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Joint Physical & Legal Custody

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  • 01-29-2006, 06:39 PM
    TChevy
    Joint Physical & Legal Custody
    I have joint, physical , legal custody of my 2 girls, My question is , The mother wants to move them out of state, I'm talking 3 states away, what are my options ? she has told me that we could split the time with them, 1 of us have them all through the school year and the other get them for all of summer break and any other school breaks, she has also indicated to me that she wants them for the school year, but this is also when I want them, right now we have it set where we have them every other week, I dont want to give up my kids for 8-9 months out of the year, and only see them maybe 3 months every year, what are my options here legally?

    Thanks
  • 01-29-2006, 07:04 PM
    Mr. Knowitall
    Joint Legal and Physical Custody
    Do you have roughly equal parenting time as well?

    Unless you and your ex- chose different language, the custody order prohibits certain relocations with the children, including moves to another state, without court permission. If that is the case and you oppose the move, you can make your ex- attempt to establish to a court that it is in the children's best interest to permit her to relocate with them to another state. If you do oppose the move I suggest you work through a lawyer, to make sure that you are well-represented in the court proceedings.
  • 01-30-2006, 05:58 AM
    erik63
    I went through the same thing when my ex tried to change the custody away from our shared physical and legal custody. She supposedly had an out of county job offer, and wanted full custody because this would supposedly be better for the kids. She never got anywhere with it, and the job offer disappeared long before she eventually dropped the case. Not only is it extremely difficult to change custody arrangements, but you would also then have to change the residential clause in your agreement.

    I agree with Mr Knowitall. While it seems like you have a good chance to prevent this move, you should definitely hire an attorney. Small mistakes can be very costly for you in the long run. It also shows the importance of having a good agreement in writing.
  • 01-31-2006, 06:37 AM
    TChevy
    Yes , the way it is now is we have them 1week on 1 week off , As we don't live far apart I transport them bnack and forth to school the weeks they are with me, Last night she called and said she was filing a motion with the court to take the kids for the school year leaving me with just getting them summer and breaks, Also we were never married either , so the cusotdy papers we have make no mention of out of state moving, I'm going to contact a lawyer today because I don't want to give up my kids for that long, I have even thought about moving closer to the state she's moving too so that my kids are closer to their mother.
  • 02-01-2006, 07:57 AM
    erik63
    This is the same way my ex tried it. We had an agreement with 1 week each. She tried to tell me that I could have them all vacations. If you would agree to something like this, it then becomes very simple to change it further in her favor. The advise given to me by lawyer was to to budge one bit. I offered her that I take the children full time and that she could have them during vacations. As mentioned previously, she got nowhere with her "move". Now, 3 years later she has moved out of state and left the children full time with me.

    If you have an agreement in writing, you have the cards in your favour. It is just extremely important how you play them. This is why it is vital for you to hire the best attorney you can afford. Good family attorneys are worth their weight in gold in cases like this.

    Good luck.
  • 04-05-2006, 04:40 PM
    TChevy
    well needless to say I did hire a great attorney, and she dropped the moving part all together knowing she would not win at all. But since then she has become very upset, because I had hired a good attorney and since I wasn't using him for that cause I petioned the courts to change my daughters last name to that of mine, since they carrry her ex-husbands last name, and she is now married with a different last name. She is fighitng me on this,here reason is not to change them because they have been who they are all their lives, and that they have 2 sisters(her ex-husbands children)and she wants to have them all have the same last name, so really she hasn't to me shown a good enough reason to leave their names his. I mean I'm their father and they want my last name, we goto court next week to let a judge decide. My question is I guess is that they state I have to show it to be in the best interest of my girls to carry my last name and I have come up with some but it is so hard to put into words how it would be in their best interest, I mean my last name (not her ex-husbands) is their heritage, bloodlines, history,I have even suggested giving them her maiden name-my name to make it so they have both, but she flat out refuses to give them her last name saying it's her adoptive name and that she never wanted her mother to take away her father's name, so If she was upset with her mother for giving her someone else's name that wasn't her father then why is she doing this to me? Any help would be greatly appriciated. Thank-you
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