My question involves a child custody case from the State of: CA
I searched through old questions and couldn't find an answer that fit my situation. My ex has our 3 children 1st and 3rd weekends of the month. He works a normal 9-5, M-F, job, but when he has the children, he is claiming that he is called into work to work nights, 10pm-8am, and has someone sit with them overnight.....at $300 per day. Our order states that I am responsible for 1/2 that. Those charges are $1200 per month for 4 days of care. I can't afford that, I don't make that much money.
There is little to no communication, he absolutely refuses. I have asked that he call me to watch them and he refuses. We do not have a Right of First Refusal as we live 90 miles apart from each other, judge will not grant it.
I know that these charges are false and this childcare person does not exist. He says he pays this person cash, refuses to give me any of her information, and the children have never seen her. I don't know what to do. The child support judge (who is not our custody judge) will not listen to me and constantly sides with him.
Help!!
How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
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10-26-2017, 01:29 PMMrsdiaz16How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
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10-27-2017, 11:03 AMqwaspolk69Re: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
What does the order say? Mine says that we have to provide documentation of child care (like a bill) within 10 days of getting the bill or statement. If yours has that then he has to provide you with some kind of statement that shows child care charges. If it doesn't then I would go talk to a lawyer.
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10-30-2017, 01:55 PMoldsmomRe: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
Yeah, I would ask for documentation. In your shoes, I would have never started paying that to begin with without evidence of a real human being, and the actual details. I would tell him to take me to court if he doesn't want to prove the child care. It is not unreasonable to want to see what you are paying for.
Are you the custodial parent? And do you get to write off daycare on your taxes? If so, that can be another avenue to explain your expectations. -
10-30-2017, 08:48 PMllworkingRe: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are FalseNo way in heck would I give him that kind of money without very solid proof...particularly since the children have never even seen this alleged babysitter. $300.00 a night for any overnight babysitter is literally absurd. I think that he is scamming you big time.Quote:
Quoting Mrsdiaz16
However, on the off chance that he is NOT scamming you, then he has to be making some pretty serious money when he gets called in for those 10-8 shifts, otherwise it wouldn't be worth it to him to pay his half of those 300.00 a day babysitting bills. Therefore, if he attempts to take you to court for refusing to pay those outrageous babysitting bills, then you should file a counter motion for an increase in child support based on the fact that he has to be making considerable more money based on the fact that he considered 300.00 a day acceptable for babysitting costs while he takes on extra shifts while the children are in his care. -
10-31-2017, 11:45 AMMrsdiaz16Re: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
Thank you all for responding. I have not paid him, but he has taken me to court and the judge ordered that I pay over $4600 (that's my half) in these charges, it is now being garnished. He had to prove nothing at all. I tried to prove that babysitting in his area for a whole week was less than his one day bill and the judge stopped me from speaking, didn't want to hear anything I said. I feel railroaded. The order says we are to split daycare 50/50, but he refuses to reimburse me for my charges.
I work 2 part-time jobs and trying to stay afloat with 3 kids is hard. I cannot afford these type of bills on top of my own daycare which he doesn't pay his 50%. I've asked him to stop, I've asked for a change in child support as well, but the judge once again stopped me from speaking. He said that I should quite my 2 part time jobs (I make about $3000/mo with both) and find one full time job, no matter what that job pays me. I've tried to change visitation showing that he should schedule around the 4 days a month he's with his kids, but because this person is fake and he's lying the children are not suffering from him "fake" working.
I'm at a loss and don't know what to do. I feel like the whole court system is out to get me and my ex will stop at nothing to make me pay for leaving him. -
10-31-2017, 11:50 AMPayrolGuyRe: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
When you were in court did you request proof that he was paying that much or did you just sit there and say that babysitting cost X in your area. And when you were trying to prove what the cost was did you have actual documentation?
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10-31-2017, 12:02 PMMrsdiaz16Re: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
He sends me receipts that are handwritten (in what looks like his own handwriting) and says he pays cash every single time. I looked in his area for alternate daycare, not mine as we live 90 miles apart. and yes, I had statements from other providers in his area. Judge didn't even listen to me. We've been to court several times for this and like I've said before the judge has shut me down.
Now my ex has threatened me with "Good luck for day care while working a partime job. I do like commissioner Isaac." and " Good luck explaining this to Commissioner Isaac." Those are direct quotes from his emails to me. -
10-31-2017, 12:59 PMPayrolGuyRe: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
You clearly need a lawyer or at least a better one.
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10-31-2017, 01:07 PMMrsdiaz16Re: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are False
PayrolGuy, thank you. That's what I was afraid of. I can't afford one, but I guess I'll have to figure something out.
Oh, sorry for any confusion, I don't currently have an attorney. -
10-31-2017, 01:29 PMqwaspolk69Re: How to Prove That Claimed Child Care Expenses are FalseWhy haven't you taken him to court for not paying HIS share of daycare when they go in your care?Quote:
Quoting Mrsdiaz16
Find lawyers who do free consultations in your area. Maybe they can at least help you in the right direction. Most do a free 30 min consultation.