Before Marriage Lies and After Lies, Verbal, Emotional and Physical Abuse
We married twice within 2 months. 1st. in Fl (where we live) in July and renewed in Negril, Jamaica in Sept.
By the time we were married 3 months the verbal, emotional and drunken rages were so bad I went into a battered woman's shelter. I refused to return home until he made a verifiable counseling appointment. My foot had been stepped on & at I believed him when he said it was an accident but no longer believe that.The MRI showed a fracture & 2 sprains. Even now it is painful to walk & I am limited to tennis, bare foot or slippers.
By our 2nd. & last appointment with the PhD it got so bad I call for a ambulance during one of his drunken rants and spent 5 days in CCU and his adult daughter who lives in the home had tried to beat me up after I asked her to help out in the house. He refuses to make or ask her to do 'anything' in the home & she doesn't contribute a cent & he pays all for her.
New years eve my physical and emotion health had suffered beyond belief and angrily I got all off my chest and said I was leaving within days. The day before I was to leave a saw a side of him I'd never seen or heard so I stayed.
All was wonderful for about 2 1/2 months then I started to see/experience the same old behavior.
On 4/28 in a drunken rage he ran up on me & choke me. When I asked him to stop he was hurting me his grip got tighter & the glass I was hold broke. My hand, fingers, knee and face was cut/bleeding. When he let me go I call 911 and he was arrested.
At 1st appearance on 4/29 he was ROR, & the court ordered: call court services within 24 hrs of release; come to courthouse within 72 hrs of release to give address for mail; maintain alternate residence; no contact with me; release to court service for treatment supervision; evaluate & participation in treatment for substance abuse, alcohol abuse & anger management; one time visit with law enforcement officer to pick up personal belongs.
On 4/29 'before' he was released for jail he call me from the jail & asked to speak to his daughter. After their call I helped her pack a suitcase & sent his cell phone. Several hours later he call again using the cell phone I sent. Shortly after that call he come to our home and took our car. I called the police and they called his cell & left a message to call the police dept. When he didn't they issued a warrant for violating the no contact order and faxed a copy to The State Attorney's Office.
On 4/30 he called in to court services, said he was in a hotel & asked if he could call home to speak to his daughter and if he could go to pick up the car at our home & he was told "No" to both. He failed to tell her he had done both the day he was released and when I reported the violations to the court a report of his violations was written.
On 5/4 he replied to a e card I had created/ordered on 4/21 to be sent on 5/4 our 10 month anniversary. He replied "Dear ___, I love you too." I called The State Attorney & per request I emailed a copy of his email along with a email from the e card site customer service dept. that I had created the card on 4/21 to be sent on 5/4.
My husband doesn't work, has money (from dead wife's ins.) and can stay hidden for a long time. He knew I had an appointment the day after he took the car to schedule my 3rd. workers comp. surgery for 2 shoulder tears and knew I was out of 1 of my heart meds & had to wait until 5/1 when the new PC doc kicked in, knows it is more than 2 miles just to get out of our sub division/another mile to a bus stop and I do not have any money.
With all of this in mind, does anyone know what he will get for all the violations & misleading/not telling court services he'd already violated the no contact order? What more can I do to protect myself? What can I do to support myself when I am unable to work/will be TTD after surgery?
Re: Before Marriage Lies and After Lies, Verbal, Emotional and Physical Abuse
You file for divorce, if you have not done so already. The women's shelter may be able to help connect you with legal aid or an affordable lawyer.
Unfortunately there's no magic answer to supporting yourself when your spouse is broke, missing, and unemployed, and you're injured.