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Can You Move Out if Your Parent is Verbally Abusive

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  • 08-03-2017, 10:19 PM
    AveryRome
    Can You Move Out if Your Parent is Verbally Abusive
    My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: Florida.

    I know living on my own is a huge step for anyone, but my mother can be verbally abusive at times and it stresses me out a lot. It's been happening for a long time, and my mom has Intermittent explosive disorder and it can cause huge problems in our relationship.

    Also, her parents who have dementia and live in our home always side with her - since they were also abusive in ways. I'm wondering what are the legal ramifications if I decide to move out and live on my own. I know with an adult's co-signature I could rent an apartment, and I get money from the government. (I also know that's not a living and am looking at jobs to help support myself.) I was wondering if I could collect the checks myself if I left home, even though I'm two years away from being a legal adult. My father passed away so the only possible solution would be me living with a friend or on my own.

    I am NOT looking to run away. I'm looking to find a solution that follows Florida law, but can also provide some relief and a buffer between my mother and me.

    I know Emancipation is an option, but I also know that it's a long shot, and Verbal abuse is very hard to prove in a court of law. I'm not looking for my mother to get in trouble either, which most likely could happen.

    I know this is a difficult question to answer, especially with multiple variables, but any help would be appreciated. If possible, It would help to know the specific laws on renting an apartment, collecting government checks and the laws on living alone as a minor.

    To be clear, I do not want to live on my own because of normal teenage problems (Thinking rules are too strict, dating issues, ect) I don't have those problems. I would like to live on my own because at the moment, my mother can have a temper and go into a 'temper tantrum' if she does not get her way or if one of us does not side with her all the time. My grandma's advice was 'accept the blame' for things that are not my fault. My mother can blow up at small things or even without provocation. It it NOT a emotionally stable enviroment for me.

    With that said, I should probably stop typing and post this thread. (Sorry for the long read!)
  • 08-03-2017, 10:54 PM
    Dogmatique
    Re: Can I Live on My Own
    You won't qualify for emancipation, and if your mother won't agree to let you live elsewhere you really don't have any options. If you leave without consent you can end up in trouble yourself, and so would anyone harboring you against the wishes of your parent.

    Perhaps there is an Aunt or Uncle close by who, with Mom's permission, could take guardianship of you?
  • 08-04-2017, 11:41 AM
    cbg
    Re: Brat
    As long as you are under 18, you live where your parents say you live. If they say you can move out, you can move out. If they say you can't move out, you can't move out. It really is that simple. Unless you are removed from the home by the state, there is NO option, and I mean absolutely no option no matter how many but-what-ifs you come up with, for you to move out of the house over your parents' objections.

    Permission to move out = move out.
    No permission to move out = stay put.
  • 08-04-2017, 01:54 PM
    qwaspolk69
    Re: Can You Move Out if Your Parent is Verbally Abusive
    Quote:

    Quoting AveryRome
    View Post
    My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: Florida.

    I know living on my own is a huge step for anyone, but my mother can be verbally abusive at times and it stresses me out a lot. It's been happening for a long time, and my mom has Intermittent explosive disorder and it can cause huge problems in our relationship.

    Also, her parents who have dementia and live in our home always side with her - since they were also abusive in ways. I'm wondering what are the legal ramifications if I decide to move out and live on my own. I know with an adult's co-signature I could rent an apartment, and I get money from the government. (I also know that's not a living and am looking at jobs to help support myself.) I was wondering if I could collect the checks myself if I left home, even though I'm two years away from being a legal adult. My father passed away so the only possible solution would be me living with a friend or on my own.

    I am NOT looking to run away. I'm looking to find a solution that follows Florida law, but can also provide some relief and a buffer between my mother and me.

    I know Emancipation is an option, but I also know that it's a long shot, and Verbal abuse is very hard to prove in a court of law. I'm not looking for my mother to get in trouble either, which most likely could happen.

    I know this is a difficult question to answer, especially with multiple variables, but any help would be appreciated. If possible, It would help to know the specific laws on renting an apartment, collecting government checks and the laws on living alone as a minor.

    To be clear, I do not want to live on my own because of normal teenage problems (Thinking rules are too strict, dating issues, ect) I don't have those problems. I would like to live on my own because at the moment, my mother can have a temper and go into a 'temper tantrum' if she does not get her way or if one of us does not side with her all the time. My grandma's advice was 'accept the blame' for things that are not my fault. My mother can blow up at small things or even without provocation. It it NOT a emotionally stable enviroment for me.

    With that said, I should probably stop typing and post this thread. (Sorry for the long read!)

    You don't qualify for emancipation. If your mom says you can move, you can move. If not, you can't. Anyone who helps that she hasn't approved could get arrested. If you feel you are being abused report it.
  • 08-04-2017, 05:59 PM
    comment/ator
    Re: Can You Move Out if Your Parent is Verbally Abusive
    I'm sorry but I think this young person has a very exaggerated idea of what constitutes abuse serious enough to be unacceptable. "Intermittent explosive disorder" is something that would need to be diagnosed by a psychiatrist, I suspect this hasn't happened, and it is sort of used as a catch all for the fact that your mother is not a nice person. She has temper tantrums.

    From everything I read here, though, she is not physically abusive and unless the idea of living in foster care until you are eighteen appeals to you, I'd stay strictly away from trying to report her to child protective services. No one but no one is guaranteed stress free teenage years or nice parents. Only the most abusive and unconcerned parents, which I do not see here that your mother is anywhere near this category cause their teenagers to have to leave home under the sanctions of the court system and spend their teenage years elsewhere.
  • 08-04-2017, 06:26 PM
    Mercy&Grace
    Re: Can You Move Out if Your Parent is Verbally Abusive
    What makes you think you can get money from the government ? You are a child. Your mother is responsible for your care. The government is not going to give you money, or anything else, because you don't want to live at home. If you,receive benefits from your father. Your mother will be in charge of that until you turn 18 and are no longer eligible. When did your father die ?
  • 08-04-2017, 06:29 PM
    jumanji
    Re: Can You Move Out if Your Parent is Verbally Abusive
    One thing I must say in Mom's defense.... Dealing with not one (as I do), but TWO parents with dementia on a daily basis would make the most patient, stable person to occasionally (even often...) bust into a temper tantrum. Add in a teen with his/her own (normal) issues.... Going loopy more than usual is not a surprise.Not that I speak from personal experience..... ;)
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