Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: NJ
9 years ago, I called in DCP&P & alleged that my husband abused our 1 yr old child. Myself/child moved out of husband's house. Based on my statement, court determined that husband had abused child & I was given full legal/physical custody. To stay away from indefinite court processes, my husband chose not to take any visitation with child. Court also gave him 3 yr no contact and probation which he successfully completed 5 yrs ago. Court also told him that in case he needs visitation/custody, he can file petition & they may consider anger/parenting. I lived as single mom and husband also didn't marry and we never divorced.
I now realize that child is missing family & want to go back to husband. I am ok for my husband to get joint legal custody of child, if possible. Can me & my child go and start living with husband today or since he was the alleged perpetrator in the 9 yr old matter, I cannot go back to him? How can we get together (me, my child and husband)? How can he get child's custody?
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
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pegassist
My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: NJ
9 years ago, I called in DCP&P & alleged that my husband abused our 1 yr old child. Myself/child moved out of husband's house. Based on my statement, court determined that husband had abused child & I was given full legal/physical custody. To stay away from indefinite court processes, my husband chose not to take any visitation with child. Court also gave him 3 yr no contact and probation which he successfully completed 5 yrs ago. Court also told him that in case he needs visitation/custody, he can file petition & they may consider anger/parenting. I lived as single mom and husband also didn't marry and we never divorced.
I now realize that child is missing family & want to go back to husband. I am ok for my husband to get joint legal custody of child, if possible. Can me & my child go and start living with husband today or since he was the alleged perpetrator in the 9 yr old matter, I cannot go back to him? How can we get together (me, my child and husband)? How can he get child's custody?
You do understand that by going back to the person who was found to have abused your child, you risking losing your child entirely to the foster care system? If you move in with him again and he abuses your child again you will be considered to be equally liable for the abuse.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
You need to sit down with a lawyer to see what will be required to make this work without getting your husband in legal hot water. Without reading the orders the court issued no one can say what contact your husband may have with you and your child at this point. He may need to have the court orders changed before he can do anything.
But you need to ask yourself an important question: why do you want to get back together with a man who abused your child? How do you know that he won’t engage in more abuse of either you or your child should you return to living with him? Abusive behavior rarely just stops on its own.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
The way she used the alleged multiple times, it sounds like she lied about it back then. I could be way off, but that was my initial thought when reading that post
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
I am not going to assist someone who wishes to expose their own child to further abuse.
Frankly, this poor child needs to be someone capable of caring for them.
Just who ARE you? https://www.expertlaw.com/forums/sho...ht=#post286549
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
Yeah. This "person" needs to pay a lawyer. And a therapist.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
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pegassist
My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: NJ
9 years ago, I called in DCP&P & alleged that my husband abused our 1 yr old child. Myself/child moved out of husband's house. Based on my statement, court determined that husband had abused child & I was given full legal/physical custody. To stay away from indefinite court processes, my husband chose not to take any visitation with child. Court also gave him 3 yr no contact and probation which he successfully completed 5 yrs ago. Court also told him that in case he needs visitation/custody, he can file petition & they may consider anger/parenting. I lived as single mom and husband also didn't marry and we never divorced.
I now realize that child is missing family & want to go back to husband. I am ok for my husband to get joint legal custody of child, if possible. Can me & my child go and start living with husband today or since he was the alleged perpetrator in the 9 yr old matter, I cannot go back to him? How can we get together (me, my child and husband)? How can he get child's custody?
You really think the court will be on board with this after he was found to have abused your child? Your child can see his/her father's side of the family WITHOUT his/her father being in his/her life. Our daughter sees my ex in laws pretty often whether he's there or not.
Why would you ever want to go near someone who abused your child? I think you need some counseling. Do not go back to that "man."
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Dogmatique
Whoa. That sounds like the "ex" father commented in 2009 using the same user name. This is weird. I got a weird vibe when I read it too.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
You got it right - no abuse had happened but since the matter got in front of the court at that time, I couldn't retract as I was afraid I may get in trouble.
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Dogmatique
As indicated, no abuse ever happened. I was angry back in that time, made an allegation and was stuck and now I am regretting. Hence looking for help.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
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pegassist
You got it right - no abuse had happened but since the matter got in front of the court at that time, I couldn't retract as I was afraid I may get in trouble.
As indicated, no abuse ever happened. I was angry back in that time, made an allegation and was stuck and now I am regretting. Hence looking for help.
Hopefully the state will step in and do its job.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
Why have you been posting as both of you?
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
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pegassist
You got it right - no abuse had happened but since the matter got in front of the court at that time, I couldn't retract as I was afraid I may get in trouble.
As indicated, no abuse ever happened. I was angry back in that time, made an allegation and was stuck and now I am regretting. Hence looking for help.
SO did you post in 2009 or did your ex because the post that is from 2009 says the fiancée falsely accused you of abuse but you falsely accused someone of abuse.
YOU shouldn't have your kid if you made up false allegations of abuse and kept your child from his or her father for years. What kind of person does that? The only help you can get is from a lawyer maybe.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
I hope you didn't actually injure your own child in the effort to smear your fiancee.
Let's hope wise heads step in for the child's sake. You did a pretty rotten thing.
Get a lawyer.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
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geek
I hope you didn't actually injure your own child in the effort to smear your fiancee.
Let's hope wise heads step in for the child's sake. You did a pretty rotten thing.
Get a lawyer.
In the previous thread there is mention of actual red marks on the child so it appears someone injured the child. Either way this person either lied back then and did a dispicable thing by faking the abuse, and causing injury to the child to support their false claim and causing the other parent to lose an incredible amount of time with the child out of spite, or they are doing a dispicable thing now by attempting to bring the child back into an abusive situation.
Re: Reuniting With a Spouse Who You Left Over Abuse of Your Child
So the OP's title is pretty misleading as she did not leave a spouse over abuse of a child. She left due to faking abuse of a child and probably ruined her ex's life. Way to go OP. I'm sure you feel proud of yourself. Why the heck would your ex want to even be with you after you LIED about abuse to your child?