-
Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
My question involves a child custody case from the State of: N
Two weeks now I dont see my child since custodial is not bringing him at designated pickup location. She wants me to go to another address not included in the court. Just because she “has family emergency”. I told her Im only going where the court ordered to not another location. How can I make her enforce the order?
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
It's just beyond you to be the least bit accommodating isn't it?
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
If the other parent has a valid reason for asking for the change, a court will admonish you for being so inflexible. Co-parenting is an active issue. Things change; life happens. If you expect the other parent to stick to the exact letter of the order, then don’t get upset when they complain you are 2 minutes late at the exchange or any other rediculously minute detail.
Unless the change causes a hardship or you have reason to believe there are ulterior motives, then be a good person and accomodate the request.
If you want to make make a bad name for yourself in court, file a motion seeking the other parent be held in contempt for not complying with the current order.
Courts tend to remember parents that are problematic.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
According to her mother, stepmother grandfather was sick for two weeks and died yesterday and my ex younger child was at emergency last night due to the flu. She wants me to go to stepmother family location not mention in the order. I told her to bring him to a police station and she refused. She offer extra days but wants me to pickup at the other location. She offered overnight not enforce yet in the order but wanted me to buy him clothes. Now been three weeks without seeing my child or talking to him over the phone because she insist on using another phone that is not her personal number. So I had to blocked the other one as well or any message from her because she keep asking things not enforce in the order.
I dont want to go to another location because she filed a police report saying I disappeared with my child for few hours after she asked me to bring him to another location. Her excuse was that she filed it because I blocked her number and she had no way to communicate with me and the number I was texting her she though I blocked it as well. Thats why I dont go to another location. Shes the one unwilling to coparent. What can I do to solve this?
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
There's nothing you can do to solve this as long as you continue to think that all her actions have to be for your convenience. You should be allowed to bend the order but she has to follow it exactly, unless if would benefit you for her to bend the order in which case she should do so. Meanwhile as long as it works for you you're going to follow it to the letter regardless of her convenience, but as soon as it's no longer convenient for you it's okay to break it. As long as that's your attitude, which it has been as long as you've been posting her under any name, there is no solution to your problem.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
For the love of Pete, GO AWAY. We are tired of hearing your deal.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
She’s violating the order for a whole month and im the bad one?
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
You blocked a number bcasue it’s not her usual number?
youve got some real problems. She can use any phone she wants to use unless she is required to use a specific number per the court order.
She has offered additional “compensation” due to the request you pick up the child at an unscheduled location
for Pete’s sake; stop being a jerk and learn how to get along for the sake of your child.
edit to add:
i just realized who this is.
You arent ever going to be happy, are you.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Yes. You are the bad one. I don't know how to make it any more clear than that.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
My question involves a child custody case from the State of: N
Two weeks now I dont see my child since custodial is not bringing him at designated pickup location. She wants me to go to another address not included in the court. Just because she “has family emergency”. I told her Im only going where the court ordered to not another location. How can I make her enforce the order?
She had a family emergency and she asked you to be cooperative. You refused. So YOU are deciding not to see your kid because YOU are a selfish POS. If you try to take her to court for contempt and the judge finds out she was trying to work with you when she had an emergency, the judge is going to be mad at YOU. YOU are the problem you realize this right?
There is nothing that says you can't deviate from the order if an emergency comes up. So what if you had an emergency and you couldn't meet her at the place - is it okay for her to say "no you have to meet me here."
Be reasonable. I guess you're not seeing your kid until the next time you have visitation then.
Quote:
Quoting
Back
According to her mother, stepmother grandfather was sick for two weeks and died yesterday and my ex younger child was at emergency last night due to the flu. She wants me to go to stepmother family location not mention in the order. I told her to bring him to a police station and she refused. She offer extra days but wants me to pickup at the other location. She offered overnight not enforce yet in the order but wanted me to buy him clothes. Now been three weeks without seeing my child or talking to him over the phone because she insist on using another phone that is not her personal number. So I had to blocked the other one as well or any message from her because she keep asking things not enforce in the order.
I dont want to go to another location because she filed a police report saying I disappeared with my child for few hours after she asked me to bring him to another location. Her excuse was that she filed it because I blocked her number and she had no way to communicate with me and the number I was texting her she though I blocked it as well. Thats why I dont go to another location. Shes the one unwilling to coparent. What can I do to solve this?
HOLY SHIT - she offered you MORE time and you said no? Her grandpa died. Her other child is in the hospital. Be a HUMAN BEING and work with her to see your kid. It's YOUR fault you haven't seen the kid. YOU. No one else. YOU.
No she is 100% TRYING to coparent. YOU aren't. What can you do to solve this? BE AN ADULT! That's all you can do.
Quote:
Quoting
Back
She’s violating the order for a whole month and im the bad one?
She's not violating the order - she offered you more time if you met her during a family emergency. She was trying to work with you. So you know what go ahead and file contempt. I wish I could see the judge tear you apart when he or she hears that she tried to coparent with you and you refused.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
This been happening for 3 weeks now she can easily leave my child at her mother house as stated in the court order but she wants me to go to another location. Yes she offered more time but pickup at another location. Overnight but for me to buy clothes. How is that coparenting from her? This is a temporary order next court is February.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
And your intractability and refusal to be in the least bit accommodating will not bode well for you...I can see why she divorced you.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Dude, you have been told over and over how incredibly stupid it is that you refuse to take telephone calls from any number but her personal phone. That is just asinine and childish. I know what all of your excuses are, and they are just stupid.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Go to Goodwill or a consignment shop or heck, even Walmart and pick up a few inexpensive changes of clothing for YOUR child. Keep them at your location. Send the child back in the clothes that wore with them. Instead you expect a packed suitcase of things his mother (or others) bought for him? That's just not the way it works, even if you are paying child support. The custodial parent is not expected, by the courts, to provide for 100% of the child's needs while they are with the non-custodial parent. BE A PARENT....BE A GROWN UP! And just maybe you will get to see your child. Instead you are reinforcing any bad things he is hearing about you each and everytime you act like a jacka$$.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
You guys really think the judge would be happy to know that I missed 3 weeks of visitation this included christmas because mom refused to give me my child at the designated location? That I have over a month without phone calls because shes calling from a number is not her? The judge made it very clear NO PHONE FROM STEPMOTHER. And she had rhe guts to say that the judge said that because I lied saying stepmother overstepped with conv
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
you have blocked phone numbers that you KNOW are hers or members of her household....how can she possibly know what phone calls you are going to deign to accept? Get over the stepmother.....it doesn't matter if Stepmother overhears what you are saying.....unless you are badmouthing her.
Until you see this is about YOU and not them, you are never going to learn and this is going to be a continuous ongoing war.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
So, prove that it's stepmother calling when it's from a different number. Don't just assume it or say it, prove it. Without proof and I mean real proof and not your just saying "I know it", I think when the judge hears that you missed visitation because you blocked all phone numbers but one, you're going to be very surprised at who the judge is yelling at. And it won't be either Mom or Stepmom.
You're going to lose any right to see your child at all at this rate.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
You guys really think the judge would be happy to know that I missed 3 weeks of visitation this included christmas because mom refused to give me my child at the designated location? That I have over a month without phone calls because shes calling from a number is not her? The judge made it very clear NO PHONE FROM STEPMOTHER. And she had rhe guts to say that the judge said that because I lied saying stepmother overstepped with conv
You missed holiday with the child becasue you threw a tantrum and refused to pick up your child
yes I belive the court will side with the mother given what you’ve posted here.
And if you refuse to answer answer your phone, no phone calls is also your fault.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Is not my ex grandfather is stepmother so has nothing to do with my child. Im not saying is stepmother calling but he is calling from her number which the judge made it clear no phonecalls from stepmother as she overstepped
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
If it is not stepmother calling, what difference does it make what phone your ex uses? The judge didn't say she could only use one phone.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
The judge said no stepmother phone because I said she interferes with communication. So it has to be through mother phone. Now according to my ex shes saying that the judge will tell that stepmother had nothing to do with overstepping but me refusing to communicate through her phone. Seriously?
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
Is not my ex grandfather is stepmother so has nothing to do with my child. Im not saying is stepmother calling but he is calling from her number which the judge made it clear no phonecalls from stepmother as she overstepped
If the order prohibits the step mother from calling then that means the step mom cannot call you regardless of what number she calls from. But it also means that the judge did not prohibit the mother from calling you from her mother's place. So read that order carefully to find out exactly what the court said they cannot do. Your insistence that all calls from her must come from one particular phone number is almost certainly not going to go down well with the judge. You are making everything here much more difficult than it needs to be with no good reason. You need to end the battle of trying to make her bend to your will.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
No. The judge told my ex wife she had to provide another number not stepmother. This is my child calling from another number not stepmom. But it has to be from my ex number not stepmother and thats what they are doing. Thats why I blocked the number because they are not following the order
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
No. The judge told my ex wife she had to provide another number not stepmother. This is my child calling from another number not stepmom. But it has to be from my ex number not stepmother and thats what they are doing. Thats why I blocked the number because they are not following the order
Your child is calling from a number that is neither the mother's number nor the stepmother's number. You have admitted that. The court order does not state that your child cannot have his own number.
However, I no longer care at this point. I WANT you to go to court over all of this so that you will get your backside handed to you in court for your bad behavior. That would be the only hope that your son would have in having a reasonable relationship with both parents.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
I have three weeks without seeing my child because shes not bringing him to pickup location or police station and Im the bad one!? They are interfering with my child and I relationship
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
I have three weeks without seeing my child because shes not bringing him to pickup location or police station and Im the bad one!? They are interfering with my child and I relationship
No. Again, you haven’t seen your child’s bcause you want others to feel sorry for you by blaming the mother. Its still your fault for not picking up the child from where you know they are. You can address the mothers failure to provide the exchange where the order says but until then it is you refusing to pick up your child that is the cause of you not seeing your child.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
She still in contempt of court!! Three weeks without seeing my child. Thats contempt!! And she is at risk of losing custody for that
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
She still in contempt of court!! Three weeks without seeing my child. Thats contempt!! And she is at risk of losing custody for that
It’s up to the court to determine if it is comtempt of court
and given the situation as you describe it, no, she isn’t at risk of losing custody.
but that doesn’t matter. You aren’t seeing your child becasue you refuse to pick up your child.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
She still in contempt of court!! Three weeks without seeing my child. Thats contempt!! And she is at risk of losing custody for that
You total idiot! Not only is she not at risk of losing custody, but she has offered you extra time in exchange for your cooperation. You are the one who is refusing to see his child. AND you are refusing to see your child for no good reason at all.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
The judge will definitely understand that I dont want to pickup or drop him to another location after she filed a police report. She filed a police report after asking to send him to another location than claimed I disappeared for three hours. Based on her I was supposed to bring him right away and that she was calling me from numbers I previously blocked and she didnt know I was contacting her to another phone which she didn’t have with her at the time. Story short, thats why I dont go to another location if is not the police station or what the court order says. Shes a bad person and no one seem to understand this.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
You've been certain in the past that the judge will see things your way. How's that working for you so far?
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
This one is another one. This one seems to understand that calling from stepmother phone is not an option.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
You just keep believing that.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
When I first went to court my ex wife said I had a number which was stepmom. The judge said not her number. Because I made it clear she intervened with conversation
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
When I first went to court my ex wife said I had a number which was stepmom. The judge said not her number. Because I made it clear she intervened with conversation
Well, you let us know how it all turns out for ya.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Even you guys admitted shes in contempt of court
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
Even you guys admitted shes in contempt of court
I didn’t. I said it is a court’s decision to determine contempt of court. Given the scenario you provided I suspect not only will she not be found in contempt, you will be admonished for not working with the mother to effect your visitation.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
No, we did not. That's just more of your mis-characterizing.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
Quote:
Quoting
Back
Even you guys admitted shes in contempt of court
I certainly DID NOT admit any such thing. She is not refusing the visitation, YOU are.
-
Re: Custodial Refuses Visitation What Can I Do
I don't recall how far the requested location was from the scheduled pick-up site. Are there other issues with the requested Location such as a PO against you from a person likely to be at that location?
I can see legitimate reasons that pick-up at other than the designated location would be inappropriate.