Does Hotel Staff Have to Report an Adult Trying to Check In With a Minor

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Quoting LegallyShocked

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Wow, are you saying an adult can be in a HOTEL ROOM alone with a minor kid and it is legal as long as they're not having sex (or, caught)? Sooo creepy. I mean, this isn't just "hanging out", it's getting a room together! Also, if it's out of town (which it was), aren't there kidnapping charges?

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Sure. Creepy is not criminal. And the adult could be a relative, a guardian, etc. Unless the parents object, or there is hanky panky occurring, no law prohibits an adult and a minor hanging out together.

And it's not kidnapping if the girl was there of her own accord. If the girl is there in violation of some other law, such as defying her parents, there to drink, smoke, have sex, or other criminal act, then the guy can be charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor as might be appropriate. But, just hanging together in the hotel room is not - in and of itself - a crime.

Other scenarios could include a coach/instructor of some sort (music, gymnastics, swimming, diving, etc) traveling with a pupil to a meet/recital or something similar. I think that there are a lot of assumptions being made here with nothing but supposition to round it out.

You saw (assuming you actually saw this) a girl who was a minor, for the sake of argument, with a man , possibly 30's, check into a hotel. The girl had a teddy bear. That's it. To say "that they were obviously a couple" is a wild assumption unless you witnessed them playing tonsil hockey or some other similar activity. Actin on these assumptions this man and girl were permitted to check in and, after ruminating on these assumptions, asked to leave.

I'd say this is pretty thin.

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Quoting LegallyShocked

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The man in the story told me. I see no reason he would lie or leave anything out since, as it is, he only made himself look like a pathetic creep.

(By the way, he said she was nearly 18, but looked about 13 or 14. Asian kid.)

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I would be interested in knowing the circumstances where this man decided to tell you of this incident. I don't believe you. Reading your posts is creepy.

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Quoting budwad

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I would be interested in knowing the circumstances where this man decided to tell you of this incident. I don't believe you. Reading your posts is creepy.

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I was kinda wondering the same thing. I'd hate to think a conversation involving this actually occurred: "Hey! This hotel stopped me from raping a child but don't worry, I took her to the Motel 6 and committed my crime! Can you believe the nerve of that first hotel?"

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Quoting LegallyShocked

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Thank you, that is interesting.
The man in the story told me. I see no reason he would lie or leave anything out since, as it is, he only made himself look like a pathetic creep. He admitted the girl looked much younger than 18, especially with her teddy bear. He admitted he looked like a creep, even if she was 18 (and looked it), because he was still a 30 year old with a teenager--and one that looked like she was barely in high school, if that. So, he looked like someone into girls who are not only super young, but actually look like children.
If it had been ME working at that hotel, I would have definitely reported him. But, AFTER carding the girl to verify, if possible. If, they refused to let me card her, and simply left, that would have made me more suspicious, and I would have reported my suspicions. Exploitation is simply not something I'd risk, or be wimpy about. If the girl is legal, the authorities can sort that out. It's only my job, morally, to report. (If I hear screams coming from my neighbor's house, I don't need to investigate the source and have certaintly before calling the cops. If it turns out to be nothing, that's great. If it's something, thank God I called.)
And, the hotel staff made clear they thought the girl was underage. Whether they also thought whoring was involved, who knows? But, underage, certainly was expressed clearly.



Wow, are you saying an adult can be in a HOTEL ROOM alone with a minor kid and it is legal as long as they're not having sex (or, caught)? Sooo creepy. I mean, this isn't just "hanging out", it's getting a room together! Also, if it's out of town (which it was), aren't there kidnapping charges?

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I'm starting to think you are the adult in the situation and are worried you are going to be caught doing something illegal. Your continued statements of speculation suggest you are attempting to discover what you might have to be concerned with when taking a minor girl to a hotel for illicit purposes.

Hoping you arent such a person;


You keep saying something about the hotel checking ID of the girl; they have no legal right to demand ID from the girl. Of course they can refuse to allow them service, as they apparently did. I can't recall a motel/hotel clerk or management ever checking the ID of those accompanying the person renting the room.

My 30+ yo daughter often carries a teddy bear with her when she travels. It's personal and private why she does but girls tend to do some things that appear immature to others. Being her father I know why my daughter takes her bear with her but to others I wouldn't be surprised to hear they saw it as the act of a child. The bear (in the case at hand) is, at best, supportive of a concern there may be an issue but in itself, meaningless.

Kidnapping is illegally taking of a person. You have no idea why the two were together. Suggesting kidnapping without any suggestion the older person was in fact forcing the younger person to be with him is wild speculation on your part.


As to them being in a room together; I have daughters and female grandchildren. I would have no problem sharing a room with them if traveling. I'm frugal and renting two rooms would be an unnecessary expense. One can be modest even when sharing a sleeping room with others. Heck, when the g-kids stay at my house it isn't unusual to wake and find more people in my bed than i recall being there when i fell asleep. Often times they watch movies with me and everybody falls asleep. You thinking something without anything other than what appears to be your extremely suspicious and perverse ideas is on you.


To you reporting this to the police; I sure hope you have something to support your concerns. So far the closest you have is "it's obvious they were a couple" yet you have stated nothing that supports that contention. So, what made it obvious they were a couple?

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Quoting LegallyShocked

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Thanks for your reply.
Yes, I am absolutely aware of all those possibilities. However, the hotel told them to leave based on their conviction that she was a minor. (I know about it because the guy, himself, told me.) In fact, I pointed out that the hotel should have carded her first, because she may, in fact, have been a young-looking 18-year-old. (Making the guy still a creep, but not a felon, IMO.) My point is that they told the couple to leave based on thinking she was a minor. I suspected that it might not be their legal obligation, but I am wondering about the mentality of such a decision. People on this site seem to have background knowledge of such things. Actually, it would make me a feel a lot better knowing there might have been more thought put into it than simply, "Kick them out." So, I was hoping that, perhaps, itwould be feasible to report the guy immediately after they left. I find it all unsettling that young girls are so easily preyed upon and no one looks out for them. Sending the predator on hs way is not lookng after the minor child. (By the way, he said she was nearly 18, but looked about 13 or 14. Asian kid.)

Also, it they were father-daughter or such, they would have simply said so. Even if they agreed to leave, they would not have done so without asserting their innocence.

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I think you are the man in the story. Get some help. You sound creepy.

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Quoting Mark47n

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Other scenarios could include a coach/instructor of some sort (music, gymnastics, swimming, diving, etc) traveling with a pupil to a meet/recital or something similar. I think that there are a lot of assumptions being made here with nothing but supposition to round it out.

You saw (assuming you actually saw this) a girl who was a minor, for the sake of argument, with a man , possibly 30's, check into a hotel. The girl had a teddy bear. That's it. To say "that they were obviously a couple" is a wild assumption unless you witnessed them playing tonsil hockey or some other similar activity. Actin on these assumptions this man and girl were permitted to check in and, after ruminating on these assumptions, asked to leave.

I'd say this is pretty thin.

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Ok, firstly, having a teenage girl stay with her male coach in a hotel room, on a trip alone is just plain unsafe. I don't think I have to go into THE MANY news stories about this scenario, some rather recent (swim coach and 13 year old girl competitor whom he was molesting and who thought she was in love with him, finally came out when she was an adult, huge news story in the media), plus all the child actors who have been molested under similar circumstances (staying with managers, etc.). That all makes me beyond sick, so I'm not going to delve further into it or entertain the idea that it might be "innocent". NO ONE with a brain or conscience lets their minor child daughter stay in a hotel room with her male coach, agent, manager, etc. NO DECENT MAN would risk his reputation or appearance by doing it. Nor would he even want to risk any temptation or perhaps the girl, being young and impressionable, having a "crush" and making advances on him which some adolescent girls are bold enough to do, and have done.
SECONDLY--HUGE SIGH, HERE-- PLEASE READ BACKGROUND: I am not assuming anything. I was not the staff who asked them to leave. I was not even there. I was told this story by the man, himself, the 30 year old with the teenage girlfriend. I think it's creepy. I think the staff not reporting to the police was irresponsible. Suspicions that a minor might be exploited are serious enough to report and risk being wrong about. It is not ok to risk being right and not reporting it, IMO. If the police don't take it seriously, that is on them.
Regarding the hotel staff, they had proof of the man's age because he's the one who rented the room with his ID and credit card, the normal things one presents when booking and checking in. There was no assumption about his age, but about the girl's. The "obvious couple" is, AGAIN, (I've repeated this so many times now), what the man told me. If HE is saying it, and HE was the one with her, then that's not my assumption, it's his report. The hotel staff may be said to have "assumed" they were a couple, but the man, himself, said it was not only true, but obvious. They weren't pretending otherwise, trying to sneak her in on the downlow, or trying to deny they were a couple. He didn't argue with the hotel that she was his niece, sister, whatever. He accepted that they knew he was with this girl.

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Quoting jk

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I'm starting to think you are the adult in the situation and are worried you are going to be caught doing something illegal. Your continued statements of speculation suggest you are attempting to discover what you might have to be concerned with when taking a minor girl to a hotel for illicit purposes.

Hoping you arent such a person;


You keep saying something about the hotel checking ID of the girl; they have no legal right to demand ID from the girl. Of course they can refuse to allow them service, as they apparently did. I can't recall a motel/hotel clerk or management ever checking the ID of those accompanying the person renting the room.

My 30+ yo daughter often carries a teddy bear with her when she travels. It's personal and private why she does but girls tend to do some things that appear immature to others. Being her father I know why my daughter takes her bear with her but to others I wouldn't be surprised to hear they saw it as the act of a child. The bear (in the case at hand) is, at best, supportive of a concern there may be an issue but in itself, meaningless.

Kidnapping is illegally taking of a person. You have no idea why the two were together. Suggesting kidnapping without any suggestion the older person was in fact forcing the younger person to be with him is wild speculation on your part.


As to them being in a room together; I have daughters and female grandchildren. I would have no problem sharing a room with them if traveling. I'm frugal and renting two rooms would be an unnecessary expense. One can be modest even when sharing a sleeping room with others. Heck, when the g-kids stay at my house it isn't unusual to wake and find more people in my bed than i recall being there when i fell asleep. Often times they watch movies with me and everybody falls asleep. You thinking something without anything other than what appears to be your extremely suspicious and perverse ideas is on you.


To you reporting this to the police; I sure hope you have something to support your concerns. So far the closest you have is "it's obvious they were a couple" yet you have stated nothing that supports that contention. So, what made it obvious they were a couple?

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SIGH. I am wondering if some of you even read my post in full before responding. I debated whether to even answer because the suggestions, here, have gotten WAY out of hand. Now, you're wondering if the crep in question is ME. Oh, geez. Talk about wild assumptions! The reason I decided to try, YET AGAIN, to clarify is because I don't want anyone unecessarily being disturbed by this wild idea (that I am the man) because that is something I can empathize with, being disturbed by such a story. That's why I posted in the first place. As frustrating as it is to have to KEEP repeating myself, I am at least glad to know that most people are decent enough to agree that this scenario is a creepy one. You defend the guy's possible innocence, yet admit you "hope" I am not "such a person". Clearly, you are NOT ok with such a man. (How could you be, as a father of a daughter?)


As for, "You thinking something without anything other than what appears to be your extremely suspicious and perverse ideas is on you." I understand that you want to defend someone who might be like you, a father or grandfather with female children. But, can you REALLY not see ANYTHING suspicious AT ALL about a 30 year old White man checking into a hotel with a teddy bear-toting Asian teenage girl? 30 is NOT old enough to be her father, certainly not grandfather. Let's not quibble over far-fecthed possibilities such as how he could have had her when he was 13, AND she could be biracial and look like her mother AND whatever other fairytales one might dream up. Let's be realistic. They look like they're together. (And, in fact, they were.) Is that an assumption? Yes, but a reasonable one. It is one the hotel staff made when asking them to leave. And, the man did not try to talk his way out or pretend that it wasn't exactly what it looked like: a grown man with his teen girlfriend. Now, she could have been a legal teen, sure. But, most people who think 30 and 17 is gross, are going to feel the same way about 30 and 18. Legal doesn't make it ok for an adult to have sex with a kid, which is what a teenager is. If you think you feel differently, please let me know when your teen granddaughter starts sleeping with men in their 30s and you find it all perfectly ok.

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Quoting cdwjava

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Sure. Creepy is not criminal. And the adult could be a relative, a guardian, etc. Unless the parents object, or there is hanky panky occurring, no law prohibits an adult and a minor hanging out together.

And it's not kidnapping if the girl was there of her own accord. If the girl is there in violation of some other law, such as defying her parents, there to drink, smoke, have sex, or other criminal act, then the guy can be charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor as might be appropriate. But, just hanging together in the hotel room is not - in and of itself - a crime.

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It was my understanding that if an adult drives a minor across certain lines (state? county?), it is automatically kidnapping. That's what I was asking. Just like a minor cannot legally consent to sex, thereby making it rape, she also cannot legally consent to travelling out of town with an adult without it being kidnapping. That was my confusion and question about what is legally considered kidnapping. Obviously, if a parent gives permission, it is not kidnapping. I am, obviously, not talking about such cases.

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Quoting free9man

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I was kinda wondering the same thing. I'd hate to think a conversation involving this actually occurred: "Hey! This hotel stopped me from raping a child but don't worry, I took her to the Motel 6 and committed my crime! Can you believe the nerve of that first hotel?"

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I am only replying to this--and I hope I don't regret it--because it would be a real shame if you were disturbed by something totally false. The entire reason I posted in the first place is that this man's story was disturbing to me, as are all stories of exploitation of young girls, or any type of predatory activity. Legal or not, it is WRONG for a grown man to take advantage of a young girl. She does not know what she is doing, however grown-up and mature she thinks she is--and they ALL think they're mature. It's part of being young and immature.
I am not going to give explicit details on how I came to hear this man's story. No, of course he was not saying, "Hey, I went down the street to rape a child." He was telling an embarrassing story about himself having been stupid (at minimum) and delusional enough to date a teenage girl when he was 30. I don't know why people reveal such things. I did not want to hear the story, and I wish I hadn't. Have you NEVER been around someone telling a story that you wish they weren't telling? Have you never allowed someone to speak despite being disturbed by what they said? Have you never heard more than you wanted to hear because you had no chance to escape before hearing it? I didn't know what he was going to say, and when he said it, it was too late to leave the room. Can you not imagine jobs and other scenarios in which people share unsettling things? (Therapy, support groups, hotlines, church meetings--places where everyone feels accepted. Even just people hanging out in groups, gabbing, saying more than they should.)

Admittedly,,, as I wrote the post at 0430 I might miss some of the details and I recognize that can affect the relevance. The primary detail I missed, the age of the male and your source don't affect the other assumptions you're making. That said, YOU'RE feeling it's questionable doesn't mean that it is.

Finally, if you have the entire story from your buddy then what are you doing here speculating about it? Clearly you have more information than you're sharing and just want to vent about how squicked out you are about this.

As to the idea that driving a minor across state lines is kidnapping: poppycock. Driving a monor anywhere without the consent of the parents is kidnapping but the key word is consent. It's a pesky workd, I know, as it can change everything.

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Quoting LegallyShocked

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I am not going to give explicit details on how I came to hear this man's story.....He was telling an embarrassing story about himself having been stupid (at minimum) and delusional enough to date a teenage girl when he was 30. I don't know why people reveal such things. I did not want to hear the story, and I wish I hadn't. Have you NEVER been around someone telling a story that you wish they weren't telling? Have you never allowed someone to speak despite being disturbed by what they said? Have you never heard more than you wanted to hear because you had no chance to escape before hearing it? I didn't know what he was going to say, and when he said it, it was too late to leave the room. Can you not imagine jobs and other scenarios in which people share unsettling things? (Therapy, support groups, hotlines, church meetings--places where everyone feels accepted. Even just people hanging out in groups, gabbing, saying more than they should.)

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Do you know who Shirley Mason was?

You say it was obvious they were a couple yet you described nothing to support that. You said the man Admitted being a couple (a new statement in your latest post). Actually you never even suggested that before. You said the manager said he had to leave and he left. You didn't say the manager accused him of anything nor did you say the man said anything but simply left. In fact you were accusing the man simply because he did not protest.

especially since you were not there (wink, wink), it would mean you are accepting another party's description which will be influenced by their interpretations. You do realize why hearsay evidence is not accepted in a court, don't you?


so, what was this person that relayed all of this to you doing while all of this went on? Does he always just hang out in hotel lobbies watching people and listening in on their conversations? That's a bit creepy all in itself.

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Quoting LegallyShocked

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Ok, firstly, having a teenage girl stay with her male coach in a hotel room, on a trip alone is just plain unsafe. I don't think I have to go into THE MANY news stories about this scenario, some rather recent (swim coach and 13 year old girl competitor whom he was molesting and who thought she was in love with him, finally came out when she was an adult, huge news story in the media), plus all the child actors who have been molested under similar circumstances (staying with managers, etc.). That all makes me beyond sick, so I'm not going to delve further into it or entertain the idea that it might be "innocent". NO ONE with a brain or conscience lets their minor child daughter stay in a hotel room with her male coach, agent, manager, etc. NO DECENT MAN would risk his reputation or appearance by doing it. Nor would he even want to risk any temptation or perhaps the girl, being young and impressionable, having a "crush" and making advances on him which some adolescent girls are bold enough to do, and have done.
SECONDLY--HUGE SIGH, HERE-- PLEASE READ BACKGROUND: I am not assuming anything. I was not the staff who asked them to leave. I was not even there. I was told this story by the man, himself, the 30 year old with the teenage girlfriend. I think it's creepy. I think the staff not reporting to the police was irresponsible. Suspicions that a minor might be exploited are serious enough to report and risk being wrong about. It is not ok to risk being right and not reporting it, IMO. If the police don't take it seriously, that is on them.
Regarding the hotel staff, they had proof of the man's age because he's the one who rented the room with his ID and credit card, the normal things one presents when booking and checking in. There was no assumption about his age, but about the girl's. The "obvious couple" is, AGAIN, (I've repeated this so many times now), what the man told me. If HE is saying it, and HE was the one with her, then that's not my assumption, it's his report. The hotel staff may be said to have "assumed" they were a couple, but the man, himself, said it was not only true, but obvious. They weren't pretending otherwise, trying to sneak her in on the downlow, or trying to deny they were a couple. He didn't argue with the hotel that she was his niece, sister, whatever. He accepted that they knew he was with this girl.

SIGH. I am wondering if some of you even read my post in full before responding. I debated whether to even answer because the suggestions, here, have gotten WAY out of hand. Now, you're wondering if the crep in question is ME. Oh, geez. Talk about wild assumptions! The reason I decided to try, YET AGAIN, to clarify is because I don't want anyone unecessarily being disturbed by this wild idea (that I am the man) because that is something I can empathize with, being disturbed by such a story. That's why I posted in the first place. As frustrating as it is to have to KEEP repeating myself, I am at least glad to know that most people are decent enough to agree that this scenario is a creepy one. You defend the guy's possible innocence, yet admit you "hope" I am not "such a person". Clearly, you are NOT ok with such a man. (How could you be, as a father of a daughter?)

As for, "You thinking something without anything other than what appears to be your extremely suspicious and perverse ideas is on you." I understand that you want to defend someone who might be like you, a father or grandfather with female children. But, can you REALLY not see ANYTHING suspicious AT ALL about a 30 year old White man checking into a hotel with a teddy bear-toting Asian teenage girl? 30 is NOT old enough to be her father, certainly not grandfather. Let's not quibble over far-fecthed possibilities such as how he could have had her when he was 13, AND she could be biracial and look like her mother AND whatever other fairytales one might dream up. Let's be realistic. They look like they're together. (And, in fact, they were.) Is that an assumption? Yes, but a reasonable one. It is one the hotel staff made when asking them to leave. And, the man did not try to talk his way out or pretend that it wasn't exactly what it looked like: a grown man with his teen girlfriend. Now, she could have been a legal teen, sure. But, most people who think 30 and 17 is gross, are going to feel the same way about 30 and 18. Legal doesn't make it ok for an adult to have sex with a kid, which is what a teenager is. If you think you feel differently, please let me know when your teen granddaughter starts sleeping with men in their 30s and you find it all perfectly ok.

It was my understanding that if an adult drives a minor across certain lines (state? county?), it is automatically kidnapping. That's what I was asking. Just like a minor cannot legally consent to sex, thereby making it rape, she also cannot legally consent to travelling out of town with an adult without it being kidnapping. That was my confusion and question about what is legally considered kidnapping. Obviously, if a parent gives permission, it is not kidnapping. I am, obviously, not talking about such cases.

I am only replying to this--and I hope I don't regret it--because it would be a real shame if you were disturbed by something totally false. The entire reason I posted in the first place is that this man's story was disturbing to me, as are all stories of exploitation of young girls, or any type of predatory activity. Legal or not, it is WRONG for a grown man to take advantage of a young girl. She does not know what she is doing, however grown-up and mature she thinks she is--and they ALL think they're mature. It's part of being young and immature.
I am not going to give explicit details on how I came to hear this man's story. No, of course he was not saying, "Hey, I went down the street to rape a child." He was telling an embarrassing story about himself having been stupid (at minimum) and delusional enough to date a teenage girl when he was 30. I don't know why people reveal such things. I did not want to hear the story, and I wish I hadn't. Have you NEVER been around someone telling a story that you wish they weren't telling? Have you never allowed someone to speak despite being disturbed by what they said? Have you never heard more than you wanted to hear because you had no chance to escape before hearing it? I didn't know what he was going to say, and when he said it, it was too late to leave the room. Can you not imagine jobs and other scenarios in which people share unsettling things? (Therapy, support groups, hotlines, church meetings--places where everyone feels accepted. Even just people hanging out in groups, gabbing, saying more than they should.)

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so this person (the adult male) has admitted to you bis intent was to rape the child?

have you reported this to the police? While you are incensed the hotel manager did not report this, you now have heard a confession of a child rapist. The statute of limitations for such crimes is lengthy and does not begin to run until the victim reaches the age of majority.

So, are you allowing this sick criminal to run free? That is so much more egregious than what you are blaming the hotel manager for.