Phone Contact During Visitation

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Maryland

My ex husband and I are going around and around regarding phone contact with my 5 year old son. I am accostumed to calling every day, however, now my ex feels that this is too much. This week, I have our son for one week summer visitation. His father sent his phone with him, but we have turned the phone off so it does not get lost or broken, but have provided my ex with 3 other numbers at which to reach him. Our son has shown absolutely no interest in talking to his dad, and has been having a blast. He did talk to him Sunday night. His father is now threatening to pick him up early if that particular phone is not turned on. My real suspicion is that he is upset that he is not speaking to our son every day. There is no court order for either of these demands. My question is: if he comes and demands to take my son home early, what rights do I have? Can he take him? Can I then file Contempt of Court charges?

Thank you all so much.

Instead of just getting into a pi**ing match with your ex (pardon my terminology), why don't you just turn the phone on?

Perhaps he has free calls from his phone to that phone. I'm sure there is a way you can have it on without it getting lost or stolen right?

I find it curious that you want to speak to your son every day, but have a problem with him doing it. Are you doing what is best for your son in this case, or are you just punishing (or proving something to) your ex?

I'm sure that you don't want his father to come pick your son up early, and put your son in a difficult situation, so why not just give him the little bit he asks for and turn on the phone? Really. And have it somewhere that your son can answer it if it rings. And leave the sound on. *lol*

Good luck,

~Christina

p.s. yes, if he does that you could file contempt of court charges, but once the judge starts listening to what you and your ex have been doing, he may order you both into family counseling.

If you have a court order for your visit he can not take your son early for any reason or he will be the one in contempt. You do not have to give him your son. If there is not a court order I would get one. As far as phone contact if you can not agree on it have it put in a court order as well. I have it in my papers that says that reasonable daily access will be provided for the kids to talk to the other parent and the parent with whom the kids are with is responsible for making sure the kids call the other parent. We can call the kids at any time when they are away. Now my kids are 10 and 13 and can remember to call if they want, if they don't want to its ok, but we can call them when they are with the other parent. You should ask your son if he wants to talk to his dad. If he says no don't force it, but if your ex calls allow him to talk to your son.

Here's a solution. Turn the phone on and have your son talk to his father every day.

Argument over.

I've read your threads, you've got a lot going on. I would also recommend you don't get into a pi**ing match about a phone and simply make it available to your son.

I read that your husband has sole legal and physical custody. He is therefore the legal guardian and the court has deemed that he makes decisions in regard to you and your ex's son. That's a tough pill to swallow sometimes.

Your ex is well within the law, to remove the child from your place of residence and any other residence on the planet. Removal will be enforced by the local police if proper documentation is presented. Should you not agree with the early exit, I suspect you will have to visit the court room again.

I also read that your children spoke with the judge regarding time spent in the car. What will your son tell the Judge regarding phone calls?

Update and response: I appreciate everyone's comments and suggestions. This has been a very difficult time for all of us. My two older children (the ones that spoke to the judge) are doing great. I have it in their court paperwork that I am to speak with them every day. At their ages (10&11), I haven't been completely forcefull about it. Should a trend emerge, I can pull out the court papers, but so far their dad has been much more cooperative. My 5 (now 6) year old is another matter. My ex didn't end up coming to pick up our son. I laid it out very politely, and called his bluff, and he stayed put. It is very frustrating that the judge refused to put anything in writing with regards to phone contact. Against my better judgement, I had a conversation with my son (twice in fact, and in the presence of my husband) and we decided together that we would speak every other day. Unfortunately, as soon as he went home with his dad, I got an e-mail informing me that it was very wrong of me to manipulate our son into an every other night phone call. Shortly thereafter, he actually put our son on speaker phone with both of us, and told him to, "Tell your Mom how often you want to speak with her". While I'm not thrilled with this, feeling backed into a corner, I agreed. Now the phone contact is very irregular and he is refusing to tell me the name of the psychologist our son is supposedly seeing. Ugh....what a mess. I really cannot afford to take him back to court, so for now, all I'm doing is documenting....

I realize you and most of us are dying to get their ex's back into the court room and complain about all of the injustices. Ensure you aren't spinning your wheels or throwing your time and money down the drain.

The most important question was 'what would your son say?'. Should your son really have appointments with a psychologist, that psychologists input would weigh heavily in the court room.

I wish I knew what my son would say. He is only 6 years old, and I have not been given information on his psychologist in order to possibly have a better idea of where his little brain is, and phone contact with him is slowly stretching to more and more days in between phone calls. It seems so wrong to ask him questions like that when his dad is standing right over him, and I just cannot justify attempting it. He is so young and impressionable and it makes me sick to think his father is putting our son in the middle. I simply can't see how it's in his best interest to be alienated from his mother.

Wrong post, sorry... here is is again.

ex said, "Tell your Mom how often you want to speak with her" . Did you hang up?
It sounds as if there was no negotiating at that point? What did you agree to?

I believe the proverbial cat has her tongue.
Who's being rude now?, just let us all know if you are done with the discussion.:confused: