Visitation Between Virginia And Colorado

Hi everyone,
My husband has 4 sons from his first marraige, 11, 13, 15, and 16. The divorce decree gives 50/50 but lists mom as custodial parent. After years of extreme drama from the ex, we decided to move from CO to VA. Maybe our reasoning wasn't real wise but we had only good intentions. We used to have one week on/one week off with the boys and it was HARD for them. We tried to talk mom into adjusting the time to make it easier but that was only received with anger. Anyway, we thought if we withdrew ourselves from the daily drama she may calm down and see we aren't out to get her. NO!

Please note that the oldest two will no longer spend time with us, too many rules. Mom's home has become the local flop house for all the delinquent kids who don't want to go to school. The oldest two went from A/B students to straight F's and rarely are in attendance. The oldest has been in the system for two years now for a variety of reasons. The two youngest are trying so hard. The 11 year old has begged both of his parents to be allowed to live with us and we would love to have him. His mom has said that we only want this to reduce child support, so we told her she could keep it the same. Still no! This is so hard. There is no structure, no parenting, no supervision, and very little affection in her home. The youngest just sucked all that stuff up when we could spend time together.

Now she won't even let us see them. My husband called her to set up a visit, flew to CO, rented a car, hotel with lots of great stuff for the boys, etc. and she called the police and told them he was going to steal the boys. They came to my mother-in-laws home while they were all eating dinner together and amid screams and crying from the youngest two, withdrew them from his care.

HELP!