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What If My Parents Don't Want Me To Emancipate

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  • 05-04-2009, 10:10 AM
    Kimberlyy
    What If My Parents Don't Want Me To Emancipate
    My question involves emancipation laws for the State of: Connecticut
    I am a 15 year old female, I will be 16 November 16th. I am very independent and tend to take care of myself most of the time. My parents blame me for everything, they don't really talk to me especially my dad, he goes for days without talking to me. I have therapist and she says there is to much tension in my house for a 15 year old. My parents always fight and fight with me, my dad has hit me times before. I am looking for a job for this summer, and for a job after school. If my parents don't want me emancipated what can I do ?
  • 05-04-2009, 10:14 AM
    lilmisschaos92
    Re: Answers
    wow i have almost the same situation. i have been trying to move out for 8 months now, but i cant find anything on emancipation. i hate my mom and my dad is in cali, so yeah it sucks. i still havent found ways to get around the laws. my boyfriend is 21 and im 16, he wants to get married, but finding it really hard
  • 05-04-2009, 10:30 AM
    divemedic
    Re: Answers
    Read

    To be emancipated by the court under Connecticut law, you must be at least 16 years old. You must also meet the following conditions:

    * You must be married, or
    * You must be in the U.S. armed forces, or
    * You must be living apart from your parents or guardian and be managing your own money, or (and that means providing for everything on your own- rent, food, medical care, utilities, all of it) AND (and this next one is the hard part)
    * The court must decide that an emancipation is in the best interests of you, or your parents, or your minor child (if you have one).
  • 05-04-2009, 11:27 AM
    Kimberlyy
    Re: Answers
    Well do you think once I turn 16 I could go to the court and find out if I can get emancipated? Plus my therapist is also helping me with this. I hate my dad, he's arrogant and he's nothing I want in my life, he's a negative outlook to me. I can't stand him, and I hate being home. I take care of myself very well and 99.9% of the time I buy myself my own food, clothing and I pay for my phone bill. I have a boyfriend who is 15 and he's in the same situation. Once we get emancipated we plan on getting engaged finishing school getting better jobs, buy a house for us and start our life. Mostly, I'm tired of my dad! He treats me like I'm nothing. Seriously, I want out! I need answers.
  • 05-04-2009, 11:38 AM
    aardvarc
    Re: Answers
    Notice that emancipation has NOTHING to do with showing how bad a parent treats you. The court wants to know if you EARN enough money to put a roof over your own head, pay for medical insurance on yourself, pay for ALL costs of living (and if living with anyone else, you've got to show that you and you alone could pay ALL of the rent and bills if the other people got hit by a bus), and can keep your grades up while doing that. When you've held a job that pays that much for 6 months, gather up your pay stubs and a detailed budget (including health insurance!) and call your local Clerk of Court to find out how to get a date for the judge to look it all over. However, the minute the court even sniffs that you'll be living with a boyfriend, you can kiss emancipation goodbye. Living with boyfriends typically means babies aren't far behind, and you'll have a heck of a time paying for your own expenses, much less those of a child (and the VERY last thing a court will allow to happen is to emancipate a teenager who HAS a roof over their heads and food in their bellies so they can become at risk for going on food stamps or other taxpayer supported programs). So for you to have ANY type of chance at emancipation, it'll mean your BF being OUT of the picture.
  • 05-04-2009, 11:48 AM
    Kimberlyy
    Re: Answers
    I know that, first of all I can support myself, second of all I wouldn't be living with my boyfriend or a friend. I support myself more than my parents do! I have good grades, I can keep a job, I can pay for everything I need and I'm definitely not having a baby at 15 or 16 or anytime after that, when I get married then yes, I'll have kids. I want emancipation because I can't stand living at home and I know that I can support myself. I'm very mature and independent. Also, people mostly get emancipated because they can't stand living at home, I asked my therapist about all this and she is helping me. I would like answers .. not what you think.
  • 05-04-2009, 12:19 PM
    divemedic
    Re: What If My Parents Don't Want Me To Emancipate
    Being in therapy will hurt more than help. My own daughter thought she could support herself when she was your age. Sit down and take a realistic look at your financial situation. I know my daughter was looking at the career counselor's information, and thought that since she had taken a high school photography class, she could get a job as a photographer. According to the career counselor's list, that job paid up to $100K a year, so she figured that she could get a job as a photographer making half that, or $50K with her semester long course behind her.

    As a high school student, plan on making minimum wage (or close to it). I don't know of a single area of the country where a minimum wage employee can make it on their own.

    I know you think your parents are stupid, mean, and controlling. I know you can't wait to get out and start your life with your 'soulmate'. All teenagers think that. As we grow older, we realize that our parents were smarter than we thought at 17.
  • 05-04-2009, 12:28 PM
    LawResearcherMissy
    Re: What If My Parents Don't Want Me To Emancipate
    Quote:

    Also, people mostly get emancipated because they can't stand living at home,
    No they don't. Firstly, the courts grant fewer than 1% of emancipation petitions nationwide - in the states that even have provisions for emancipation.

    Secondly, emancipation is granted based on need, not want. "I hate my parents and the suck and they're meeeeeeeeeeeeen!" is not grounds for emancipation, and the courts will not grant it.

    "I've been orphaned and I need to be legally emancipated so I can legally sign contracts to take over the mortgage and keep the lights on." is.


    Quote:

    I asked my therapist about all this and she is helping me.
    1) Your therapist is wrong.

    2) The courts will not emancipate a minor who is in mental health treatment.

    Quote:

    I would like answers .. not what you think.
    You're getting answers. It's really not our concern that you don't like them and stomping your little foot at us isn't going to change them.
  • 05-04-2009, 02:38 PM
    aardvarc
    Re: What If My Parents Don't Want Me To Emancipate
    Quote:

    I know that, first of all I can support myself, second of all I wouldn't be living with my boyfriend or a friend.
    The COURT doesn't care what you know - the court cares what you can SHOW. Gather up all your receipts showing that you've earned enough to cover the budget you've drawn up that includes rent, health insurance, food, transportation, clothing, etc. THAT is the packet you need to have in hand to PROVE what it is that you think you know.

    Quote:

    I support myself more than my parents do!
    How much of the rent did you pay last month? How much of the water bill, electric bill, cable/internet bill? Did YOU pay for every bite of food you took? If so, those are excellent arguements for your case. If not, you're sunk.

    Quote:

    I have good grades,
    Excellent! Keep them up - they're important to getting into good schools, getting good jobs, etc. - especially in this tough economy with SO many other people competing for jobs.

    Quote:

    I can keep a job,
    The word CAN means nothing in an emancipation heaing. When you've gotten and HELD a job for 6 months, and that job is consistantly earning you enough to cover your comprehensive budget, THEN it will count.



    Quote:

    I can pay for everything I need
    Again, CAN means nothing in an emancipation hearing. When you've ACTUALLY PAID FOR such expenses for a few months, you'll be ready to try (keep all of your receipts).


    Quote:

    I want emancipation because I can't stand living at home
    No one's argueing that point, but being miserable at home has NOTHING to do with being emancipated. Nothing. No matter how bad it is. Period.

    Quote:

    and I know that I can support myself.
    Broken record. The court cares what you can PROVE in COURT. What you "know" you can do means zero, zilch, squat, nada.


    Quote:

    Also, people mostly get emancipated because they can't stand living at home,
    No, minors WANT emancipation for that reason - but the reality is that those who actually GET emancipated get it because they have shown the court that there is no one else to care for them - AND they have been able to show a DOCUMENTED HISTORY of providing for themselves to a high degree such that the court feels they could continue to do so, rather than placing them in foster care or making them wards of the state. This is the reason less than 1% of applications for emancipation actually make it through the process. It's a HARD process to get past - and for a good reason.


    Quote:

    asked my therapist about all this and she is helping me
    You ask therapists questions about therapy, not about legal processes that don't involve them. The only help that being in therapy will get you in the emancipation process is if your therapist will let you live with her after the court denies emancipation.

    Quote:

    I would like answers .. not what you think.
    Look, I get it that my opinion or anyone else's opinion here is irrelevent to you - but our opinions reflect the opinions of THE COURT who is going to respond to your request (most of the people responding to your question have SPENT some time sitting thru hearings, trials, etc. and have SOME idea of how things work). It's not that we are trying to piss on your parade - it's that regardless of what people who don't know anything about the REALITY of the process have told you, your case doesn't even come CLOSE to a possibility for emancipation at this point. I also get it that you're a teenager who knows everything there is to know about everything, and that you lack the real life experience to anticipate based on reality rather than emotion, so go ahead and get it out of your system; get on the phone and call the Clerk of Court in your county and set up a hearing. Just remember everything you've been told here when you step up to talk to the judge.
  • 05-04-2009, 05:27 PM
    cbg
    Re: What If My Parents Don't Want Me To Emancipate
    What if your parents don't want you to emancipate?

    Then you won't be emancipated.

    It really is that simple.
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