even grounds for removal, IF the children otherwise are attending school, eat every day, have clothing, clean water, and aren't living in filth. The standards at which a parent must maintain a home are, as you can see, relatively very low. CPS intervenes in cases of danger or abuse, but they can't and won't force parents to be better parents, keep a cleaner house, help with homework...in short, parents have the right to be bad parents, they just can't be dangerous parents. Because there ARE other children who are living in conditions that bad, THAT is where CPS, underfunded and understaffed, will focus their attentions.
Let's consider an extreme circumstance, and assume mom and the boyfriend get pulled over with the kids in the car, they both have a joint in their hands, pills in their pockets, etc. After the arrest, CPS takes the children into protective custody, and assuming you are close by, available, agreeable, and CPS doesn't find anything to prevent it, odds are pretty high that they'd be happy to put the children TEMPORARILY into your care, as opposed to foster care or a group home. Then they'll concentrate on working with mom to get into and out of drug rehab to get the children back. So long as mom is making progress in whatever program CPS and the court set out for her, CPS will continue to work to put the children back with her (that's really their goal, to keep families intact, even when drug, alcohol, and other problems are prevalent).
CPS probably wouldn't have a problem placing with kids with you, even in light of your duty status, BUT, remember that such a placement would be on a TEMPORARY basis, and CPS can always fall back on foster care and group homes if the temp placement doesn't fly (again, all predicated that mom completes any jail time and is working whatever program they offer her). But for PERMINENT placement, which gets determined by a JUDGE, and not CPS, it WILL be an issue. The court isn't going to remove children from a stable, even if dysfunctional, home, and put them in a situation where they could get used to a new lifestyle, only to have you get called into duty and their lives be disrupted AGAIN. They don't want the children to become juggling balls, even if the current situation isn't optimal. If you were married, and your wife was willing to adopt them as a legal co-parent, AND the court otherwise ruled that removal from the mother was in the children's best interest, it could be a different story. But the court isn't going to consider the stability of a single guardian on active duty to be any less problematic than the problems the children are facing NOW, just DIFFERENT problems.
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
And additionally, OP, the military will NOT allow you - being single and active duty - to become primary custodian in this situation.
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
The military does not control every aspect of our lives. They have protocols for single parents on active duty status. My MSgts are working with me to get this taken care of so if your a civilian please dont make assumptions. If your military then either your base works differently or things have changed, they change everyday.
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
Quote:
Quoting
homesweethome
The military does not control every aspect of our lives. They have protocols for single parents on active duty status. My MSgts are working with me to get this taken care of so if your a civilian please dont make assumptions. If your military then either your base works differently or things have changed, they change everyday.
Did you read what was written? :confused:
You are dead wrong. You will not, if you are currently active duty, become the primary custodian of anyone who is not ALREADY your child. But of course you can come back next week and tell us that we're all wrong, that you sorted it out and that you're now all living together happily.
Re: Trying to Gain Custody of Younger Siblings
Quote:
Quoting
Dogmatique
You will not, if you are currently active duty, become the primary custodian of anyone who is not ALREADY your child.
Just wondering can you post where this is written or where it is said? Because that would work better than just stating it. No offense but a written source always outways: Because i said so or A friend told me.