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Deomestic Violence Charge After a Struggle Over Car Keys

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  • 08-30-2018, 10:54 PM
    thejackalope361
    Deomestic Violence Charge After a Struggle Over Car Keys
    My question involves criminal law for the state of: IOWA

    The other day, my husband thought it was a great idea to argue with me while I was driving with our children in the car. Once we were at our place of residence he wouldn't get out of the vehicle even though I asked him to. I let him know that I would call the police if he didn't to which he finally did.

    I drove away to calm down and to put distance between us. I knew of I had gone inside that he would continue to be confrontational and he would follow me around the house until I was trapped.

    I parked a local grocery store for a bit but my children became restless and my baby was gettimg fussy. I couldn't take them to a park because it was supposed to rain. I neither had money to take them to get an ice cream to kill time so my husband could calm down and decide to wait until later when the kids were asleep to discuss it.

    I finally drove back and called my mother to ask her for advice and he came from around the corner and had been outside, waiting.

    He approached the car and motioned for me to unlock the door. Assuming that he had calmed down, I let him in. He still wasn't ready to let the matter go and proceeded to badger me. He kept the door open so I couldn't drive away until I convinced him to close it. When I turned the second corner he asked me where I was going and I felt his mood change when I told him that I was driving to his mother's. He then reached over and put the car in park while I was driving. It scares the children and I did tell at him, asking him what he was doing because what he did wasn't very smart. I put the car back in drive and pulled over because I didn't want h doing that again, say on a busier road, nor did I want him to damage my vehicle.

    Once I was parked safely he yanked my keys out of the ignition and refused to give them back to me.

    ...I'm a rape and molestation victim. I felt trapped, threatened and cornered. The driver door latch is broken from the inside and I had no way out. The only way for me to get out was to use the keys to roll down my window to open the door from the outside. I wasn't going to attempt to go out through the back passenger doors and risk him grabbing for me and possibly hurting my children in the process. He was blocking the other door and wouldn't give me my keys to get out or leave. Nor did he get out of the car when I told him to. I tried calling 911 but it didmt go through the fisrt time and he asked me who I was calling and I said the police while I was making second attempt at calling 911 and he knocked the phone from my hands.

    In that moment of feeling trapped, cornered and feeling that he was putting my children in danger, because i didnt knpw what he was going to do. I experienced "fight or flight". I couldn't flee so I tried to fight my way out.



    He has long arms and mine are short and I was still buckled in. I tried to pull and grab at anything I could to get my keys back in my hands. The report says that I struck him and then pulled his hair. My eyes were brimming and I couldn't see exactly what I was doing but I know that I somehow got a hold of his hair to bring his body closer to mine thinking that if I could just get his hand and arm closer I could get a hold of my keys. I finally did and I heard my lanyard break. It was right after that when he threw my keys put the window.

    I immediately stopped and I felt defeated.

    The police arrived and asked questions.

    In the report, it states that he stopped the car and took my keys because he he didn't think it was a good idea for me to drive while I was upset. But I wasn't balling my eyes put or screaming until I felt trapped and cornered. I was calm before he did that. I had one thing in mind, and that was to arrive at his parents home where I knew I wasn't going to be harassed. I need my space from him and he needed to calm down. He doesn't want his parents to know how he can get. He didn't want me to tell his parents anything. That's why he stopped the car. This was not the first time he's taken my keys so I wouldn't leave the house to get away when he wouldn't give me my space. Nor is it the first time he's made me feel trapped and cornered.

    The police arrested me for Domestic Abuse - 1st Offense and Child Endangerment X4. The DHS case worker filed yesterday for the NCO to be dropped, hopefully later today.

    I haven't seen my lawyer yet but I have an appointment set.

    I'm needing advice and or opinions on whether this looks bad on me considering the emotional and mental stress that happened to me when I felt trapped cornered and felt that my children and I were threatened.

    I have never been convicted of and crime. I also have documentation with medical professionals of my childhood trauma. I've been seeking counseling to find coping mechanisms for when I'm triggered.

    Will I be given jail time or will is it possible that my charges will be dropped?
  • 08-31-2018, 06:30 AM
    flyingron
    Re: Wrong to Power Struggle for My Car Keys
    You need to remain silent and only discuss things with your lawyer.

    You can not assault someone because they have your property.
    Your history doesn't change that.

    If you feared for your safety, then you might have a self defense argument for whatever you had to do to remove yourself from the threat. However, it's not cut and dry and WE don't know what evidence/testimony the STATE will present. Understand, that it is "society" that is harmed by criminal activity and it's not a "You vs. Him" in court, it's the State of Iowa versus YOU.
  • 08-31-2018, 09:55 AM
    Mr. Knowitall
    Re: Wrong to Power Struggle for My Car Keys
    If your ex- prevented you from calling 911, who called the police?
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